Promotion


“You’re bleeding on my floor.”

“Half my team is injured, and my one good wizard is dealing with a leg amputation, and you complain about your floor! If you weren’t so good at the healer’s art I’d-“

There was a flash of silver light, silence, and the witch ceased her speaking, her moving, though not the drip of blood from her robes onto the wizard’s mahogany floor.

“Dobby. Clean the mess.” The wizard sighed as he stood up from his chair, the polished wood matching his floor, the witch’s eyes wide as she followed the movements of the wand in his hand. The elm focus traced the wound at her shoulder, her flesh knitting together. There was a pop, and a dirty house elf appeared with a clean towel, scrubbing at the red stain.

With a wave of his wand, his hold on her was broken, “Lucius, I do not find this amusing. Thank you for the healing, but you don’t have to be an Unspeakable. The silent brooding doesn’t fit you.” He put his white Death Eater’s mask back on his face.

“Our lord is waiting for us, sister in law, and I’ve come from own my own strike. I’m not going to listen to you rant while dirtying my floor further. You can complain to Narcissa all about it. Later.”

And he strolled off, leaving an incensed Bellatrix Black behind, kicking the filthy elf on her way to follow her brother in law, donning her own silver mask as well. It would not do to keep her Master waiting.

----
They were not the last to come into the audience hall of Lord Voldemort, and they brushed their way past to stand close to the dais. Their lord wore no mask, his pale beauty and charisma a greater shield than the anonymity his followers took. He stared at a scroll intently. Bellatrix watched closely, seeing whisps of flame over the top of the scroll, and faint red marks as whatever burned its way onto the parchment.

A few straggled more in, some still bleeding, though Lucius did not spare a glimpse at them. They had struck hard tonight, and anyone on his feet could stand a little longer.

“My knights of Walpurgis, you have done well.” Their Lord said, the scroll bursting into flames in his hands, his skin unburnt, despite the heat that made Lucius almost step back. “You are aware of Minister Jenkin’s demise, her power stripped, her home laid bare, and her wealth subsumed within my kingdom. I will not tolerate those who will oppose me. The new minister was warned, and he did not submit to my superiority. And by this time next month, he will find himself alone at home. And there I will meet him, and I shall bring him the peace he so desperately wanted.”

Peals of laughter erupted from the crowd, Bellatrix leading them, and even Lucius smiled at his Lord’s humor.

“Come forward, my Inner Circle.”

Bellatrix, along with one who Lucius suspected was Avery, and three others approached.

“5 targets were given. 12 deaths were recorded, 5 dark marks were raised, and 20 pieces of scum were cleaned from the earth tonight. Whom among you was worth my notice?”

There was silence, and the mirth that had been present evaporated. The Dark Lord’s attention was not something to be trifled with. Each of the five liutenants had been examined and found pleasing. But a dozen others had not, and were fortunate to not be on this earth any longer.

“My lord.” Bellatrix spoke up, “You will note that I personally executed 4 blood traitors.”

“I myself executed 13 muggles, each screaming to their last.” Probably-Avery blurted in.

“Like that is an accomplishment, my owl could probably kill more.” Bellatrix huffed. “Muggles aren’t worth crowing about.”

“My lord,” Lucius bowed, his voice cutting through the two’s bickering, “I and my team completed our task without injury, nor did we tarry. 1 blood traitor and 1 auror fell before us.” That the auror was struck at her own home was not important. Another one of their enemies brought down and destroyed.

“Oh?” Lord Voldemort asked, his eyes showing no surprise, “And who dueled this auror?”

“No one My Lord.” Lucius bowed his head, “To serve your will, we forsook our pride and focused on killing her. She had enough time to cast a single shield spell. Against your knights, such weakness was her downfall.”

The killing curse had cut through her shield like a hammer through wet cardboard, with a messy shatter and a wet thump, as her body tumbled to the floor. The team had enjoyed themselves with her husband.

The other four glared at Lucius, their masks hiding their faces, but Lucius could still feel their looks of hate. His own gloating smile was hidden by his mask.

