1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

Abandoned The Thief of Hogwarts by Bluminous8 - M

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by Jtemplar8, Jul 31, 2009.

  1. Stenstyren

    Stenstyren Professor

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2009
    Messages:
    465
    Really liked this and eagerly awaiting updates.
    Kleptomania!Harry is something i have never seen before and the fact that he is portrayed very good definitely makes this very readable.

    4.5/5
     
  2. Kinser

    Kinser Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2008
    Messages:
    111
    Hum...this is well different. I like klepto!Harry. Kinda reminds me of myself. There are a few errors. A beta reader should be able to catch them though.

    And over all this is good light reading and it is definitely funny. I give it a 3/5 right now but I reserve the right to revise my rating at any time.
     
  3. sirius009

    sirius009 Minister of Magic

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2005
    Messages:
    1,302
    Location:
    United States
    Yeah I don't know what the hell is going on there, I mean Neville pretty much just got caught masterbating to her image, it adds nothing to the story and is incredibly disturbing not the least bit funny.

    Lol, you comment on the grammar/spelling errors yet you misspell overall, and I'm not sure b/c I've never wrote the word, but isn't clepto spelled with a c not a k?
     
    Last edited: Aug 5, 2009
  4. capo327

    capo327 Sixth Year

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2005
    Messages:
    184
    Location:
    Chicago
    One of the funniest fics I've read, though I was high. I think I might reread it later to actually absorb what happens.
     
  5. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 2007
    Messages:
    2,290
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New Zealand
    High Score:
    4,500
    Rofl Capo, I know what you mean. I've done the same thing a few times in the past. :p
     
  6. Kensington

    Kensington Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2008
    Messages:
    1,356
    Location:
    West Coast
    This fic is pretty damn enjoyable. It's actually rather impressive to see Bluminuous improve as he writes story after story. His early smut is outright terrifyingly horrible, the Power of Oa is need of a good editor but still enjoyable (I really like the Harry/Kara pairing - Kara should be in more stories), and this is just plain fun to read.

    4/5
     
  7. Delirium

    Delirium Fourth Year

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2008
    Messages:
    112
    Lol, you comment on the grammar/spelling errors yet you misspell overall, and I'm not sure b/c I've never wrote the word, but isn't clepto spelled with a c not a k?[/QUOTE]

    klepto should be with a k. It's derived from Greek, κλεφτης: thief κλεπτομανια: someone who cant stop stealing stuff.
     
  8. e1

    e1 Third Year

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2008
    Messages:
    102
    Location:
    33°51′35.9″S 151°12′40″E
    4/5

    Guilty pleasure fic for me. Doesn't quite match up to nonjon's thief!Harry in A Black Comedy, but an interesting read nonetheless. The writing isn't up to par. Author needs to work on his tenses, spelling and English grammar in general. Nitpicks aside, I found the humour to be engaging and the overall light-heartedness, a refreshing change. This fic had me smiling the entire time.

    Plotwise, there's not much to comment on. Seems to be taking the canon route with a few related side-plots, and I'd rather the author keeps it that way. It's simplistic and easy to follow, and I'll keep reading as long as the punch lines continue to punch.

    Also ...

    1000 reviews in a little over a month. Damnnn...
     
  9. psihary

    psihary Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2008
    Messages:
    365
    Location:
    ... I've got a polar bear for a neighbour...
    The story just got updated, and the new chapter does not disappoint.

    Although, the humor at some places came up as rather forced (read the part where Albus bitches about his stolen sweets), and the story is yet to show any real plot beside telling the rather amusing life of Harry Potter(which should have put it under the Humor/Parody section, me thinks), the story still is one of the very few, now a days, that snatched my attention right from the beginning and so far it won't let go.

    I understand that it could be quite annoying at some parts, especially where Harry is mostly characterized as a 7 year old rather than the teen he is(I guess the author, girl I presume, simply has no clue how sexually oriented mind, a boy of his age has... and there are no exceptions... ignoring the puffs, that is), but those passages could easily be overlooked in favor of the hilarious situation they create.

    A solid 4/5 and to rise higher if the author decides on introducing a plot to the story as well. Although from someone with this
    written in their profile page, I hardly expect so... I truly hope to have misjudged but unfortunately I doubt that...
     
  10. wolf550e

    wolf550e High Inquisitor DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2006
    Messages:
    585
    Gender:
    Male
    I'm afraid s/he is serious about KiP. And being female does not excuse the author from knowing the difference between an eight year old and a twelve year old. It's a major problem with suspension of disbelief in the story, because it has nothing to do with magic. I can stomach Harry's "fading" (a dues-ex machina if I ever saw one), but a second year acting eight is wrong.
     
  11. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2008
    Messages:
    1,604
    Who would tell him about sex? Usually people hear it from big brothers/friends, and Harry has neither. I don't think his clueless-ness is particularly funny, but it doesn't bother me.
     
  12. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 2007
    Messages:
    2,290
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New Zealand
    High Score:
    4,500
    I'm with Grub on this one, for once.

    Harry hasn't really had time to mature at all, and his seeming immaturity doesn't bother me at all. IN fact, I think that this is the only fic where the author has actually managed to pull off a young character that i've read.
     
  13. Schrodinger

    Schrodinger Muggle ~ Prestige ~

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2009
    Messages:
    1
    High Score:
    1691
    This is a really fun read, IMO. Despite how annoying it is that Harry has the sexual awareness of a toddler.
     
  14. Howdy

    Howdy Dark Lord

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2008
    Messages:
    1,865
    Location:
    The Playhouse
    Harry went to public school until he was 11. The notion that he has no concept of what sex is is laughable.
     
