Ok, so I am making this review having read up to half way through chapter 13. Nevile and Harry are just concluding their discussion.

To be honest, I feel my review may be influenced by my actually enjoyment, or lack thereof of the topic, but I'll still go ahead and give it a 2.5, rounded to a 3 to compensate my lack of enjoyment.

Most stories / narratives / hero's journey stories I read, I find myself completely guilty of thinking of myself as the hero, personally relating to them and routing for them as myself. And up to chapter 13, I haven't been able to find the protagonist.

Harry isn't simply an anti - hero. There are truly no redeemable qualities of him, and worse his bad qualities are thoroughly unbelievable. For once, I find a Harry less appreciable than canon. He is a caricature of the rabid hypocritical Gryffindor usually reserved for Ron. I could buy him immediately thinking negatively of Slytherins, and the desperation for putting Death Eaters away, as the expense of those merely compliant in their rule. But the way he handled the search for Headmistress for the preschool was absolutely unbelievable. Wanting to ignore whatshername for the pretty young woman, was something I truly didn't expect of Harry, even given his perverse characterization up to that point. I was even more surprised of Hermione's willingness to pass over here for the Australian guy. People as mature at such a young age as Hermione was, and such a diligent student, don't typically through away somebody as accomplished as the candidate was for, what seems to be, a pretty face. And then the travesty that was Harry's insistence to hear about his parents. As unreasonable as it was to call up a prospective employee by somebody only indirectly involved with the position, for personal reason on something they have no real connection to, was even more unreasonable than I would expect up until then. AND THEN he loses his shit when she speaks poorly of them, when Harry himself was willingly to believe poorly of his farther at 15 for seeing the exact same scene she describes But ok, typically Harry anger i can buy, but canon Harry burned out quick, this guy, 2 years more mature, wants to dismiss her from candidacy entirely.

And then there is the entire willingness of Harry to utterly ignore his own failing, those of his friends and family. Maybe I truly am misremembering canon, but just absolutely everything I've read about Harry in this fic not only made him to be a needless caricature, but just outright butchered what was already a very plausible characterization of him from canon. What surprises me, because many people are capable of shitty writing, is the author isn't a shitty writer. The story and setting is certainly plausible, and people other than me enjoy it for that basis alone. And even though Hermione seems to be in stark contrast to her canon self, its still a real, plausible personality. Shacklebolt, McGonnagle, and what I saw as Neville all experience real, not black and white emotion. This story's one flaw is the characterization of what I'd expect is meant to be a main character, but Christ is it a massive one.

 

You should continue reading - while I agree that the stories main flaw is Harry's shitty characterization, that last third of the story is far better than the beginning.