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Questions about YOUR FANFIC that don't deserve their own thread...

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by Ched, Aug 3, 2013.

  1. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter

    Jan 6, 2009
    Hey there! Rather than quote I'm just going to insert my comments after yours. Yours are in blue.

    Harry's parents are murdered by Voldemort at one point, and he ends up being raised by (still thinking about that). Either way, he and Neville grow up as close friends.

    Given where you're going with the rest of this I'd suggest Sirius, honestly. Sirius could be his canon self but just being raised by a Black he'd have access to things (and maybe people) who might not outright encourage him to go dark but would provide tools. Even if Harry is never encouraged to be dark/evil just the fact that a lot of the Blacks (other than Sirius) and their possessions aren't really encouraging him to be good either might help you out with characterization.

    Neville watches as his friend, who has always been a bit more radical than he, not so slowly spirals down in a path of violence. He understands that the Dark Lord of the prophecy was not Voldemort, but Harry.
    That understanding is "the power he knows not".

    Here's where you sort of lose me. Why does Neville suddenly understand this? I'm willing to buy that Neville comes to this conclusion but reading your two options below it sounds like you are are planning to have Neville get things sorted out before Harry ever has a chance to become what the prophecy is referring to. Therefore the prophecy isn't fulfilled (in my mind). If your story is going to hinge so much on prophecy shenanigans that seems a bit like a cheat.

    Either option 1 or 2 can work for me but it's the above that isn't working for me at the moment. Neville stopping Harry before he becomes the Dark Lord he has to stop is not what the prophecy says? Or maybe it could be interpreted that way - just be aware you want to have this nailed down in-story for it to work.

    One thing I am very out of options is how to have the Longbottoms defy Harry three times - I'm thinking of them opposing his joining the order while he's still very young, and then opposing his post-Voldemort killing spree, but those sound kinda lame, especially the second.

    I expect this to be the least of your problems. These instances of defying Harry haven't got to be in grand combat but things like defying him the right to join the order. Not just oppose it - but actually be the reason he doesn't join as young as he wants to. Saying "oppose" is wimping out, give it teeth. They stop him going on his post-Voldemort killing spree, and he misses out completely on the one raid/whatever he wanted to go on the most. He gets around them later and joins the people out killing the Death Eaters, but they still stopped him the first time. The third time could be more flat-out Neville vs Harry and you could tie into Neville's revelation about Harry being the Dark Lord from the prophecy - Neville defies Harry in something, realizes the path Harry is treading, and these events lead to Neville's realization of what the prophecy really means.
    Edit: Could Neville's "power he knows not" be more like... visions or flashes of the future or something? That's dumb and a power-up we didn't have in canon, but that could be how he discovers that Harry is the one who will turn into the Dark Lord he is prophesized to defeat. I just don't like the idea of giving Neville a power like that when it's not remotely in canon, but I like the idea of it. Could be more than a hindrance than a help even, just one that eventually leads him to that understanding?
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2019 at 12:30 AM