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Complete Team 7's Ascension by Eilyfe -T- Naruto

Discussion in 'Naruto' started by Pasta Sentient, Jan 31, 2014.

  1. Jarik

    Jarik Chief Warlock

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    I thought there was a bit too much Asuma bashing this chapter. Like sure, Kakashi has obviously chosen a different, accelerated training regime for his team and sure, they probably kick ass. But I didn't think it was necessary to make Asuma out to be an incompetent, naive jounin instructor to show how far Team 7 has come.

    Also noticed that we barely see any interaction with Team 10 at all this chapter - we're told about it, but aren't shown it. Dunno whether the author is intentionally trying to make a point about how irrelevant the other characters have become to Team 7, or whether the author was just being lazy.
     
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2014
  2. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Even in canon, Team 10 is the shittiest of the genin teams. There was no bashing in this chapter.
     
  3. Mutton

    Mutton Unspeakable

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    The only difference between Asuma here and Kakashi in canon is that Asuma here didn't catch onto the bait and switch right away; I think the author was trying to make a point about favoritism along with Asuma and Sarutobi's estranged relationship rather than do any bashing.

    That said, it's not the best story out there; readable, but the flow isn't quite right.
     
  4. Nemrut

    Nemrut The Black Mage Prestige

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    I quite enjoyed this story. I share many of the criticisms that were made in this threat, like the erratic behaviour of the Sandaime with Kakashi which just seemed odd, or the slight Asuma bashing, which just robbed one the wrong way, seeing that canon Kakashi did the same thing and now he "attacks" fanfic Asuma for it, which is unintentionally hypocritical in a really odd way. Similarly, I do not quite like the direction this is taking with Team 7 being the only team to improve. I liked the clash of personalities that happened here, what little we have seen, with Team 7 kinda being rubbed the wrong way by Team 10 after the experiences they have had, but I hope that's not going to be a theme, where the other two/three teams are going to suck and only Team 7 is going to be worth something.

    This story seems to be an odd mixture between People Lie and Dreaming of Sunshine but those two other works, while also focusing on a Team 7, also improved on the side cast, and kept them either awesome or relevant, which I hope this story is going to do too.

    Also, it seemed weird that Kakashi was threatened with execution/suspension for his methods, which seemed like an hollow threat. In the ninja world, exceptional ninja are worth way more than exceptional soldiers in our world. There, a single individual, if powerful enough, can keep up with armies. Threatening to take down Konoha's most powerful active jonin, not counting the Sandaime and the Sannin, seems...unrealistic.

    But I liked pretty much everything else. I liked the chemistry between Kakashi and his team, the different take on Kakashi, the bonds between Team 7 and the growing camaraderie and friendship. I liked the take on Sakura and her backstory, which was one I hadn't seen in fanfiction for her until now. I really loved that they didn't get hundreds of new and broken techniques but rather that they had one technique they had to find different applications for. I liked how it used time skips really efficiently.

    Writing gets a bit weak at times, like, in the beginning it was a bit over-dramatic with "the pariah" and so on repeated a bit often, but solid overall.

    So, yeah, really depends where it goes from here, whether or not the rest of the genin will be included as real characters or just be shit on to show how awesome Team 7 got and how it will handle the plot kicking in as they have just now wrapped up the wave arc.

    Following this one and I hope it won't disappoint. 4/5 for now. Thanks for the recc, OP. Has been quite some time since I last loved a Naruto story this much.
     
  5. Poytin

    Poytin The Arby's Hipster DLP Supporter

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    One thing I liked about this chapter was Kakashi's different name in the Bingo Book which reflects the changed character.
     
  6. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen Prestige DLP Supporter

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    I don't remember this. What was it?
     
  7. Jarsha

    Jarsha Slug Club Member

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    Konohagakure's Fang of Vengance.
     
  8. 0jordinio0

    0jordinio0 Seventh Year

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    Totally lame.
     
  9. Darth Disaster

    Darth Disaster The Waking Sith Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Eh, I was neutral about it. It's AU, so the name change doesn't bother me at all. I always thought 'copy nin' was kinda dumb, anyway.
     
  10. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen Prestige DLP Supporter

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    Eh. Even if someone finds it lame, it's 100x better than some of the canon titles, so it gets a pass from me.
     
