We aint yelling at him to hurry up and update. Thalarian made a post, Nexus responded. Tinn responded to Nexus's reponse and I responded to Tinn's. You responded to my post, along with theirs, and Now Im responding too yours.

This is me telling which ever Jon is betaing to hurry up. HURRY UP please. I like this fic.

 

I'm hoping the Beta work is hafway finished. This chapter will uber good .

 

Indeed, i agree with above. It really dont matter how long the updates take because we know they will be bigger than most peoples 4 or 5.

 

I was just wondering the original challenge had two scenarios, One being the seven Ladies of Darkness and the Other the seven Ladies of Light, Which scenario did Thalarian chose? Or is he mixing the two?

 

I believe it will be the latter. "Queens of Darkness,Ladies of Light." /nods.

 

yes he is mixing both of them to create one better

 

Nice but the question comes to my mind of what Thalarian will mix up for the ending, The original scenerio had him either becomeing the next dark lord or being the next light side leader. Now with the mix will he just be neutreul?



P.S- Maybe i should just PM him but i'm sure he's flooded with ones like'' When's the next chapter coming???????'' but one more can't hurt.

 

Erm, I wouldn't bother. Why would he give away his glorious ending?

 

Because he cannot resist my poor excuse for written english, no one is safe from bad grammar and spelling!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Thalarian should atleast post which ladies will he going to post and there history

 

He did list the majority of the women to be used in the first chapter. The only two that he didn't were the first two, and we now know one of them is Lilith. As for their histories...that'll come in time.

 

My review from ff.net

Okay, scrap my first review. It's crap. Here's the real one.

I was talking to you last night about how impressed I am with the time you've put into weaving a *three-dimensional* world for Harry. What I mean by that is--well notice how most fics (mine included =[)encase Harry in a bubble. The bubble is a problem because Harry is stifled by repetition and the fic often does not expand far beyond the usual (Hogwarts, the trio, the Malfoy rivalry, Quidditch, the Ministry, the Burrow, Gimmauld Place, Hogsmeade, Diagon Alley perhaps) and there is a limit to how interesting and surprising one can make the same old places we've read about time and again.

Where this fic differs is that not only do you take the time to lay out a many-layered (Vampire tribes, Orc tribes, Myths and legends that most people only vaguely know about, the roles of each of the Order Members, the spies, the Hit-Wizards and bounty hunters, what's going on in Bulgaria and France, and so much more), palpable, *complex* environment for Harry that not only expands the typical bubble he finds himself in, but bursts that shit wide open.

THEN--you bring us to Eden. Have you ever seen the movie Legend? The Dark Crystal? Constantine comes to mind...I can't quite describe how vividly I imagined the world you created there, and that is wholly attributed to your excellent grasp of detail. I *love* details, I will tell anyone. Too often I've seen authors being vague--placing Harry somewhere and not offering a satisfactory glimpse into what he is seeing, feeling, smelling, stepping on, touching, etc etc. I need as much as possible because as the reader *I AM Harry* so as he moves through I move through...and you made me experience his journey through this dark, fascinating world beautifully. The FIGHT SCENES--oh man. *Jealous*, dude I wish I could put together scenes like that. Every move explained and carried out, the effect of each blow, the juicy meat of each one of Harry's small victories in taking down his enemies. My favorite scene (aside from the incredible Church battle--AlbusvsAlberforth and SNAPE'S LAST WORDS!! *shudders with excitement*)had to be the free-fall sequence off the cliff. Fucking awesome.

Lilith. I'm glad you explained about her in your AN at the end of the chapter. I was going to ask you to clarify about her powers/why she was in Eden. I have no complaints about her seduction of Harry or the way you wrote the Succubi. I think of that scene in Bram Stoker's Dracula (one of the only times Keanu Reeves didn't make the other actors around him look like fools because of his horrid acting) when Jonathan is seduced by Dracula's bitches. First of all, not many people can write "smut" and I'll read it without rolling my eyes. I was engrossed--totally eating up every word of that shit. That was because of the ancient, ethereal, devilish way these beings were written, and because of my excitement about the chapter leading up to it, and that is what makes it work: that the journey into his eventual (and delicious if I may be naughty for a minute) rape was so engaging that the transition was almost seamless.

And when the tables turned...God I don't think I've ever been this attracted to a fictional character before--when Harry showed that bitch who was boss...perfectly written. I read it twice. Okay three times, but stfu don't laugh at me.

So since I've spent the majority of this review stroking your ego, let me say that since this story is so epically written, little flaws like incorrect spelling and accidentally omitted words stand out. I know you are probably anxious to get out each update, since they take so long to write, but think of this way: we have been waiting this long, and I don't think we're going anywhere any time soon, so take your time and make sure everything is right. Trust me, I know--I am re-editing Lessons now because of it.

