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Questions about YOUR FANFIC that don't deserve their own thread...

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by Ched, Aug 3, 2013.

  1. Joe's Nemesis

    Joe's Nemesis High Score: 2,058 ~ Prestige ~

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    Sequel: rewrite. The original was good, and stands the test of time for the most part. I'll have to give it a read again, but if I remember right, there's a whole lot of story left to be told.
     
  2. wordhammer

    wordhammer Dark Lord DLP Supporter

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    I'm with Cheddar that you can tie Harry into the moment with more sensory info- 'Harry hid in the shadow of a brick chimney, concealed from sight and the heat of the afternoon sun...'

    My problem with the description is that Diagon Alley is tucked amidst downtown London, and fashioned like pre-industrial London construction where straight lines and open walkways weren't common. The idea of a house with a yard and trees stuck in the middle of all that just doesn't... fit.


    EDIT: Sesc corrected my geography error; just ignore me. Must've been more tired than I thought.
     
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2014
  3. Odran

    Odran Fourth Champion

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    Probably because there's so many fanfics where Goblins are helpful and respectful towards wizards and witches. I really wonder what the fuck inspired that in the first place.
     
  4. Warlocke

    Warlocke Fourth Champion

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    Ask Me Anything.
     
  5. Photon

    Photon Order Member

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    Is there a reason why they would reveal it by not apparating?

    Also, it seems that "Either" should be "either".
     
  6. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    @wordhammer: Hog's Head. That implies Hogsmeade, not Diagon Alley.
    Sure, because I had the same revelation when I read or heard years ago that "writing is the art of mapping all of our senses onto one" (or something to that effect) :p You don't think about it usually, but that's exactly what you're doing for the reader: turning every sense into something perceived by their eyes.

    As for the scene, if you want more atmo: The feeling of the chimney against his back or the shingles(?) of the roof under his hands, bracing himself, the smell of food drifting up (it's a restaurant, after all); the wind, the temperature, the weather, his reaction to either/all (freezing, sweating, ...), his inner state (nervous, anxious, excited, ...), some random details of the immediate surroundings (a bird's nest on the roof, some sort of moss on the shingles, a cracked shingle), something weird/magick-y, something happening in the distance, ...

    Be careful not to overdo it, if you want to convey any sort of urgency, though. I could easily blow up that snippet to pages talking about nothing but the roof, the house and the street, and any action-y feeling would be out of the window. Perhaps make a list of what his hiding place is like, including all details, also what is happening around him and how it affects him, and the pick the two highlights.

    As a side note if you want exact Canon compliance, the Hog's Head itself already is in a side street. You reach it by crossing a good part of the village from the castle, including passing by the Three Broomsticks, and then turning left IIRC. Here's a link (I don't agree with all conclusions, but it's helped me find my own layout for the village).


    @Pers: I'd only rewrite the old stuff if it really bothers you. Otherwise, just write the new stuff and improve that to your liking. It's more rewarding, or at least it is for me.
     
  7. wolf550e

    wolf550e High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

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    Ask Me Anything, an interview thread on reddit (http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/).

    EDIT: Oh wow, I should check the timestamp before replying.
     
  8. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    Well, in your specific case, I'd say go for a rewrite if you think you'd enjoy doing it.

    In most cases I'd suggest writing something else, something new.

    But you have already got a reasonably large body of work (both fanfic and original). It might be that you'd benefit from rewriting your fanfic and polishing your skills that way, so you can do it for your novels/novellas in the future.

    I expect there's a difference in doing the standard editing we all do and doing an actual rewrite. Probably a worthwhile experience.
     
  9. ScottPress

    ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

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    Now I want to see dat rewrite, Pers. And the sequel too.
     
  10. AlbusPHolmes

    AlbusPHolmes The Alchemist

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    In my own humble opinion I think it'd be better if you simply started something new. It's more likely than not that you'll grow tired of rewriting the old stuff as a lot of it will feel like treading old ground (albeit it with new, better shoes), and any improvements are still likely to be lost under the core story, which has already been told.

    Starting something from scratch should however allow all those creative juices to flow a lot better, and there's a lot of room for different directions and plots to unwind however you will. Rewriting the old stuff will be a bit constrictive - to use a road metaphor, yes, you can choose to skip or prance or dance or gallop down the story path, but the path is still one you've walked before, and you wont be allowed to deviate a lot from the underlying story structure. If telling the old story better is all you seek, then that's fine, but I and most other readers will read it knowing they've read it all before, only now has fancy bells and whistles. And to be perfectly honest your old stuff is good enough that it doesn't need any extensive revamping. I think I'd much rather enjoy something new.

