He did try to let them off easy. Sure he probably could have put more effort into it, but on the other hand you can always say that he should have put more effort into something.

Ginny - his plan to get her over him backfired so he is stuck with a full blown crush and he isn't quite sure how to deal with it. More to the point he has bigger fish to fry - namely Death Eaters and good old Voldie. So he tries to set her up with somebody else to hopefully distract her and get her somebody else in return.

Katie? As far as he is concerned she is just a sort of friend. She invited him to go to Hogsmeade - he agreed, unfortunately stuff came up. I got the impression he told her he needed to do something with Neville, just didn't tell her what, so she was warned that he might be late and it was common knowledge that he had detention with McGonaggal (which wasn't really something he planned or wanted to do).

As far as I can tell Harry isn't really looking for a relationship just now, he is looking to survive a war that he is pretty sure is comming - having Jame's memories of the last one isn't really conductive to making him take it easy.

Another point is that HJ isn't James. He isn't Harry. At this point he himself is still deciding who exactly he is. So he isn't 14 and he isn't 20-something, but probably somewhere in between with a lot of traumatic experiences.

He can't really relate to his old friends because suddenly they have nothing in common - school? He could probably graduate in a year or so after he has had time to brush up on all his new memories. Quidditch? Sure, but that takes second place to survival besides the Seeker isn't really a team player.

A completely different set of priorities, which of course makes it even harder to relate to his old friends since doesn't really want to or have the time or patience to put too much effort into trying.

 

AHHHHHHH, a wall of text.

*Gasp*

 

Great story!!! Actually I love all your stories... except To Fight the Coming Darkness. Something in that one just doesn't click.

Anyway as I was saying I love this fic. I like the portrayal of the hat, very original and well thought out and a lot of fun to read. So far I've never read another fics that shows the hat as a bad mouthed perv.

I also like how you didn't make James and Lily the Saints in Holy Light. Regardless of what others think I think it makes them more human, a fact that many people seem to forget. In additions to your comments about Lily/Remus thing, I would like to point out that it is entirely possible that Lily simply cracked under the pressure of the time (Harry may die, Voldy after them, lack of contact with the outside world etc.) and with James away training turned to Remus for comfort.

HJ is a well made character who I think is starting to find his own identity, and you've done that very well. There are too many people that would just have Harry shift personalities without well thought out layouts of the story.

The feud with the Weasly's is also a very good change of pace. Though I would like to see the twins getting theirs later on. And maybe Ron too. And Hermione. Oh heck with it, have him prank the whole school. I'm sure the hat would get a kick out of it.

One thing I do not like is the way that the entire school suddenly turns on him. While I know there are times like that in canon I find it hard to imagine that everyone would do that. There are bound to be some wolfs among the flock (not the poucy Malfoy), others who are capable of independent thinking, however few. I would also think HJ would be a bit more active in finding such human allies as well as the unusual one (ghosts, hats etc). With his maturity he would see the benefits of having other sources of information, backups etc. Of course it probably won't be easy to persuade them to his side, but then what has been. Plus it might piss the others off... Just an idea that I would like to put forward. I've read so many fics where everyone in school and their donkey turned against Harry for some reason or another and its hard to imagine that there won't be at least one or two others that don't just flow with the tide.

I would also really, really like to see Neville start to kick some ass in future chapters...

So what plans do you have for Snape and Draco? Thats one major thing thats on my mind. The other is:

WHO THE HELL IS SARAH UNDERHILL???

That's been driving me up the wall!!!

4.75/5

 

This is probably the only jbern fic that got me hooked. Not that the others are bad, but I find that I just can't get into "Bungle in the Jungle" and "To Fight the Coming Darkness". That said, this fic has just skyrocketed all the way up to the top of my "Most Desired Fics" list. I need MOAR!

I've always had a soft spot when it comes to Harry facing overwhelming odds or having the entire school opinion turned against him. This time, he probably won't have Hermione's help too!