  11. Nuhuh

    Nuhuh Dastardly Shadow Admin Moderator

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    Konoha's Fang of Vengeance is so much better than Copy Nin. There were many other sharingan users in Kakashi's time and he's the one who gets that title, now that's lame.

    Anyway, this story is a good read. I like the basic set up and the writing is engaging enough. I do wish could we have seen more interaction with other teams. Especially given the last chapter.
     
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2014
  12. Verse of Darkness

    Verse of Darkness Denarii Host

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    I love this story.

    Like Nuhuh said, now that Team 7 are passed their trial period, I would like to see them interact with the other Teams and other Villages.

    Seeing as this is slightly AU, I also would love some more word building outside of Konoha.

    My only fear with stories like this is Konoha > ALL effortlessly a long with the bashing of other teams. The author is going to have to be careful with the bashing of other Teams/Jonin sensei's a long with making Team 7 too overpowered.

    I see Sasuke has on Madara armor, is Naruto supposed to have on Tobirama's armor?
     
  13. Fardeki

    Fardeki Minister of Magic DLP Supporter

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    Good pick up, wonder if it was intentional by the author or not. I searched some pictures and he does have blue shoulder plates. I like it. It's not Tobirama's armor, but the reference is nice.

    Weird the author didn't have Sarutobi notice it as well, since he commented on Madara's armor you think he would also have commented on the likeness to Tobirama's armor considering Tobirama was his sensei. Also maybe a thought to the symmetry between the two pairs.

    A nice parallel that flew straight over my head.
     
  14. Lion

    Lion Denarii Host DLP Supporter

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    New chapter is up. It was filler, but it's setting things up for the Chunin exam. Hopefully the author changes things around. A rehash, even with a new team 7, is still pretty boring.
     
  15. Darth Disaster

    Darth Disaster The Waking Sith Prestige DLP Supporter

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    I was sort of bored with this chapter.. and Water-Using Naruto is still bugging me. UGH.
     
  16. Jarsha

    Jarsha Slug Club Member

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    Boring, but it did set up something with Izumo and Kotetsu that could be interesting, what with Naruto feeling more loyalty to his team than the village.
     
  17. The Berkeley Hunt

    The Berkeley Hunt Headmaster

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    I thought this fic was ok. Unfortunately I went between reading this and Menace's very enjoyable Naruto story so perhaps by comparison I ended up not being too engaged by this one. No real problems with grammar or spelling, except a penchant for japanese that I dont like. Good team dynamic and individual character development of Kakashi and the team. Acceptable combat scenes and the plot moves along at a decent pace.

    I didnt really see anything to separate this story from the crowd though. Its a slight AU where the team trains up and performs better than the original. It still hit the canon benchmark of the wave mission and will undoubtedly continue onto the chunin exams, which also undoubtedly will take place in Konoha under very similar circumstances. I'd be happy to be proven wrong but it just isnt very original. I feel like I've read this fic a lot of times before.

    I'm gonna say 2.5/5 for being exactly average, with further points to be awarded upon development in future chapters. Definitely worth a read if you want to see a new Naruto story.
     
  18. Pasta Sentient

    Pasta Sentient Disappeared

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    Much better chapter than the past two. The other rookies were developed more and I felt that Naruto's interaction with the Hokage was the best portrayal of Hiruzen so far in this fiction.

    Looks like things will be getting a bit more AU now.
     
  19. Republic

    Republic The Snow Queen Prestige DLP Supporter

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    This chapter was pretty awesome, yeah.
     
  20. The Berkeley Hunt

    The Berkeley Hunt Headmaster

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    Oh boy gmail had been classing all my alerts as spam... I thought people werent updating but I just missed like a years worth of updates.

    Well the chapter wasnt bad. There were a few grammatical errors and awkward sentences eg. 'He stepped back, grunted once more, and closed the fridge with his foot. The resulting smack satisfied Sasuke more than buying groceries, didnt eliminate the general issue though'.

    The scene with the Hokage was good and Shikamaru was decent as well. I dont understand why Naruto told Shikamaru though, seems like blabbing about his mission to all and sundry isnt exactly what the Hokage had in mind.
     
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