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Rorscharch Blot's rather neat dribble/idea

Discussion in 'Fanfic Discussion' started by ip82, Feb 6, 2006.

  1. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

    Joined:
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    This is a small dribble that Rorscharch Blot (author of Make a Wish) posted on his Yahoo!Group, but I found it hillarious and interesting. I figured it'd be a shame to let it go to waste, so I decided to post it here. Someone should really take this on and extend it a bit - nothing too fancy, just make it into a real fic.

    So here it is, Rorscharch Blot's work, not mine:

    * * * * *

    OMAKE - What if Harry really was an incurably criminal boy?

    "Fire," Harry screamed in joy as he watched the Dursley house burn.
    "Ahahahahahahaha."

    Harry's Hogwarts letter came as it did in the past time line . . .
    sort of. This one was addressed, room 3c secure ward, St. Bad Brain's
    Hospital for the Dangerously Criminally Insane: Abandon all hope ye
    who enter here.

    At the Sorting . . .

    "GET HIM OFF ME," the Hat screamed in fear. "Oh god why would you
    allow something like him to exist?"

    "I heard the Hat say Gryffindor," Dumbledore looked around. "Did
    anybody else hear the hat say Gryffindor."

    And the first day of charms class . . .

    "There are charms that make fire?" Harry ran to the front of the class
    and clapped like a child . . . a criminally insane child. "Teach me,
    teach me, teach me."

    Getting the Philosopher's stone . . .

    "BURN PLANT BURN," Harry cried out joyfully as he tested out his new
    spells. "Bwahahaha."

    The first confrontation with Voldemort . . .

    "I can burn people to death with my hands?" Harry's face lit up with
    joy, "dreams do come true."

    And the meeting with Dumbledore . . . .

    "What are you doing Harry?" The Headmaster looked at the boy that kept
    slapping his arm.

    "Why did I have to get something I always wanted and then have it
    ripped away?" Harry looked at his hand in profound disappointment. "Ah
    well, burn you old man burn."

    The End . . .

    Not going to do any more of this, just an omake that popped into my
    head and is now gone. On your heads be it.


    * * * * *

    Any takers?
     
  2. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran Golden Patronus Admin

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    Rofl. That's awesome. I'd like it to be more serious though, ya know? I like humor and all but I reckon if someone actually did a Crimmie!Harry it'd rock. Bad ass Harry, lol.
     
  3. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Yeah, there are few mafia!Harry stories around, but they all feel exactly the same as vampyre!Harry in almost every way.

    I'm not sure about criminal!Harry, in a way of sophisticated thief or a dark wizard, but more like... crazy cleptoman/piroman, like he's portrayed in this dribble... maybe a bully and junky too...

    It'd be fun, but not as a serious story, I think. 20,30k tops.
     
  4. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran Golden Patronus Admin

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    yeah, thats what I mean. Those mafia ones are annoying.

    A slightly unhinged pyro with an attitude problem sounds better. He shouldnt be too over the top though, it should be realistic. I mean, if he sets a student on fire he's going to get in trouble, big trouble. Not just a little slap on the wrist.
     
  5. Giovanni

    Giovanni God of Scotch

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    And they always turn into sensitive harry as well... Seriously, a criminally insane harry would be hilarious.
     
  6. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Would he really get in trouble?

    Or would Dumbledore cover his every blunder to keep him from getting expelled?

    Interesting part of this story could be a description of Dumbledore with bags under his eyes and wory lines on his face, running after Harry and cleaning his messes... or just making sure he takes his medication.
     
  7. DGD

    DGD Headmaster

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    Yeah, this would be sweet if someone continued it.