It was a bit anti-climatic.. but then he was ambushed and didn't have much of a chance to give a good showing. At least we no know how Harry got captured, and sooner rather then later too which is always good.
Now ill just be stuck wondering how he's going to get the coin back.. and the sword too

Just wondering did Michael know that people were lying in wait for Harry? Just the impression that I got with how insistent he was at trying to convince him to stay.

edit:

Because he's a Denarian I figured.

 

Er. Since I have never ever contributed to the 'correct grammar&spelling thing and thus feel guilty...

I'm not too sure on this one, but I think it's 'any more'.

I think there should be either 'as' or 'how', not both. And I think 'flooded' would be more correct...

Period.

It's either 'Harry started, exasperated,' or 'Harry started exasperatedly'.

Harry's.

Wasn't the name Matthew?

 

And the wheel turns full circle. It was hard to keep up with the Carpenter brats, but considering I don't like children and I don't know the Dresden Files beyond what you've mentioned, it is my fault probably.

Regarding the comments above, anything short of fighting Lucifer would have been anticlimactic after fleeing the Dark Lord. I'll go ahead and assume that Harry's interaction with the Carpenters was necessary for the future plot and not comment about it. Great job anyhow.

Edit: Ha to Harry/Amanda

 

Owned by a friggin' Warden. Where the hell did he spring from?

 

Like a Phoenix it shall rise bish, like a Phoenix...

 

Any more

Nerves

Missing the period at the end.

brothers' and sisters'

 

Exactly my sentiment, I don't mind him being a mother fucker arrogant bastard who hates everyone ( yeah even the French!! Can you believe this? ) but if he is a fucking pussy who can't take some insult...

But eh, he is still an unstable teenager.

 

But he had to get upset so that he would get out of the house. The plot must go on afterall.

Maybe in the final version Daniels insults might be a bit worse though? To better justify Harry getting upset? Or something.

 

Yes, by George! He must return to Hogwarts, so that he may take Potions with Professor Snape!

Lolz.

 

Oh please. He has stood up for himself without tantrums for the whole first story, and most of this one. Daniel just hit the two things Harry is most offensive about.

His power.
Meciel.

I do hope that this is the white council, for I can't think of anyone else who could capture him.

 

Nice. I especially liked the interactions with Charity. One thing that certainly made me laugh was the 'turn her into a goat' idea. It was funny especially when the Carpenters and Harry spoke about bestiality.

I laughed.
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Your kind words make my heart soar with happiness Sree.

Now that I think about him returning to Hogwarts, I hope something new happens. Harry constantly making Hermione and the teachers angry is funny, but it can't carry the story.

 

It's a little hypocritical for Charity to throw a sinner out of her house like that. I like it, makes her more real.

They've gotta kiss and make up though . How else will Amanda survive when she tells her mother what she's been doing with Harry during her spare time?

Learning dark magic, I mean.

 

Charity's characterisation is spot on as per the Dresden Files - she says things before realising she speaks out of hand. Harry Dresden cops this attitude all the time. Great updates Shezza.

 

I agree with Dark Syaoran, I hope Charity needs Harrys help in the future and he just laughs at her...

Great update as usual Shezza

 

actually daniel probably hit the spot he is most defensive about.
His power might be somewhere important to him, but when people start to imply that meciel is bad for him then his temper really comes to the front.

 

Anyone else think it ironic her name is Charity and she kicked someone out who needed help?