Hey anolfrik

you forgot to mention his mangling of the english language, bothe grammatically and semantically. (in other words spelling and his sentence structure and use of comma's)

As to the gay/slash thing..its normally a set thing that such stories are marked as such..this wasn't and thats where people complain.

and as you try and generalize men..I'll generalize women, who all like to watch men doiing things to other men..and who nag..and who are over the top winghers etc..there will always be exceptions

and mark stories for what they contain, and no I aint into abuse/rape/pedo stories at all..all those females who write about Harry and Snape..frpm 3rd year up..that is sick..a 13/14 year old boy with a 30 plus year old man...oh yucko

ThunderGod
:banana:

 

I am very glad for the slash marking, I just cannot understand that all the tough guys go all out icky over some barly mentioned touching and make this into a slash ranting instead of writing about the story itself.
There is a lot to 'say' about this story. And "touching Neville" in one or two sentences is hardly comparable to some others I wish I hadnt even read the summary of.

And to the fangirl stories, well... I think we have an agreement over these. There seem to be a lot of 15 year old girls around. I wonder if someone ever tried to map the age and sex of the writer/readers to the topic. But that is for another day and possibly for another thread.

Anolfrik

 

hmm..oh yeah..okay the manhandling of a stranger...thats what got me..not the fact it was slash (well a little since I didn't see any warning that any molestation was going to take place)..and to be blunt its part of the whole story..even 2 lines can change the tone of any story

eg
Harry pulled his wand out and with a evil look sent a reducto at Malfoy, blowing a hole in his chest. Laughing maniacally as he sauntered over to his one time nemisis, Harry spat on the body.

tell me does those 2 sentences tone a story for you?

now for the same sentences done differently

Harry reluctantly pulled his wand, ducking down for cover as a spell went over his head. Quickly replying with a reducto, aiming at Malfoys wand hand, he watched as the spell impacted on Malfoys chest. Harry stood over Draco's body, his tears dripping as he realized he had killed him

same information done differently can set a tone of a story

I hate Fangirls with overactive hormones:}

ThunderGod
:banana:

ps I am still trying to write my many fic ideas down..writers block sucks..am surprised I was able to write those 2 paragraphs without blocking

 

just read this i don't relly like slash so i droped the story it great but i would rather it with out the slash the one part of it i like ws the fact that the old bumblebee should have told harry the him about the prophecy strait away by acient law like told in this story instead he waited as fa as i'am concerned he he told the truth straitaway harry mi9ght have goten of his lazy arse and killed the basterd in the graveyard but overall good story except the slash.

 

There is a diffrence between slash with a warning and out of the blue Harry feeling up a stranger. Whether or not it turned out to be Neville. There was no slash marking on the story when a lot of people started reading it. And its more the slash propaganda then anything else. It was like an entire chapter of repeating i'm a person not a potion dont label me shit.

 

That's it! I just cannot read that anymore. It started not so bad, but now the ferret is crying into his shoulder. I give up!

And the propaganda is not only with the slash stuff, but he is walking around like the messia, preaching all sorts of wisdoms....

It makes me sick.

 

I totally agree with anolfrik, this has a hodge podge of different beliefs mixed in a random order...this needs a rewrite , an editor and at least 3 betas..and then maybe it will be worth reading..

ThunderGod

hmmm..smilies are reacting badly


:banana :whipped

 

I actually liked this story before. I just can't read it anymore. It was not that bad when it started.

 

Yeah, it started pretty alright, it still needed a beta dn an editor..but you could see the promise it had..then it started degrading into..well a mosh pit of opera and rap fans *shudder* (they don't mix well)..then he added the heavy metal fans and it got ugly in there

ThunderGod
:banana:

 

Don't know about you guys but the slash in the recent chapters has been minimal, its a brilliant fic in my opinion and the chapter update a major reason for that. Also the killing of Death Eaters was taken care of with a rather refreshing idea of blowing up their houses, the author is clearly talented.

 

Yeah, this fic is substandard IMHO. While it started interestingly enough, suddenly I found myself bombarded with ancient goddesses, Harry being a supergenius specializing in magical discoveries and theory, secret government organizations and a lot of other drivel. Harry has turned into a half-bird, half-man creature spreading ancient wisdom and doing the "wise druid" routine, Draco is not only redeemed, but turned into Harry's bitch and an utter pussy one at that, and apparently every single person in Hogwarts is omnisexual.

I had to stop reading, because if I saw "Labels are for potions, not people" one more time, I was going to do something drasticly painful to the nearest living creature. I'm sure my grandmother would have been distinctly unamused.

 

I stopped reading a while ago. Had to force myself to finish the chapter, not because of the "slash" or anything, it just got rather repetative and boring. Once that happens, I close the window and never return. It has it's good parts, but it needs some serious editing to ever be considered "Great".

 

Slash wasn't the main reason I stopped following this story.

It's the simple fact that the author of this story is a BAD writer - and I mean 'writer', as in person who writes down stuff using easily understandable English language, not a person who can think of great ideas and plots.

I'm usually not the one to bitch about grammar, but this goes beyond simple spelling mistakes, and into the area of sentence structure and general plot flow. However interesting her ideas might be, having to mentally decompose each sentence into basic statements and them reassemble them into something vaguely understandable, completely ruins any kind of enjoyment I might get from this story.

Add to that Harry who's constantly feeling other guys up, while repeating some lame self-righteous slogan for the 100th time, and you get my level of frustration going into the red zone, resulting in me clicking the close button and finding something else to read.

 

Its as if every character is high, stupid or in a different plane of reality.

They all...talk...like ...this.

Except, non of them finish a thought.

"So I was..no, not really...well, maybe it could...yesterday...I'll tell you later..."

They all even trail off when they did finish a thought. Every character too! It isn't like there is one "Luna-like" character who is spacey. They all suffer from brain damage.

 

Yeah, that really bothered me, especially in later chapters where I was waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to finish one single sentence expressing a complete and coherent thought, possibly even relating to the plot. It never happened.

What the hell?

 

mm I would actually put this story in the "unrecomended" section.

Such horrible grammar <shudders>

 

I thought this story was well done and also find it quite entertaining. I can’t weight to find out what happens next.

 

cool story worth looking at.

 

^...Really?

 

Oooh! One-liner posts

Edit: Sod it, I feel too guilty to leave one-liner posts ^^;

Bugger. Now I have to attempt to write something vaguely relevant to the topic.
First things first - the characters in the story are about as good at English as the author is. Really pathetic. They can barely string a sentence together, and they appear to pause for a few seconds before actually saying something. Think Tony Blair, and you've hit the nail.

There really isn't that much to add from what the others have said, but I've trying to decide whether I could even prefer EmoAngst!Harry to this self-righteous bitch of a character, who is seemingly a fucking saint. The author has torn the character to pieces, and then set it flame. Highly unrecommended, but hey, at least the author is trying.