Cliffhangers suck but the Scrubs reference was full of win. Great new addition Shezza

 

Is it bad that I feel giddy as a schoolgirl after reading that? The moments thing was epic and the image of Umbridge being crucio'd is going to remain with me for a good long while. It's not right that I hate a character this much, but damn if it doesn't feel good to see them suffer.

 

Haha, I loved the Dr. Cox quote. Great chapter.

 

It's really wonderful to see Harry and Amaris sharing these father-daughter moments together. Nothing brings a family closer than covering up after torture.

May I suggest that rather than simply finish her off Amaris send Umbridge to the Winter Court for some time off from teaching...

 

So, it was the vampires in disguise that brought him to Hogwarts? Or do you mean the White Council?

 

I started this and went to lunch. Oz has already posted but I'll go ahead and post mine.

This sounds odd to me. I think it should be leaned. >.>

Separate thank you and student's should be students'.

I would change one of the talks to something else; it's too repetitive.

students'

Missing a word. Spoke maybe?

tried to cram

observing it at

I personally would drop a little

This sounds a little off to me...

'I told you so'."

Capitalize father

there was a

Yeah, that made me laugh. Out of them

bikinis

stray quotation mark

onto it? to it?

Harry's POV, so it should be him

Put the note in italics and drop the apostrophe

worst

'TRAP!'

lower case

you or a pile

drop the apostrophe

me to think

bringing about a bliss that he had

you've

Repetitive from previous paragraph. Cruciatus maybe?

Everybody is prejudiced, Umbridge.

slammed it into

his and drop upon

Repetitive. I would change the middle one to something else, and I would place a comma after one.

Missing word. Fun?

Question mark

You had this capitalized earlier.

the Hogwarts' gates.

--

I'd forgotten how much I'd loved this story after going through the crap on FF.net. I enjoy your rendition of Harry so much. Anyway, great update.

 

Ahh! Great to see a new chapter. Been a while.

I liked the OWL scenes well enough. Harry showing off his charm skills only to blow up a mouse during transfiguration was worth a chuckle or two. And ofcourse Harry torturing Umbridge was awesome.

One complaint I have is that Harry seems to be abandoning the sword, again. For all he knows it is Voldemort personally who is waiting for him so why the hell is he not fetching the sword? I mean in both his encounters with Voldemort, he has only survived because of the sword. Makes no sense he would leave it behind. Even if he has forgotten it in the excitement then Meciel certainly would remember.

Hope to see the next chapter soon.

 

I was wondering about that as well. I figured Shezza probably just forgot about it. For the fic being called Denarian Knight, we really haven't seen much of the sword.

That being said, I loved this chapter. The Harry/Amaris interaction is great, and has easily become one of my favorite parts of the story. The OWL's were handled pretty well, as was the Umbridge confrontation.

 

Oh thank god your still alive.

Great chapter, though it will be better once the beta-ing is put in. I was reading it, and some of the spelling errors jumped out at me.

The father-daughter bonding seemed slightly forced, but maybe thats just me. Other than those things, I loved it and wish to have babies with it. The story, not you. Because your a guy, and that would be gay.

 

I found nothing wrong with the OWL scenes. In fact they were pretty fun and I like small excitable wizards

 

Hooray for Cox references!

BTW, thanks Jon; apparently without your whinging we wouldn't have received this.

 

Yeah Malaga, Jon wasn't whining. He just agreed to give his body to Shezza for an update.

 

Shezza: <3

Fantastic story, I loved just about every minute of it. There's not much to say that hasn't been said already, so keep doing what you're doing!

 

Hey,

The first part (even though it's freaking long) of chapter 29 is up. I usually don't like spamming my own stories, but I got so into this chapter that I spent half the night on it becaue I couldn't stop, so I'd love so feedback and grammar checks about how it is.

Sincerely,
Shezza

 

I doubt the Department of Mysteries will be very pleased with Amanda...

 

You cannot fathom how much love I have for you. It burns brighter than a thousand suns, runs deeper than a trillion Mariana Trenches and is as eternal as-

lolwut?

Seriously, though. The Master of Action strikes again. There's nothing more to say. You've written the most enjoyable action sequences in the fandom for a while now, and that only continues. I wanted to see a Vengeful!Harry swoop down upon the unsuspecting Death Eaters, but I guess what was given will sate me for a little while...

 

Fuck. Yes.

This is the kind of story telling that I love. Beautiful scene. You pulled off Amanda's slip into the dark side beautifully. The spell-slinging from Amanda was a little unexpected because we haven't really seen much about her spell work outside of training before. Nonetheless, I really enjoyed it.

I could visualise the spells and their effects easily. I enjoyed the one-on-one with Bellatrix.

Fuck your exams. Write more of this.