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WIP The Half-Blood Romantic by Sophprosyne - M

Discussion in 'Romance' started by Taure, Sep 3, 2017.

  1. Jester

    Jester Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    I'm enjoying this mostly because it's a Fleur story and she seems to have taken the spot of my favorite fanon character as of late. It's hilarious to me that others noticed the OWLs thing with Hermione. It popped into my head instantly that it was wrong. Fan sites and the like I guess.

    The writing feels a bit hollow when the playfulness of Fleur is not in a scene. Harry and Ginny has been awkward in places, and the dynamic between Ron and Hermione is a bit boring. The slight swap of Ron getting the HBP text is interesting. Just enough to get my interest piqued. I wonder how he will be dealing with Slughorn after missing the initial invite, and now not being a Potions "prodigy".

    I'm really looking forward to the rest of this story. It's a bit early for me to rate it, but off of Fleur alone this is an easy 3/5 with a lot of potential if it gets refined a bit, and the story is more substantial than Fleur becoming Harry's Mrs. Robinson.
     
  2. Sauce Bauss

    Sauce Bauss Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    I'm okay with this.
     
  3. Lord Murtaza

    Lord Murtaza First Year

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    Ended up reading it - have to agree that it has a lot of potential and that it is a bit too early to rate. Will be keeping an eye out for updates.

    Would not agree with OP's opinion that this is the best Harry/Fleur story out there.
     
  4. Hush

    Hush Slug Club Member

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    Curious to see what you think is, it's a pretty dry section of the fandom. Most stories are unrealistic with a 14 year old Harry or the authors age Harry up. This one seems to be doing a good job with the timeline and characterisations.
     
  5. EmeraldGuardian

    EmeraldGuardian First Year DLP Supporter

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    I'm very glad that I found this yesterday. It's a bit to early to say for certain but I think this is the Harry/Fleur story that I've been waiting to read for years. It very much has a canon feel while still being changed enough that its interesting and doesn't feel like a canon rehash. Even how Harry is now studying harder feels much more natural than most fics where the author can be usually quite heavy handed. The Harry/Fleur conversations are my favorite parts so far, and I think its quite interesting how Fleur's thoughts on Harry seem to be shifting as of the third chapter, even if not in a romantic direction yet. What worries me is how the Bill/Fleur relationship will dissolve in the future. Whatever it is that will happen, I'm hoping the characters will remain in character like they have so far. I think how that whole situation works out is what could make this fic sink or swim in the end.

    It's a 5/5 for me.

    I will admit that the Harry/Fleur interaction is definitely what makes this story shine and is the reason I am reading it, but I wouldn't go so far as to sat that the rest "boring." I'll agree the Harry/Ginny interaction is a bit awkward but I think it's supposed to be. That's the whole point. He isn't quite sure how he feels about Ginny. He is physically attracted to her, yet also sort of freaked out by how fixated she seems on becoming his girlfriend. He doesn't know if he likes the lengths she seemingly is willing to go to get his attention and isn't sure if he is ready to commit to what she wants. To me that just screams awkward interactions while he is still figuring things out.

    I think I have to agree with Hush here. While the story itself isn't perfect, have you seen the state of Harry/Fleur fanficion? It really wouldn't surprise me if this was the becomes the best Harry/Fleur story in the fandom. Wastelands of Time is a masterpiece but is so AU that it almost doesn't even count to me. It feels more like a crossover than a true Harry Potter story. Don't get me wrong, I love it, but it doesn't depict a mostly canon personality-wise Harry and Fleur in a relationship like this new story seems to be doing, and Wastelands of Time is the only one I can think of on the top of my head that could compare.
     
  6. Krieger

    Krieger Minister of Magic DLP Supporter

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    Just started reading this story and noticed:

    "I've never heard of someone who got ten O.W.L.S before," Mrs. Weasley said.

    I don't have my Harry Potter books anymore, but didn't the magnificent Percy get 12? Or has that been retconned as well now?

    So far so good though.
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2017
  7. Nazgus

    Nazgus Minister of Magic

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    It's been brought up, author forgot since it'd been too long since they read the books.
     
  8. Lord Murtaza

    Lord Murtaza First Year

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    Forgive me, I should have elaborated a bit more. I have no such qualms with judging a Harry/Fleur pairing if the timeline is skewed, or if the fic is massively AU. Hence my saying that this fic is not the best H/F out there, when there are gems like 'Wastelands' (as @EmeraldGuardian mentions) or even 'The Lie I've Lived' by jbern, amongst others. There's even 'A Cadmean Victory', if you can look swallow the extremely bitter pill that is: Super!Harry, Intelligent!Harry, Everythingunderthebloodysun!Harry and the absolutely god awful ending.

    I do agree with you in regards to this being one of the more drier sections of the fandom - though not for lack of trying. Fleur in my humble opinion, is one of the more difficult characters to write (similar to Dumbledore) and should really only be approached by the more talented authors in the fandom. Canon does not offer her up as a clean slate (as it does Daphne Greengrass, where authors are free to do with her as they wish). she's a complex three dimensional character that starts out pretty flat. Had her appearance in canon only been limited to the fourth book, a lot of Fanfic authors would have nailed her spot on, with the vast majority of works showing her to be a stuck up/spoilt ***** who suddenly turns on the charm offensive on Harry when she finds out he's immune to her allure. Eugh, what a load of bollocks.
     
