Bloody hell!
That was so horrible I actually feel sick now, what the fuck is wrong with these people.
I mean for fucks sake Hagrid!

Do they seriously think that's a good idea, I mean for god's sake. Snape's bad enough but my god they really scraped the bottom of the barrel for that.

I think I need to go bleach the inside of my head now, thanks for that horrible image. I'm still fucking cringing.

Litha

 

http://pottersues.livejournal.com/337198.html
Takes Herman to a whole new level of stupid. Here are a couple of excerpts:

OMG Emo Herman!

A whole new world of grammatical abuse.

That's only a little bit. It's not nearly as bad as some of the stuff you guys find, but it's pretty bad.

 

All right, let me just ask the following of any future posters: Please no posting parts of slash fics where ANY intimate activity is mentioned. I think just mentioning the ship in that horrible so-called "fic" would be enough for any of us to wish its eternal destruction in the pits of Gin.

-J

 

These aren't HP fics, not even close. But I feel they deserve an honorable mention.

Agony in Pink NWS!
Celebrian NWS!!!

 

How about this one?

Falling In Love Again
Fleur is marrying Bill. Yay. NOT! When Harry arives for the weddng, old flames reunite. Starts at the Ball in GOF and then goes to present time. Better Summary Inside.

That was the whole first chapter. The part I deleted was an A/N.

Second quote:

It's not even about the Ginny/Harry. Any author who writes that sort of romance deserves to be skinned alive.

I'd give you more, but I don't want to awaken murderous instincts. I kept reading because the author had asked for criticism for Fleur's accent, which, as you can see, is absolutely dreadful. I gave them a lesson of French accent in a review, and they did exactly the same mistakes in the next chapter.

I left a second review, incredibly nice and understanding given my state of dismay, but when I had to talk about Fleur's accent... I kinda got angry...

 

I just read your review of that fic on FF.net Tinn - funniest thing I've read in a long time. "Arry! I 'ove 'ou!" Priceless.

I'm sure he appreciates your criticism, but I do feel like you are wasting your time. Or, as Fleur would say, 'asting 'our 'ime!

I don't know what kind of fucked up world he lives in when people express their hidden love for each other by kisses on the forehead. I mean, seriously.

 

Warning only the brave should read this



http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2148983/1/

 

ROFL! That story is FULL of win.

 

Yes. Maybe. Still, I'm eagerly waiting for an answer/reaction on their part.

Master Slytherin has once told me I had messed up Hagrid's accent in my story, and, to be honest, I kinda shrugged this criticism away. Now -- if Hagrid's accent in my story was only half as bad as Fleur's accent in this one, I'd like to get on my knees and beg for all my readers' forgiveness (and Master Slytherin's in particular).

"I only 'issed your forehead." Since when do the French speak as if they were chewing on a kg of rubber?

I'm still fuming.

 

I don't think this has been posted here yet. I would've remembered it:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2926755/1/

Some spoilers/previews:

That's right, both Petunia and Dudley are illiterate for some reason.

So, I'm trying to figure out why The Order has personal stores of various wizards' love juices.
*Spoiler*
Dudley's father is Sirius

Read it, it's great.

 

....Hagrid and Harry? Dumbledore and Ginny? What kind of sick people...uke:

 

I just had to put this one here. I laughed my head off reading it.

It was in the Lily/James fics.

And now, a small quote:

That was the whole fic. 85 words. The author must have got a terrible hand cramp after writing so much.

You may want to take a look at the reviews...

 

^^^ Yes, ofcourse! That explains it ALL! No wonder Tom is such a badass insane bastard!!!

And don't even get me started on how wonderful the grammer is...

 

I remember reading a Harry/Hedwig fic once . . .

It was actually fairly well done lawl

Omg. That was deep. What an intelligent look into Tom Riddle's transformation into teh dark lord.

 

Wow that was utterly pathetic. Also am I the only one who can't get fanfiction.net to work right now?

EDIT: Fanfiction.net just started working for me.

 

This story is so bad it's great:
www.fanfiction.net/s/2828044/1/

This is the whole first chapter:

 

I really hope that was susposed to be a parody . . .

Chapter 2

I don't know whats sadder, the quality of this fic or the fact that it managed to get 3000 reviews.

 

3074 reviews, 38 chapters long... So that's 80.894736 reviews per chapter, 80% of which are flames, 19% of which say they really hope it's a parody, and the remaining 1% made me lose faith in the human kind.

Sounds like the FF.Net profile of a pathetic 13-years-old fangirl. I don't need to read it entirely: brackets everywhere and A/N in the middle of a paragraph... This is so obvious bad writing it must be a joke. Please tell me it's a joke.

Thanks for the "so there was no sun," I wasn't sure I could've guessed that on my own.

Where is the exit?

And oh!! Please do read the fourth chapter, I fell off my seat from laughing so hard!

EDIT: Did I say 1% of the reviews made me lose faith in the human race? That was only 0.5%. The other 0.5% are reviews written by the author herself.

 

And those didn't made you lose faith in the human race too?

 

This thread makes baby Voldemort cry.