    Okay, now I think I'm rambling. Tl; dr I think it'd be better to start something new.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2014
  11. Joe's Nemesis

    Joe's Nemesis High Score: 2,058 ~ Prestige ~

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    Let me clarify, Pers.

    When I said rewrite, I meant the second story, as in tossing it, but maybe saving a couple ideas and then writing an entirely new story. Basically, everything we wish would happen with Star Wars Episodes 1, 2, 3.
     
  12. Zeelthor

    Zeelthor Scissor Me Timbers

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    If Dresden was to flee from the entire white council, where would be the smartest option?
     
  13. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    Deep Faerie? Somewhere like Arctis Tor. He's the Winter Knight now, it'd be daft to follow him there.

    Not likely a permanent solution, as living in Faerie might ramp up his transition into the "Winter Knight" in a way he doesn't like, but short-term... yeah.

    Similarly he could bunker down in the prison beneath Demonreach, but given that those defenses are for larger things than individual mortal wizards... they might have a better shot at being a thorn in Harry's side there.
     
  14. DC

    DC Groundskeeper

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    How does go about writing about places they've never visited, or about situations when their character is in a foreign country the author has never been to? Sticking to what I do know isn't working out, because I'm not well-travelled at all.
     
  15. ScottPress

    ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

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    Do you mean: author hasn't been there, but the character has, or the character is also a newcomer? In either case, I assume some research would suffice. Unless you're planning to write about that place in extreme detail, what you can pick up from the internet and travel guides should be enough.
     
  16. AlbusPHolmes

    AlbusPHolmes The Alchemist

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    For fanfiction I've always just made up stuff, really. It makes for fun worldbuilding, and I can arrange things to perfectly suit what I need. Mostly because the locales I have my characters visit are vague/unimportant enough, and I tend to spend more time describing the building they might be entering or the spot they might be headed to, and throw in a few generic details like weather, trees, cars, people, etc to paint the environs. Most readers gloss over such details in a hurry to get into the thick of the story anyway.

    However if you're doing original fiction, or you want your character visiting a definite real life location, say the Marriott Hotel in New York, a simple Google image/maps/street search should be enough to provide details to confer a heftier sense of realism.
     
  17. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    This sentence, from my new fic, is awkward:

    I want to describe both inhalation (cold in the lungs) and exhalation (mist), but as it is the repetition of breath in/breath out doesn't work. Ideas? (Using the words "exhalation" and "inhalation" sounds too scientific).
     
  18. ScottPress

    ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

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    If something doesn't work, it usually helps if I try to find a simpler alternative to avoid awkward wording:

    How's that? Stuff in [] proposed to add some extra flavor.

    Is this a HP/Frozen xover, the 19th century Hogwarts you once mentioned? :sherlock:
     
    Last edited: Jun 11, 2014
  19. Sesc

    Sesc Slytherin at Heart Moderator

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    I've come to the conclusion that with the tools you have (web, especially google Streetview) research actually can substitute travelling there 100% -- unless the place is very obscure.

    So that's your answer @OP: Streetview to walk through the area if it's a city, and travel descriptions of hikes or whatever from blogs, magazines, ... if it's countryside. Additionally, sites about local history (every village has those) for background information, and topographical maps for getting an overview of the area.

    I did this for e.g. St Tropez, and after I was finished with my research, I knew the names of bars at the harbour, the colour of chairs outside of a restaurant on the wayside, when the market was open and where you were likely to get stuck in a traffic jam. And I hadn't been there in my life -- that's where the internet really shines.


    @Taure: You could always use breath only once. The air was painfully cold in his lungs, and his breath misted in front of him .... Or any other combination. Also, I don't think it's sounds too scientific ... Breathing in filled his lungs with almost painfully cold air, condensing into a fine trail of mist in front of him as soon as he exhaled or something or another, but that's just me.
     
  20. Zennith

    Zennith Pebble Wrestler ~ Prestige ~

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    Honestly, all I'm trying to figure out is if it makes sense to continue with fics I haven't updated in years (I'm trying to get back into the game) or start up something new. Blagh.
     
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