  9. Sey

    Sey Unspeakable DLP Supporter

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    Wastelands might be a better story, but were talking about just the Fleur/Harry interactions. Harry in Wastelands is Harry in name only anyway. And The Lie I've Lived, while revolutionary at the time, doesn't really hold up.
     
  10. Dark Belra

    Dark Belra Minister of Magic

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    Shouldn't the OP be updated to include the WbA thread for this story?

    Might be useful to those who don't know about it.
     
  11. Anarchy

    Anarchy Totally Sirius DLP Supporter

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    This... this isn't very good. I'm not really sure what other people in this thread are seeing. Three chapters posted, and the only lingering thought is that this is following the exact same path that Wind Sheer did. First, you have to struggle with the fact that the premise itself makes no sense at all. Why is Fleur at the Weasley's when Bill isn't? Why did Fleur get fired/quit Gringotts when they're not actually married yet (and going by canon, that wouldn't be for another year)? Why is a "Defense club leader" considered a job? Fleur is an intelligent witch who was a Triwizard champion - she should be able to get a job pretty much anywhere. It all seems completely arbitrary, and since the entire first chapter was dedicated to this, it's hard to not mention it.

    Then, there are the characterizations. I don't see what is compelling about any of them. Ginny is two dimensional, Hermione and Ron are just sounding boards, and half of the Harry/Fleur interactions just come off as monologues directed at the other person stating how they've had to deal with X Y and Z, and then they go "wow, good thing we got that out of the way." Just... none of it feels very real. It feels like the author is trying to make the puzzle fit together, while hitting all the notes that ffn readers expect the author to try and hit when tackling this pairing. The only reason the Fleur in this story is notable at all is because she's getting actual screen time and dialog, and isn't just a prop. That doesn't make it interesting though.

    Lastly, there's all the small details. The small details are really what make or break a story, and so far, it's been very miss. It's more apparant since there's only 3 chapters. Most of those have already been picked through in this thread, but they really do stick out when reading the story. That, coupled with the random speeches (such as the "knowledge" one at the end of chapter 1), makes it pretty hard to get into the fic, and makes it so I wouldn't consider it well-written.

    Right now, three chapters posted, I'd rate it a 2/5. If the author somehow manages to make the story more coherent and flow more naturally, I can see myself rating it a 3/5. If it somehow turns into the greatest Harry/Fleur story of all time, well, then we'll see. The bar's not very high, but there's still a bar.
     
  12. Tasoli

    Tasoli Headmaster

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    4th chapter out. And I am liking how a drunk Harry acts differently without going over the top. I think this story has a lot potential to be a fun story provided it does not go to angst route.
     
  13. Scott

    Scott Professor DLP Supporter

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    I'm giving it a 5/5. The characterization of Fleur is excellent and the interactions between all the character just flows so naturally. Especially between her and Harry.

    This is I have to say my new favorite Fleur in the whole fandom @Newcomb step your game up.
     
  14. MrBucket

    MrBucket Fourth Year

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    Don't particularly care about Ginny in this story, nor do I think I like the direction the author is taking in regards to her. Other than that, it's a pretty good fic, in my opinion. I don't think it's groundbreaking or anything, but worth a read. But then again, it's not very long now. It may get very tedious once/if it hits 200,000 words.
     
  15. A Lizard By

    A Lizard By Any Other Name

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    I don't like Ginny, never have. She is tolerable for me in this story though. I like that he's making her infatuated with Harry, but not to the point of complete craziness. She's still a teenage girl and while she's clearly trying to power through Harry's apathy for her, she is also clearly struggling with the rejection.

    As for the rest of it, I look forward to reading every chapter because the dialogue between Fleur and Harry is like crack to me. I wish I could pound this shit and snort it.

    I mean, uh... yeah... It's alright I guess.





    5/5
     
  16. HPFAN992

    HPFAN992 Muggle

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    Hey how is everybody this is my first post ever.. I just want to ask does anyone have any news about the next update it's been two months since the last chapter was posted and i can't wait for the next one
     
  17. Microwave

    Microwave Sixth Year

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    Sometimes other things just get in the way of writing, there's no point in pestering anybody about an update.
     
  18. HPFAN992

    HPFAN992 Muggle

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    I know that life got in the way of responding to this post haha
    I also read that the author gets a lot of support from people here who help him written and edit the chapters, I thought maybe somebody knew something more I absolutely love the fix it is one of my all time favourite Harry/Fleur stories
    --- Post automerged ---
    Sorry for pestering anybody that was not my intention kind ser :)
    --- Post automerged ---
    Many people like it because One the writing is better than 90% of the fic's out there.. it's worth the read for that alone. Second it is new.. it's been a while since we got a new fic fic that had some promise most didn't add anything new.. this one kind of did.
    Third I know this Harry is a bit OC.. but so is Fleur.. their interaction is fun to read, the rest of the story can drag on a bit but it is worth it for the Harry Fleur part.
    I don't know what the author has in mind for the rest of the story and how he develops it will make or brake the fic how will the war paly out, how will he deal with the story that is awesome in the books and has been done in a lot of five, will we see something new or not.. personally I hope the author does have Voldemort use Fleur as a weakness bla.. because it is so predictable and also this Fleur is capable of something in this fic.
    But hey that's just my 2 cents on the matter