"The Naked Quidditch Match" and Jeconias' "This means war!" both use "m-mail" extensively. I like how it is used, but then I really enjoy technomancy stories like "Prodigy".

 

IM Drabbles by KEZandOG
James, Sirius, Remus, and Lily get to use computers and internet is Muggle Studies class, what happens when they get to use IMing? LERL JPSBRating will go up.

Hogwarts Online by hhrdgrl
My answer to a challenge Hogwarts gets the internet and relationships bloom

These are just two examples of hundreds.

 

I liked their use in Naked Quidditch and TMW as well, but they are pretty much the only ones who did it well.

But AIM in the 1970s? I can see where this story leads. Even more disturbing though is the "LERL JPSB". I mean, fuck.

Anyone care to guess who these exact four people will be?

As for the second story:

Uh-huh. I'm sure in her mind that sounded absolutely logical...

My proposed rule no. 1: Don't write stupid shit.

 

The m-mail from This Means War was hilarious. It was inspired by Naked Quidditch Match, which sort of pioneered the whole magical e-mail thing AFAIK. Anyway, the m-mail conversations in TMW had me in stitches.

Outside of a comedic situation like those two stories, I generally find the concept annoying.

 

This Means War - When the Weasley Boys interfere in Ginny's relationship with Dean, they make the biggest mistake of their lives. The witch decides that revenge is in order, and her first point of call is a new boyfriend - Harry.

Naked Quidditch - a story with wimp!Harry in which the girls control Harry and make him do something he doesn't want to do (play quidditch naked).

Not what I thought was DLP material.

 

Jeconais is a shit author.

 

Bioplague, when you can write as much, and as well, as Jeconais, you can bitch about him being a 'shit' author. Until then, fuck off.

 

You make it sound like you wrote those fics. Merril has written more than you and better than you so I don't think that's your place. I don't like Jeconais' fics either, just because you do doesn't mean everyone else does. They might be "well written" but I still think they're shit.

 

YEAH, I'LL KILL YOU! _O_O_O!

Erm...forget that last part.

Merrill is a good author, and talent-wise I'd put him above Jeconais just because of his command over the language. Plot-wise, Jeconais has a shitload of ideas that he's written, but in every story of his that I've liked, something has come in to ruin it.

In White Knight Grey Queen, Ginny came in for no fucking reason. In Hope, the angst reaches a level where I can't read it anymore without getting the feeling like I'm gona retch and spew puke everywhere.

His other fics...they're good reads, but I wouldn't classify him in my top 10 authors.

And Crazy1, relax, mate. That's just what Bio does...he gets on peoples' nerves, and loves it

Bio: ZOMG STFU YOU FUCKEN TROLL!

 

So when I can dribble a basketball as skillfully as Kobe Bryant, I can call him a shit basketball player?

I better back off now then! You're liable to shoot me with that dope ass gun in your avatar for disagreeing with you!

Moving on from your shitty avatar, however, the fact is: content.

You can write circles around everyone, write five-hundred thousand word novels and the story can still suck more ass than your avatar. And that's what Jeconais and all those shitty authors at FanFicAuthors.net are skilled at.
Writing dull stories. And the new ones are just different takes with the same cardboard cutout characters.

Prime example being the moron who probably started the site: Kinsfire.

And they do have a select few people who follow their stories and who shit a storm when anyone finds fault with the characterisation or the dull plot, like you. What can I say? They're a bit dense, like you.

Now the real key comes into play: they have a site where you can enjoy their stories and a forum where you can fellatio Kinsfire for his awesome Harry-Fucks-Hermione'sMom story until your fingers break off.

Fortunately, it's not this one.

 

Nah. I just did a quick search on FF.Net and picked two at random.

 

Umm, are you guys still doing Potter Law? If so, I think that I have one. Someone posted a while back

I came up with this.
Harry Potter can not fall in love or even be interested with Ginny for the simple fact (except the Half Backed Plot which I hope to forget with all of my little, black heart) the only plot that she was involved in caused Harry to nearly die. Ginny Weasley is and always will be a sub-character.

Now I know that it is not cold enough, but someone with the right skills could go somewhere with this. (Don't know how far)
dark007

 

I may have been a bit OTT, but I can't stand people who insult an extreme amount of work. I may not have written anything myself (yet). But I have an immense amount of respect for those that can write something as large as Jeconais'.

 

Can we get a final ruling on Hermione's character?

I propose this:

- She is to be protrayed as intelligent...not necessarily common sense, but having knowledge through pure effort.

- She might know how to research, but she will NOT find the location of the Horcruxes, super-duper rituals that work just in the nick of time for Harry to beat Voldemort, and she will never achieve more knowledge than Super!Harry, Voldemort or Dumbledore.

- She, and her family, are NOT and will NEVER BE nudists, and or promiscuous in all things sexual.

- She, through reading a book or five million, will never be as skillful as a pornstar in her first sexual experience. She will also not be an outgoing tramp, and or get a makeover from her American cousin over the summer. She will never be the one to instigate a physical relationship, unless Wimp!Harry or Wimp!OtherCharacter has spent 5 years without touching her.

- She will not orgasm in a theatrical way, screaming her head off and bucking around like a retarded platypus.

How does that sound?

Edit: Amendment to the second one...the Hogwarts Library will never give her every answer she might ever need. Additionally, when Sirius dies, he will not leave her his library. He might leave he a book entitled 'Get a fucking life, you egotistical, stuck-up bitch!' but never more than that.

 

Hermione will never go out with Severus Snape or Draco Malfoy because she is a filthy mud blood who no selfrespecting Slytherin would touch. Even Snape is better than this bitch.

Hermione will never be shown to be a good dueler. She will however be shown to freeze under pressure and die a slow and painful death under crucio until her precious brain leak out her ears.

 

Hmm... I just read the topic and found it quite interesting.

If I may add to it...

- If you decide to write Harry as a badass assassin, then have act like a badass assassin. I've read too many stories in which he's this top-of-the-line hired killer, and yet he can't perform a simple job without getting caught and sent to Hogwarts.

Yeah, that's about it.

 

Bold, Italic, and underlined is my addition.

 

Sama's Corrollary to #XIV: Unless its a crossover, in which case you're free to make allowences to perserve the flavor/nature of the other series.