Its going to be Sophie. I mean wtf kind of flying pokemon cant fly?

 

Updated. And with a hell of a cliffhanger, too.

 

Awesome ending to the chapter. Just overtook The Sun Soul as my favorite Pokemon fic.

 

Spoiler

Loki, Scar, and Lacey are alive. Don't really care about the rest, cool.

 

Wow, didn't see that coming at all.

Spoiler

glad to see Scar, Lacey, and Loki are alright though

I can't wait for the next chapter now though.

 

I love this damn fic. Great update.

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While it sucks that Erra's probably the one who got killed, I was relieved to see Lacey, Loki and Scar alive and massacre-y. The Mia plot twist I didn't see coming, mostly because it kinda feels like something out of a bad action movie, but whatevs. If it works, it works. Have to wait 'til next chapter to judge.

Oh, and calling it now: our protagonist is well on his way to going full-blown John Crichton crazy. Should be fun.

 

He's up shit creek, that's for sure. I'm not sure how he's going to escape from this, especially given that he

Spoiler

just massacred around two-thirds of the gym.

They simply can't let him walk away alive now.

 

Calling it now, he gets out by

Spoiler

Deus ex Lacey. Anyone else notice the line

? And Lacey already seems to know a bit about the future, judging by that one scene where she remarked there were things he didn't need to know.

 

Eh, I don't like this fic that much. Part of it is probably the adjustment to the OC, but he just feels bitchier than a trained soldier would be. 4/5 because it's still mad well written.

 

I think most of his personality change is because of his pokemon. At least thats what Im getting from the story. He keeps remarking about how before timetraveling he would have killed any of his pokemon on sight, or on a whim because they would be weapons and what not. But now he sees them as friends and worries about them.

His character is changing.

Also, 4/5. -1 because its not done yet and I want moar.

 

Updated.

Spoiler

I was Sophie's ball

Well he gets away with Mia still on his side. Strangely now he somehow has doubts thinking the gym maybe the 'good guys'... ends justify the means? I suppose he would accept that pretty easily. Most surprisingly of all is the drugged Erra; an improvement?

 

Another solid chapter.

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Shame about Sophie. I would've personally killed off Xander or something, but killing off Sophie and making Erra drug-addled batshit is a good enough trade-off.

It's nice that Mia got some development, because I didn't quite know what to make of her before and she's a little less random now. Kinda wished she hadn't of gotten traumatised like that to do it, but it's probably a "dark-and-gritty" pre-requisite to have a main female character get used for sex along the way.

Oh, and as for the poison gym guys being potentially good guys, I think it's a morally grey thing and the perspective we're watching from changes things, but either way, if the poison gym group were the good guys in a way, then it only adds to the list of things that'll no doubt cause the apocalypse, combined with a dead Elite 4 member, a dead champion, the virus outbreaks... And it's nearly all the main guy's fault! What fun.

 

Whaaaat?

Spoiler

"Hey Mia," I said groggily. "You alright?"

She laughed quickly. Hollowly. "Loaded question. But yeah, I suppose I'm fine."

I decided the wisest course of action was to avoid any potentially lethal topics of conversation. Fine was a danger word, after all.

"Your poké balls not working?" I guessed. "It seems to be happening a lot. I can't recall anything." Even as I said it I grabbed Xander's poké ball and tried to recall him again. It failed and he glared bloody murder at me for trying to stop him from defending me.

"That's not it," Mia told me. "Well, that is happening, but that's not why I rang you. You remember that I was a bit weird with you in Rustboro?"

I nodded superfluously. "Yeah, but I can't really blame you for that."

"I'm still sorry for it," she said. "I just… I found out something that day that really knocked me for six."

I felt worry punch me straight in the gut. "You're alright, aren't you? Was it those tests? Did you… did you well, catch something?"

There was a sigh. "In a manner of speaking. I just… I don't know what to do. I just needed to talk, just to try and figure out what the hell I'm supposed to do."

The tone of her voice made me lean forwards subconsciously. "Why, what's wrong?"

I could hear her take a breath before she spoke. I knew it was going to be something heavy.

What she said still shocked me speechless though.

"I'm pregnant."

Dunno if I want to read this fic after last chapter.

 

...Lol.

And I just killed you on hard mode.

 

Latest chapter... Wow. Waiting to see the repercussions of what he did but it should be good.

 

I haven't really liked the last few chapters, it seems too many of the bad things happening are entirely due to him holding the idiot ball, rather than any sort of activity by the villain(s) in the story.

 

The last chapter just seemed as though he's setting it up for the protagonist to become this martyr who's probably gonna die at the end

I mean

Spoiler

His starter has died, one of his friends who know the truth about him may be dead (she could've been held up or some bullshit if the author doesn't want her to die) and his only other friend is already on the outs with him. If Mia does die, this will push Ayd further from him.

 

I'm still loving it. Glad to see that...

Spoiler

The author had the balls to kill off Xander, and maybe Mia too. Xander's death > Pikachu's in The Sun Soul, at least.

 

THERE ARE SPOILERS BELOW

So, I finally finished reading this fic... I'm not sure what to think really.

On one hand, it's excellently written, there's extremely good character progression (some of the best i've ever seen actually) and the plot moves on very nicely, there's an excellent sense that time is running out, and he has to do something before it's too late. The only real issue I have with the fic writing wise is character consistency and slightly illogical proceedings. Sometimes the protagonist seems to go against even his own code of honor. Alistair's departure also seemed quite illogical, if he could read minds, surely he understood that the protagonist did not intend for what happened.

On the other hand, I have moral issues with this fic. I mean, shit like in that gym where he killed everyone? That's understandable. Shit like blowing up that building and only feeling bad about it when he realized that Mia was inside? Not so cool. There's just no real consistency in who he kills, and how he kills them. His plan to find a trainer with a psychic, use it to understand why Lacey killed Ayd's pokemon, then 'dispose' of both the trainer and the pokemon afterwards seems to go clearly against the morals he displayed when Ayd killed the person who he thought killed Lucy.

Basic consensus from me is that it's technically very well written, but I just can't bring myself to identify/relate to the protagonist. I'm unsure if I will continue reading, though I get the feeling that the end of the story isn't too far away, so I may just finish it. Either way, I'm leaning between 3/5 from a personal perspective, and 4/5 from a library perspective.

 

(I'm new here, so forgive me if I'm not supposed to post here, whether it's due to the old age of this thread or something else.)

Well, what can I say, really? This thread has been left alone for quite awhile, but the fic itself hasn't. It has had major developments since I've read it.

New characters introduced (at least one human and one major Pokémon off the top of my head), the main character gets a rather unwanted... thing (nope I'm not gonna tempt you with spoilers), and someone important dies.

I've been missing the main character's Pokémon in the latest chapters, though.