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Sh*t Students Write

Discussion in 'The Humor Mill' started by Ched, May 10, 2011.

0/5, 0 votes
  1. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    May 10, 2011 #1
    Shit my Students Write

    Reasonably funny all around, though I wouldn't call it downright hilarious. A few examples:

    "The rebel and onion armies showed grose negligence by having many of their battles right inside national parks, like Gettysburg."

    ‎"Its not really plagiarism as it was exactly what I was going to write anyway."

    "Patriarchy: A belief that one should serve your country."

    "Would eradication of malaria even help us become healthier and more productive worldwide- equal opportunity is important but how do we make progress without making population conditions worse?"

    "The Black Panther Party believed that racism man black men look weak toward women because a black woman could get a job faster than a black man. The Black Panther Pary felt that this made men go out and commit crimes and turn to the drugs in the black community."

    ~Those aren't the best ones, but they aren't bad, and I got tired of looking back through 13 pages or so trying to find specific ones I had liked.
     
    Last edited: May 11, 2011
    JimmyCranberry
  2. Rubicon

    Rubicon High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

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    May 11, 2011 #2
    My favorite: "Sometimes, people are born with ambitious genitalia."
     
  3. Iztiak

    Iztiak Prisoner DLP Supporter

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    May 11, 2011 #3
    They'd be funnier with a bit of context.
     
    Alindrome
  4. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    May 11, 2011 #4
    Agreed, actually. It'd be nice to have just 1-2 sentences explaining the situation.
     
  5. coleam

    coleam Death Eater

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    May 11, 2011 #5
    This one made me facepalm:

     
  6. Provis

    Provis Second Year

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    May 11, 2011 #6
    If you're a member of Delta Tau Chi it was the Germans that bombed Pearl Harbor...
     
  7. Euro

    Euro Sixth Year DLP Supporter

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    May 11, 2011 #7
    This one made me laugh:

    Nice find CheddarTrek...
     
  8. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    May 11, 2011 #8
    Actually, I don't feel the need, since I've been reading stupid shit like that from papers turned in to my wife for years now. I'm going to send the link to her; maybe she'll add a few of the more ridiculous ones she receives.
     
  9. ASmallBundleOfToothpicks

    ASmallBundleOfToothpicks Professor

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    May 12, 2011 #9
    So true.

    The advancement of the Human Being is so awe-inspiring that I went to eat some 'plants and meats' so that I could better understand my stone-age brothers. Unfortunately, the restaurants didn't have any plants, only some vegetables and fruits. They still had meats though.


    Definitive proof that multitasking is so important.

    The sheer amount of relevant information in this sentence is astounding.

    Optimism at its finest. Someone has clearly read up on Buddhism. Or just failed at using spell-check.

    ... Wow. I don't even-

    WTF? This is my thesis! Goddammit! I'm going to fucking murder my fucking professor! I didn't want this leaked- :awesome
     
  10. wordhammer

    wordhammer Dark Lord DLP Supporter

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    May 12, 2011 #10
    Perfectly good replacement thesis, ready and waiting for you.

    'As a cooperative effort towards reaching great moments of achievement, society is very much like the sex I had last night...'
     
  11. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    May 13, 2011 #11
    Relevant:
    [​IMG]
     
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