“A wizards pride is a lovely offering to me.” He waved his hand, and Lucius was bodily dragged forward from the crowd, “I have seen what you did tonight my newest Liutenant.” The great lord said, waving a wand over Lucius’ mask. His mask shifted from bone white to pure silver. “And I find it pleasing to me.”

He turned to address the crowd of witches and wizards, and Lucius felt pride that he was finally beginning to understand his Lord. Soon that understanding would yield some measure of safety, and from that safety, a new kind of power would be his.

“My Knights, rest and enjoy yourselves. We shall let them fear our strike, and let their panic feed on itself until the terror becomes its own noose around their neck. Then we shall pull the floor from under them, and let the Ministry and blood traitors hang.”

A cheer rose from the crowd.

----

“I hope everyone is having a good summer vacation?” The chairman, Cassio Bones asked the board. “Lucius, would you be so good, as the junior member, to create the minuta scriptura?”

Lucius smiled graciously, even as he envisoned the chairaman screaming himself hoarse under Lord Voldemort’s treatment. A casual flick of his wand, and the ink flowed into the parchment.

Cassio Bones, chairman, calls meeting to order, 10:06 AM. Vice chair Madam Millicent Weasley seconds. Meeting begins. Tuition increase debated. Madam Bletchley calls for tripling of tuition fees to cover incraese security in light of disappearances and attacks, and large number of mudblood students. Madam Longbottom objects to the term mudblood being used in official minutae, objection is not seconded. Chairman Bones suggests a more modest 20% increase for the security, to come from pureblood families. Madam Longbottom, Mister Malfoy, Madame Bletchley oppose. Madam Weasley counterpoints with an offer of apprenticeship for graduating 7th years to stay and act as free security. Chairman Bones repeats “those who can’t do; get a mastery” four times. Mister Malfoy offers a 40% increase in tuition, with an increase in funding for the hospital wing.

Chairman Bones struck by Madam Bletchley’s handkerchief. Madam Weasley throws handkerchief at Madam Bletchley, who throws it at Mister Malfoy. Madam Longbottom leaves. Meeting adjourned after 10 minutes of incoherent screaming. Tuition remains next item for next meeting, set for day after Yule.

----
“I’m sorry Poppy. I tried to get them to see reason, but their pride gets in the way.” He offered the mediwitch a sigh, refilling her glass in her office. Without students, the rules of drinking in the office were relaxed, but poppy stuck to a light wine, compared to his firewhiskey. “Thank you Lucius. I’m so tired of the board and their intransience. What I wouldn’t give to have one of them rushed here with a case of Pixie Dropsy and my sadness that my budget can’t afford a good anti-pixie potion set!” The medi-witch fumed, drinking more of her wine. “If one of them came down with Pixie Dropsy, you know that I’d hate to have to exterminate the entire castle, and hold classes outside. Filch would suffer a flare of gout without anything to do.” Poppy burst out laughing, “Oh, I wish you had stayed in the field Lucius. You would have torn St. Mungo’s apart and built it so much better. Your research into dragon pox was my proudest moment as a mentor, and I’m so sad you didn’t continue.”

“We’ve been over this several times Poppy, but I can’t live that life. I have a wife and aged mother to look after, as well as my roles on the board of governors and the Malfoy Apothecary. To be a medi-wizard on top would have meant stopping my good work.” Nevermind the most important work, to ensure safety for his family and Hogwarts from the coming storm.

Poppy’s face sagged with disappointment, as it always did. This was a well-trod road for them. She sipped her wine, and changed topics, “Have you heard anything more about the attacks Lucius? Jonathan told me that they found one of the bodies with cruciatus residue spilling off of him. I can’t even imagine what sick monster would cause pain like that!”
“Truly vile. I had heard the same from him as well. St. Mungos is keeping a larger emergency portkey staff, and they are looking for volunteers. Unofficially, you can expect a letter from their Director in a few weeks. But I urge you, please stay here. We need someone with your talents here.” Lucius did not plead, but he did ask with a firmness backed up by true convictions. Too many pureblooded children were susceptible, and Dumbledore would never take the security measures necessary, even if he had a real budget to work with. He needed the best mediwitch to stay at the school, too much of the future was at risk without her to mitigate.