Can't wait for the Tasks to begin. I'm always a sucker for those. Will they be the same as canon though. If they are, I'd like to suggest Harry using the Imperius Curse on the dragon. Think about it: Dumbledore already knows he has either a strong will or loads of magical power. If he can fight off the dominating will of someone else's mindcurse, it rightfully follows that he can use the same curse to dominate lesser wills. As an Unforgivable and a mindcurse at that, dragon blood/hide should not really impede it. And it is only an Unforgivable when used on a human. Given the supremacist attitudes wizards display towards magical creatures, it's probably open season on the dragon. Harry could Cruciate it or Avada Kedavra it for all they care.

5/5 AND NEEDS MOAR UPDATES.

 

What's up with new part of this great story?

Last chapter was not as funny but more realistic.

5/5

 

I havent thought about this in a while. This needs an update.

 

I think this story is funny and well written and should be updated.

 

I'm working on TML chapter 3 and then the conclusion of TFtCD (chapter 40). Lie chapter 8 will start immediately after I conclude that story.~Jim

 

Just wanted to comment on the sorting hat a little more.

I think you're doing a great job of giving him actual personality.

Some of the wisest and cleverest people I know are dirty rotten freakin perverts deep down.

That the hat is such a cantankerous bastard is just plain made of awesome.

I mean I'd be pretty fucking cantankerous too if all I got to see of the world was the inside of the headmaster's rooms 364 days out of the year, and the one night I am out of there I'd have to sit on top of the heads of a buncha 11 year olds and sort them.

I'd be crotchety and dirty minded just to keep myself from going in-fucking-sane.

Keep it up.

 

I gotta say the hat is awesome and it needs a tommy gun. That would be just fucking awesome. The hat is by far the best character in any of your fics.

 

The Sorting Hat in The Lie That I Have Lived is one of my favorite characters in HP Fandom. I hope we get more of in the next chapter.

The story The Lie I've Lived is in my Top five of favorite fics. Unfortunately Jbern gives his other projects priority over this one.


Homer

 

The Lie I've Lived is my favorite story by Jbern. The first few chapters were a little rough around the edges, but it has picked up since then.

First person is my favorite point of view by far, I find the plot the most interesting and well done, and Harry hasn't yet received any special status or honors to set him apart from his fellow students in a significant way.

Even in canon Harry has always received some minor special privileges thanks to Dumbledore's interest in him...but thus far he hasn't been given private chambers, married while in school, given official titles etc like in JBerns other stories. I like an independent Harry, but I like to keep it reasonable. Okay, he did get out of Snape's class, but quite frankly at a real school that would have been the least they would have done. They probably would have simply fired Snape.

 

Personally, one of the main reasons I like this story so much is because the hat is insane- for the exact reason that you just said. Besides, sanity is seriously overrated, and considering how the hat seemed to actually mellow a little bit from the first meeting compared to the latest chapter, I think that the poor thing is handling its imprisonment fairly well. Yes, it is still pretty bitter and sarcastic, but some air has seemed to make it slightly less crazy.

Keep up the good work Jbern.

 

Vash isn't the only one with that belief. I like Jberns other work but for some reason this story didn't grab my attention at all. It might be unique but for some reason I have difficulty in reading it.

 

This and Bungle are my Favorite Jbern Fics, I like Darkness to an extent but those two have all the Sexual akwardness that being that age brings, though in bungle he more embraces it and hugs its bossom, but still The lie ive lived is so freakin sweet I hold my sides from laughing so hard, keep up the amazing work JBern.

 

Updated!

Chapter 8 – Censure and Sensibility

There is less humour than previous chapters. The Sorting Hat still plays a supportive role, it'll be interesting to see what he comes up with during the Triwizard Tournament.

Harry has been displaying angry, teenage loner syndrome this chapter. He's been unfairly isolated by his peers so he's cutting himself off from them. Nobody understand me so I'll just be over here saving your asses, and when you really need me, then you'll be sorry. Yeah. Hopefully he snaps out of that shit soon. He's supposed to be a man, not some snot-rag, emo teenager.