Also...I don't know why people feel the need to write Luna's accent. I know, Hagrid and others like Dobby get this treatment, but for some reason when people do it for her it jumps on my nerves. It's hard to really focus on what she is saying because I'm having to translate it, seriously. Perhaps that' just my own hang up, but I just thought I'd mention it.

I've not read many Lilly/James last stand scenes, but this one was only really good for me when Voldemort arrived and the fight in the kitchen got under way. /me shrugs, I don't know, I'm just not interested in happy happy Potter family stuff. Though, I *did* really like the Lilly scene you sent me. Her grief/fear/determination was excellently written.


I don't think I've ever read a fic with such a unique approach to Harry's journey towards Voldemort's defeat (not to mention Voldemort's own journey to power). Everything, each character, the mechanics of the war they are losing, and the other world of mythic, powerful women who will become Harry's servants, is superbly written. Granted, I don't read many fics now a days but that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Oh yeah, and...ZOMG!! Update soon k, thanks!!

 

haven't the betaing finished??? it is been weeks.

 

Well here's an update so everyone is on the same page.

The beta'ing was finished. But some unfortunate real life issues killed the chapter and upon re-reading I, and he reluctantly, realised how terrible the writing was. Even though I was writing it, nothing flowed well and I seemed to just rush the entire thing simply to get it done. Heart wasn't in it really.

So I've gone back, done a major overhaul over the entire chapter and am putting on the finishing touches.

Chapter 2 is now ranging at 41,523 words. A few scenes might be snipped out as they can be saved for later, but that's the word count as of this exact moment.

For those that are already groaning about the length, there are Chapter Markers in the chapter itself, which you can use as a 'bookmark' to leave off and and come back at a later time without losing your spot and having to search for it again.

I am sorry about the delay but I would rather take the time to get it right than just release shit for the sake of getting an update out there.

EDIT: Much love to K for an awesome and detailed review, as well as a hearty thank you to everyone that's reviewed and to those providing support and help. I really can't say how embarassed I am that this chapter is still unreleased.

 

Thanks for the good news Thalarian. Don't be embarrassed by the time between updates; it shows a kind of weakness that can be exploited later by impatient fans. Do you really want to bear your throat to the lions in this pit.

Oh yeah, fanboy time, I really enjoy this story your average chapter length dwarfs over ninety percent of the fanfiction stories in existence. Harry is neither a coward nor an idiot and while powerful he's not received the random power-up so common in stories featuring a darker Harry. I look forward to the explanation of Voldemort's choices. The only thing that bugs me is sexually-deviant-Deatheaters and thats only because its an annoying cliche that doesn't make since to me. The average pureblood seems like a blue blooded elitist snob that would probably not condone such actions for them being "undignified for someone from the proud <insert Name> line" but its a minor bitch and hardly distracts from the general greatness of this story. Still looking forward to your finished version of Chapter 2.

 

I've got to agree with Greengun. Don't sweat the release time. I don't know about anybody else, but as long as I know you're not dead and at least planning to work on the fic, I can wait as long as I have to.

That said, could we hope for an update within a few weeks? I might be willing to share a few pics of Rider should the answer be affirmative. ^_^

What, trying to bribe the author? Who? Moi?...dunno what you're talking about *shifty glance* XP

 

Thal I gotta idea. Call JK and tell her to forget her verison yours is MUCH LONGER and probably better. 41.5k words thats a book in itself.

 

Yeah, I imagine that would go over real well with Scholastic and Warner Brothers. Not to mention JK: "Listen, I realize that you came up with the basic idea for this story, and I appreciate that, but after the last book you wrote, I've decided that you don't deserve author priveleges. Sorry. I will be continuing the story as an NC-17. Good day, ma'am and thanks for all the fish."

But that's neither here nor there. Don't worry yourself over the length of the chapter - I'll just pretend that I got a lucky break and recieved three chapters on accident.

I just read this story last night (my back even hurts for jumping on the bandwagon so hard) and I have to say, if there is any room on your figurative nutsack left, I'd gladly take up residence. Most definitely my favorite NC-17 story out there, and that's saying something.

Much love, and keep up the GREAT work.

 

Thal, don't sweat the length or the time. I would much rather have a product of quality, than something thrown hastily together simply to appease the rabid fans. I believe this chapter will put your story's length above 100K? In only 3 chapters, that is an astounding acomplishment, especially as this is your first fanfiction. After some practice with the fanfiction world, I think you should write an original story. You have already proven to me you have the characterization skills necessary for it, and I can guarantee I would buy your books.