“How do you know that Lucius? I just got the letter this morning!” Lucius cursed himself, and then the toady Jonathan. A good student, and a fantastic gossip, but only for the bloodiest of stories. “But I can’t stay here Lucius. The students suffer nothing more impressive than bone breaks or boil potions, or some pranks with hair loss or some other embarassement. I could save more lives in a week there than I do in 5 years here. They certainly don’t pay me enough here, I’m barely making more than Slughorn!”

“Now how do you how much we pay Slughorn Poppy?” Lucius asked with a teasing smile, trying to defuse and deflect her angry. An angry Pomfrey was stubborn.

“Because you told-“ Poppy started, before catching herself, “But my point still stands! I’m wasted here. You could get a fresh from apprenticeship medi-witch to take care of the children. It would be a good learning experience for them.” Lucius felt the anger inside him rise. She was make excellent arguments, but didn’t know all the facts! If she knew, he’d be able to keep her, but then she’d probably tell Dumbledore, and then he’d be on the run. No, there had to be a way to get this goal accomplished.

“But Poppy-“ “No buts! If I’m the best mediwitch you’ve ever worked under, and I am, then you know I should be in the emergency portkey ward.” Lucius nodded. There was no convincing her now.

“Especially with that Potter boy and his friends gone. I swear the four of them put more people in here than your father, and that was when dueling was still legal.” She drank more of her wine, and Lucius realized that she had drank probably more than she should. He would have to give her a sobering charm before he left.

“Yes, I heard they put themselves here quite a few times as well. Gryffindor bravery is remarkable short-fused.”

“Yes, though the last time they ended up with Potter having a boil in his glottis.” Lucius perked up, that wasn’t exactly common, “And every time I lanced it it grew back, but, pay attention here, the boil drained orange fluid. He also had a terrible chill, and his urine was bright orange as well.” Lucius thought for a moment, “And he had no headache or arm symptoms?” “None.” “Then its clearly a derivative of a boil ointment, probably emulsified with erumpet horn to make it a potion that would leach into the kidneys.”

“Wrong!” She practically sang, clearly competent, but clearly could not hold her liquor. Lucius was now quite interested, and fell back into the usual patterns they had done in their schooling. “What else did he have? Was the pulse thready? That would be some nightshade mixed in? Or did he have any pupil dilation? Blightcap mushroom poisoning could explain some of it.” “Nope. Though I’m glad to see you going down the same thought process I did. But you are forgetting what they teach you in 6th year herbology.”

Lucius frowned. He ran the course in his head, trying to remember what herbs could possibly be involved. They covered so much that year, almost all of it medicinal herbs. He had loved the class, but what could possibly cause orange boils in the throat?

He shook his head, “It eludes me. What did the idiot drink?”

She nodded, “I admit, I had a little help. I brought his friends in and made them empty their pockets and supplies, telling me everything. None of it was contraband, because no one would think to ban it, or they had made it themselves. Honestly, who keeps a mechanical owl that drops potion pellets? But what do I find in Pettrigrew’s potion set? Venemous Tentacula poison, in a 1:100 dilution.”

“Anti-pixie dosage.” Lucius winced, they had been hammered over and over on the point, strictly because it was interesting to see men cry in orange. He had prided himself on ignoring such ‘trivial facts’. “Venemous tentacula at low dosages tints all body fluid orange, which explains the boil color and the urine, as well as the chills from the poison. And of course, they used a water base for their potion because they were idiots, and the poison is only partially soluble, so he got a nearly full dose in the back of his throat. So you gave him charcoal and firewhiskey and the problem disappears.” Lucius runs through the scenario in his mind, “He was trying to find a potion to help him ditch class.” He concludes, knowing as many 7th year gryffindors as he had the unfortunate displeasure of meeting. Though the skill involved in even thinking up such a plot was not insignificant. Pettrigrew. He would remember that name.