I'm also a little worried about the size of the Tournament, it's blown out in depth and breadth. Six contestants and ten challenges iirc. That's a lot of page count...

When it comes to the ladies, Harry is talking the talk, but he ain't walking the walk. Even if he doesn't get a main squeeze, he should be very interested in acquiring one (or a series of ones). As for his whinging about the age gap... he needs to harden the fuck up. Maybe there really is more to his comradeship with Neville than he's willing to let on. "Harry, have you seen my toad?" "I saw him in a plastic tube not 5 minutes ago" "A plastic tube?" "Gimme another minute to finish off, then I'll bend over and you can have a look" "wah!?" "Boy, Trevor sure can kick!"

For all of my bitching, I love this fic. The chapter length was excellent. The characters are entertaining (if a little frustrating atm, Harry needs peeps that he can interact with and relate to, to keep his character/personality challenged and growing - jealous Hermione and Ron don't fit the bill, and Hat is limited).

The development at the very end of the fic was handled beautifully. I'm finding it hard to wait and see how the fake!moody ploy plays out, but with such a large Tourney planned it probably won't be any time soon.

Seeing as we're in for the long haul with the Tourney, I'd really like to see Harry's interactions with some of the other contestants. If Harry's school peers are "sheep", then perhaps the other champions will show quality of character that Harry can respect. They might even inspire some character growth.

Good luck with your writing. I'm really looking forward to reading the next chapter.

Yak.

 

New chapter

Jim,

This chapter just catapulted TLIL into #1 in the ranking between your various stories for me.

Harry's more mature attitude does indeed come across as arrogant and precocious for a child of his physical age, but as mature and intelligent for an adult... a very strange dichotomy for the other characters to have to deal with and for the reader to remember that Harry appears different to the outside world than to the reader who has a clear picture of his interior landscape.

Oh, and Yak, I think you're misunderstanding Harry's attitude.
You're thinking he's acting like angsty emo boy... in reality he's not.

Look at his actions, they're the actions of a 30+ year old. He's trying to keep the "kids" out of harms way while he (an adult in his perspective) takes care of things the right way.

To an outside observer... he looks like a kid that is acting like a snot rag because it looks like he's a kid trying to pretend to be an adult. When in reality he's an adult in a kid's body, trying to take on his adult responsibilities and expecting the respect he expects as a mature person.

So while he may be showing indications of "angry teenage loner syndrome" to an outsider... he's really just being an adult auror who is trying to keep kids out of his way.

As to him "hardening up" and snogging a girlfriend. Jeeze man... think about it.. how old are you? Let's say you're 20... would you want to be snogging some 10 year old? Because to Harry's perspective, these girls are half his age or less.

Some of the 16 year olds and 17 year olds might be incredibly tempting for him... but he's looking at them from a perspective of being significantly mentally older than them. To him, he's used to women... and likely still dealing with the Lily fixation from James. Remember, he's got experiences of having done his own mom (as James) floating in his head... talk about trauma.

This sort of deep character analysis is what makes Jims fics stand out. If you dig a little and think about the mental state of the characters, you usually find explainations for why they act as they do.

But back to Jim...

Good stuff, Jim

Now, that said, a few observations. From what I've seen Harry may just be harming his chances of keeping Ron and Hermione clear of danger by his current actions and has a load of trouble coming his way from threats internal to his own social network

1. Showing Hermione that he can create an age line was a serious mistake on his part.

Hermione is a freak for knowledge and highly competitive. Hell, as far as information goes, she'd likely fuck books if she could do it without getting the pages all wet and sticky. But I digress. The point is; Harry just showed her that he knows more about something than she does and that he's been duffing it deliberately in class. She's NOT going to let that go. Now that she knows that he's been hiding that he knows more than her, she's going to be going to be on him soon and likely demanding that he share. The other thing is... she's a bossy girl. Bossy girls generally like guys that are arrogant and that don't put up with their bossey ways, or that push back hard. It's that whole emotional friction thing. So Harry may just have traded Ginny for Hermoine on the stalker front.