Poppy nodded along, “100%. You really should have pursued the mastery. But! When the accio for the firewhiskey came, look what I found that had been hiding behind it.” She pulled a glass orb out of her desk. Lucius looked at it with curiousity, it was hollow with spicules of pink and light green sticking further into the sealed interior. The inside glowed dark red, with hazy motes flitting around. As he watched one burst into a bright light that faded. Suddenly he recognized it. “One of my dragon pox cultures! And it has live vectors!” He took the ball from her gently, holding the preserved glass to the light. Inside, growing in a near perfect sphere, was clusters of dragon pox, the spores making it a truly beautiful creation. “But they all failed. None of them grew spores. Its why I abandoned the research.” Lucius turned the glass, continuing to look at what could have been, and if he played his cards right, what might yet be.

“Thank you Poppy, do you mind if I keep it?” “Of course Lucius, please keep me informed of your discovery.” “I will, but unfortunately, I do have to go. It was great to see you again.”

He had an appointment to keep, and timing would be critical.

----

“Yes, human?”

“My vault, Goblin.” Lucius growled, baring his teeth and slamming his key down on the desk. Goblins respected two things: gold and force. And if it meant acting like a gorilla to get the process moving faster, then he would show all of his teeth.

He clutched tightly the folded parchment in his hand. He had one chance, and this would cement his family’s legacy for generations. He took the golden chain from the hook within his family vault, and strode back out quickly, taking less than a minute. “Done already?” The goblin asked, confused. Most tall folk took forever looking at their borrowed gold. “Yes.” Lucius glared and bared his teeth, and the goblin quickly returned them to the lobby.

----

Lucius was under his drawing room, looking at the cursed weapons and tomes, the great treasures of his family, and held the ball in his hands. In his hand was the true winner’s gambit, with it he could not lose, no matter his choice.

With live spores growing in a controlled medium, a cure for dragon pox would be his. The last great scourge of wizardkind, the ravager of families, the Dragon of all diseases, would be slain. Wealth and prestige would flow to his family enough to protect them for a hundred generations. Not since Armand had carved the Malfoy name into English land would such a benefit be raised for his family. Petty squabblers like Crouch or Dumbledore would be beneath their notice, let alone interest. But that would require retirement to his laboratory, decades of work, and certainly the ire of the Dark Lord.

But if he used it now, he could secure a smaller victory, he could gain smaller influence and much more support from Voldemort. Dragon pox spores were notoriously virulent, and no one would suspect anyone to use it as a weapon. And now that he knew it could be done once, he could dedicate his time to figuring out how to do it again. It was the safer choice, and the one with more immediate rewards.

On the first hand though, the reward of independence, power, and prestige was too good to pass up without due consideration. There was however, only so much time to dither.

He twisted the ball, the black light from the Sword of Grief making the spores appear as like purple fireworks of death. To be the slayer of death, or to become death itself?

There was a pop, and the filthy house-elf appeared on the stairs, “Master, Mistress Bellatrix has appeared, she said there is very urgent business.” Lucius turned the ball one more time, before wrapping it in a handkerchief, tucking it into his robe pocket. “I will see her in the foyer. Tell Narcissa that I shall not be home for a few hours.” Likely the Dark Lord had some pressing need of him.
----

“One of our safe houses has been compromised.” The dark lord said, the emotionless tone chilling even more than the dark tableau in front of him and his liutenants. “We have a few hours hour before the Order apparates in.” There was a pitiful, gurgling moan from the nearly formless shape in front of the Dark Lord. Lucius and another lieutenant, Rookwood perhaps? both glanced down at the traitor’s remains. The Dark Lord was master of all magicks, both entropic sorcery and healing spells. Which, as whoever this poor fool had been learned, did not combine pleasantly.

“We shall turn this trap upon them. They are expecting to catch us flat footed. Our spies will cut off their reinforcements, and then the hunters shall become our prey. Go, my knights, go to Devon Shadow, and prepare for our counter ambush.” he placed a hand on Bellatrix's masked forehead. "You shall lead them. Obey her as you would me my knights.” With a hand wave the anti-apparition wards eased and his followers disapparated.