2. Harry's hard line stance with Ron. Holy Shit, Jim. The situation with Ron could go one of two ways at this point. He's either alienated him for good (doubtful) or he's just unintentionally forced Ron to face up to what Harry has to deal with. Ron could well actually grow the hell up... shock of shocks there.
The problem with that is that if he does, Harry will likely be forever unable to get Ron to back the hell off so that Harry can keep him safe. Instead he might just become a real friend and stick by Harry through the thick and the thin.

3. The Twins. Holy moly. I'm not sure if it's the case, but it feels like the twins are one prank away from the nasty shit raining down on them and Harry pulling out the stuff that James wouldn't even try on Snape. If so... i can hardly wait to see what you have in store for the story. They've stepped over the line more than a bit already... I'm just wondering when the feces is gonna hit the rotating atmospheric oscillator. Somehow I get the feeling that something public, in front of the press might be in store.

4. The cesure. again, holy moly. Wow, talk about unforseen complications. Something tells me a whole lot of people are going to be eating crow over that.

Also the hint at a "fire and brimstone" Minnie... Damn... please... bring her into the story. Having her resurrect such an earlier self would be incredible. I mean you can see the seeds (or ashes) of that former self in her. But having her come storming into class like a freight train and laying the smack down would be outstanding. I can picture her coming into class with a stack of people's papers and slamming them down in front of Granger and having her pass them out... or better yet, call out names and announce the grades.

"Boot, Terry... Troll. An abysmal piece of rubbish, Mister Boot. If you plan on passing MY class this year I'll expect immediate improvement out of you. I'm assigning you detention in the library for a two hours a night until you can present me with a paper that rises above a minimum of satisfactory. Weasley, Ron...Troll... with special demerits. Confused, ill educated, and stupid are no way to go through life, young man. Your mother has already been informed. I'm also assigning Angelina Johnson to you as a tutor. You'll be meeting with her every night for at least 1 hour and she'll be reporting to me on your progress. Granger, Hermione, Troll... I specified a certain length, I expect it to be that length. I furthermore did not ask for you to blather on endlessly about the topic and I trust that this sort of behavior will be corrected immediately."

A shellshocked and humiliated Hermione would be worth it right there... Having Minnie "troll" every student to scare the living hell out of them would be classic. Forcing the students to actually perform in class would be even better. Though it would force Ron and Hermione to beg HJ into helping them meet the grade.

All I can say is that my mind is awhirl at the possibilities of a fire and brimstone Minerva McGonagall

Finally.. the hat.

No mercy for the weak or ignorant.. Pure awesome. My love for The Hat grows with each chapter.

 

Good chapter!
I'm giddy to read the breakthrough in Harry/Fleur relationship. Something earth-shattering has to happen for those two to get together. They say that a woman can completely change a man in less than an hour. Why not the other way around.

 

Maybe after Harry lays the smack down on everyone in the dueling tournament? Some comforting for Fleur afterwards?

But seriously, I don't think he needs partnering up with anyone at this point. Smashing everyone in the tournament (Krum in a vicious overwhelming manner), plus laying the smack down on the twins is enough for me.

 

Thanks for the comments. There's a good chance of a fakeMoody smackdown coming next chapter.

Considering HJ's newfound feelings towards Frank and Alice, there's a good chance Barty is going down.

HJ is still evolving. On one hand he remembers how a spoiled playboy named James practically owned this place. Now, every time he tries to do something it seems to backfire.

To make matters worse, he could drown his sorrows in some little honey, but that's just sex. He has memories of being married, trying to raise a kid and fighting for his life. Is some vapid teenaged wench going to get that or is she going to get upset that he's not carrying her books to class?

Oh yeah, and someone's trying to kill him - again. The Hat is the only one who gets it an he's an angry pissed off mofo!

Jim