Like hail on a tin roof the followers of Voldemort apperated with pops around a deserted looking cabin. Bellatrix pointed at the bone white masked knights. “All of you go inside. I want the wards ready to kill anything. Have animation spells on the furniture. I want anyone going in their dead within five seconds.” She gestures for Lucius and the other silver masks. “ We will wait; Once the wards fall, the Order will charge. We hit them in the back, and then they die. I want you two to keep a disapparation and anti-portkey ward up.” She pointed to two of Lord Voldemort‘s liutenants, Avery and another he wasn't sure of. She pointed her wand at overlooking tree, the upper branches forming a solid balcony then levitated herself up to the new platform. A quick tap on her head and she disappeared. Lucius and the other lieutenants following suit.

They waited until near dawn, and then the Order came.

Just as the master had predicted the fools apparated in and then immediately attacked. The Prewett brothers led the charge, one sapping the wards while the other covered, sending dozens of spells to the house windows. The other order members bringing forth shields of magic and levitated stone to protect them. In a few minutes the wards fell, and the mob of blood traitors rushed in.

“Now!” She called, and a few seconds later the apparition and portkey wards came up. Gideon turned to face their flank as Bellatrix and Lucius led the counter charge. Bone-breakers and explosions flew to the knights and they returned spell fire with blood boilers and skin rotters.

Bellatrix fought like a demon, dodging and laughing as her silent spells hammered against the Prewetts combined shield. Lucius cast a shield breaker and quickly regretted it when they both knelt in unison; dodging bellatrix's fusilade and then attacking him. His left arm, lower ribs and thigh splintered under to the assault. He fell back with a crash, his shattered bone splintering further and a strange sound of shattered glass. But that gave Bellatrix time to complete her own assault. Fabian’s blood poured from his eyes and nose before he started convulsing. Gideon retaliated but she put up a mirror shield and his hand bones disintegrated, his wand dropping limply from his hand.

“That was a nasty curse little Prewett.” She teased, stalking over to finish them.

“You and your master are finished. We will flush you from every hole, we will end your terror.” Gideon shouted grabbing his brothers wand with his left hand.

“Avada Kedavra” Her voice sang with hate, Fabian ceased his thrashing.

Her Shield blocked Gideon’s stunner. “ No! The house of Prewett will avenge us!”

“Avada Kedavra” She replied.


Lucius looked up. the pain was excruciating, but the victory was theirs. More concerning to him was the crash of glass. There can only be one thing, and he gently touched the right robe pocket. The irregular shape and jagged sharpness told him everything he needed. The Prewetts had made their decision for him.

“Perfect everyone. Grab your partner and retreat to base.” She cackled

“Mosmorde!”

----
Lucius, with a bubble body charm in conjured hands of glass manipulated the now-empty sphere and handkerchief. The dragon pox had settled into the handkerchief he had wrapped it in, and the clock was truly ticking. The spores were incredibly virulent but only for the next hour. He glanced at his pocket watch: 9:30 a.m. . He then catalogued his injuries. The shattered ribs and humerus were lost causes, the femur would take an hour to fix. Not enough time. He immobilize the femur with a localized body bind, then vanished the ribs and humerus. Skele-Grow was awful, but better than trying to stitch a thousand shards of bone together in his mirror.


The Apparition to Hogwarts took but a moment, as he gingerly walked through the Halls. He found an empty washroom and with great gentleness pulled out the family time turner, so recently removed from goblin care. He turned it 24 times, the most it would go. He then found himself standing behind filch, who was cleaning the door handle to the room. As silently and swiftly as he could be he tapped his head letting the feeling of raw eggs slither down as filch turned. The pathetic squib sniffed before looking around once more and leaving.


Lucius let out of breath and hurried along. It was already 10:02 a.m. He ran, each step agony through his injured leg. Each breath a pathetic heave as his diaphragm had no purchase on his left side. He spotted her then, that dead bird unmistakable. He silenced himself and crept behind Madame Longbottom following behind her into the governors meeting.


Standing in magically enforced silence he watched the childish bickering and ineptitude with scorn. This was the shining example of British wizarding education? He thought of the children, their minds warped by Dumbledore and Bones. He thought of how Bletchley and Longbottom failed to see the importance of there duties. Weasley’s soon to be dead nephews in law. Well soon to be dead at any rate. He pointed his wand at Bletchley’s pocket, her pink handkerchief corner sticking out just enough for the switching spell to take place. A quick color morphing charm and the rust red faded to Pink. He looked at his past self who was oblivious and shook his head. He would have to be more attentive in the future. A scant minute later she flung the handkerchief at Bones. It hit is face and bounced to Weasley feet, who through it back at Bletchley. She grabbed it and threw it at his past self. A half powered arresto momentum slowed it enough for his past self to dodge and current Lucius switch the biological weapon back.


Lucius Malfoy, Acting Chairman, calls meeting to order. 10:07 a.m. Acting vice-chair Madam Longbottom seconds. Madam Longbottom motions for Malfoy to become chairman. No opposition. Chairman Malfoy motions for Longbottom to become Vice chair. No opposition. German Malfoy request a 50% tuition increase, with an additional to 20% for the hospital. Goal is to increase talking and services to help with quarantine for Dragon pox epidemic. Longbottom seconds. Longbottom proposes to remove the term mudblood from all future manutai. Malfoy seconds.

Meeting concludes with moment of silence for the passing of former governors.

 

Plot and Pacing: 2/5
Drags on for far too long. You've got scenes in here which feel pointless and they drag down your story a ton. Lucius talking to Pomfrey, anything to do with Voldemort esp. There's really no reason to establish "hey Lucius is a death eater" because we already know that from canon and you're not doing anything particularly interesting with those scenes. The Prewett scene, on the other hand, didn't feel pointless but instead suffered from poor execution.

And the talks about tuition was dry. Surely there could have been something, anything else for the board to talk about?

Also, I'm pretty sure that's not how time-turners work in canon. You can't change the past with them iirc.

Characters: 3/5

Lucius himself was fine, but every character around him fell flat to me. Not the worst thing in the world given this is supposed to be a character piece about the tragedy (?) of Lucius choosing great evil over great good (savings lives vs serving Voldemort), but without a believable cast to surround him, it just distracts.

Prompt Use: 1/5
The post-combat scene feels disingenuous given your setup. So many ways you could have gone about doing things with a Healer!Lucius. It's for that wasted potential I give you a 1.

Others: 1/5

The minutes of the meeting bit I didn't like. Felt like you were telling instead of showing too much in the story. Multiple lines of dialogue in the same paragraph, and there's a lot of basic grammar and speller errors that make it seem like it's rushed. Which I get, but it really does hurt more than people think. Execution matters more than idea, and your idea was decent even.

The ending also doesn't feel like it has any emotional weight behind it. Everything feels too clinical and unattached and I can't really get invested in the story because Lucius doesn't seem to give a fuck most of the time. Both the action (Prewett fight) and emotional climax (dragon spore assassination) didn't work for me.

Total: 7/20

 

Interesting idea, but I can't find myself being too interested. I can't really place the timeline, and how it fits into the larger picture of canon. Healer Malfoy is definitely unique. I would have liked to have seen more thought put into his whole time turner/poison mission.

I'll give you a pass on the time turner, simply because it served its purpose. Who gives a shit that you're not able to change the past. I think that in Third Year, Harry did just that by summoning his Patronus at the lake, and helping Sirius escape.

Pacing: 2/5 It could have been better, and needed more thought. The bones are there.

Characters: 3/5 They were relatively three dimensional. I don't really like the scenes where people try to show the death eaters currying favor with Voldemort. Because that treads too closely to territory I've never seen done well.

Prompt Use: 3/5 It was abrupt. It was your first line, and then your next very loosely tied into it. And wasn't seen any use of again.

Others: 3/5 on execution. Your grammar didn't stand out to me, and I've said this before, its not my forte. What really hurt this fic was pacing. I feel like you had 30k words of content that you tried to trim down and fit into a smaller story. So you have jittery transitions, and I feel like we missed so much.

If I was going to read this, I'd want more than what you have here. The moral road that Lucius travels when he up and decides that it would be better for him to kill the board as a short term win v. long term goal of curing Dragon Pox seemed a little half thought. There are authors that waste thousands of words on talking about how Lucius plays the long game, I get that he's (apparently) younger here, so his short term v. long term might be skewed, but if he's trying to place himself into a position that would benefit his family. Voldemort isn't going to guarantee that. He seems woefully misinformed, and its contradictory to everything else you laid out in the story.

Over all 11/20.