  15. Warlocke

    Warlocke Fourth Champion

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2006
    Messages:
    3,051
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The armpit of Ohio
    THIS.

    This is why I detest the tired cliché of Sirius, Remus, Arthur, Mr. Granger, or any other adult giving Harry 'The Talk', whether it is played for humor or not (the exception being where he already knows all this shit and uses it as an opportunity to torture, horrify, and embarrass the adult - either through his extensive revealed expertise, or his feigned ignorance and misconceptions).

    Runner-up is the cliché of Hermione (rarely Luna or Ginny) teaching Harry about the menstrual cycle, particularly if he ends up getting turned into a girl.

    As far as I know, by the time most children in the western world have reached 11/12, they have received enough education on human sexuality to know the basics of insert tab A into slot B, how children are conceived, and how the menstrual cycle works. This tends to hold true even in places where the sex education leans heavily towards 'abstinence education'.

    That Harry wouldn't know the basics is, pardon the pun, inconceivable. I guess Dudley stuffed him in a locker the weeks they taught that stuff? :rolleyes:

    Of course, I did see at least one story where Harry started to protest to the Grangers that he knew that stuff, but then they started to unload detailed information on oral and anal sex, which sent him into shut-up-and-quietly-freak-out mode. :D
     
  16. kmfrank

    kmfrank Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2008
    Messages:
    760
    Location:
    Ann Arbor, MI
    I seem to remember that fic as well, Warlocke...and it was lulz.

    But yeah, I seem to remember starting to horn on girls in fifth grade, which is like age 11 - and I recall that kids started telling sexcapade stories about then, too. Whether they were true or not - most probably not - fact is there was an awareness about it, and I didn't share a common room with 17 year olds!

    I mean, 90% of high school age thought revolves around sex and nudity, so unless he's totally fucking clueless borderline retarded, he knows about it.

    And on THAT note, my retarded cousin with the mind of a 7 year old horns on girls all the time! (Which is lulzy and hysterical to watch, btw)

    Anyway, yeah despite the lulzy parts, Harry's ignorance should be rewritten to something like trading stories with the 7th years or something, in an attempt to fit in and "be cool". Worshipping high schoolers seems like more typical middle school behavior to me.
     
  17. Kensington

    Kensington Denarii Host DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2008
    Messages:
    1,356
    Location:
    West Coast
    Meh, this doesn't break the story for me at all.

    From what I remember - 11 was around the age when girls suddenly became inoculated from cooties and what-not. I'm also pretty damn sure 11 was when I had my first sex-ed class, although I may have been 10. I just remember that there was this asshat that everyone called "Boner" since first grade, and all of a sudden we understood explicitly what a boner was. That said, I have no clue what age this stuff is done in England.

    Frankly, I'm loving the progression of this Harry. Yeah, he's more than a little naive - but with his introduction to Fred and George those days seem to be at an end. I'm just finding this story pretty damn enjoyable.
     
  18. Mordac

    Mordac Minister of Magic DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Aug 28, 2006
    Messages:
    1,318
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Birmingham, England
    Maybe he's asexual, but I'm not holding out hope.
     
  19. Tasoli

    Tasoli Minister of Magic

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2008
    Messages:
    1,242
    Location:
    Behind the keyboard
    I think Harry knows abaout sex but just doesn't think that way. Let's give author few chapters then we can bitch about it.
     
  20. Warlocke

    Warlocke Fourth Champion

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2006
    Messages:
    3,051
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    The armpit of Ohio
    Fffffuck.

    I was composing a reply and then... it was gone.

    The 'tl/don't feel like rewriting it' version must suffice.

    I don't have a problem with the way the relationships are progressing in this fic, though Harry's total ignorance of certain facts of life strains my suspension of disbelief. Then again, the outlandishness of it is, I suppose, an aspect of comedy.

    I can buy a twelve year old not knowing what a betrothal is, though you'd think as cautious as this Harry is, he'd confirm what it meant before making any agreements.

    On the other hand, it's hard to believe he didn't detect ANY of the double meanings in his conversation with the Hogwarts boys about his playing with Fleur.

    Actually, regarding relationships, Hermione's sort of getting the shaft, considering this story was conceived as H/Hr.

    What little screen time she's had lately, she's been snapped at by Harry, insulted by others with Harry doing little if anything about it, or Harry shows up long enough to say 'Hi', then vanishes, his running into her basically being an accident in the first place, if not a bit of a hassle for him. He was supposed to visit her over the holidays and ended up just running into her in France, which was pure coincidence.

    Not especially friendly, seeing as she considers herself one of his best friends. If she knew she was actually somewhere behind the Flamels, the Delacours, Tonks, and maybe even the twins among his priorities, she'd probably be heartbroken, crush or no crush.

    Anyway, like I said, the relationships here are doing just fine for the most part -he's twelve, FFS- it's just the sheer level of Harry's apparent ignorance that I find hard to believe. Does it say something that I find Harry being a preteen animagus-familiar who can super-apparate easier to accept?
    ...

    I just also happened to mention my dislike for the fics that try to say Harry knows nothing about human reproduction in order to use 'The Talk' cliché for comedic purposes. Over here, we took that class in 5th grade.

    Granted, you had to have a signed permission slip for the class, I suppose it could go either way in Surrey... I could see the Dursleys gleefully binning Harry's slip out of pure spite.

    At the same time, I could see them making sure he took the class so he didn't 'knock up some tramp' out of ignorance, thus putting the Dursleys in a position of financial responsibility. So there you have it.

    Meh, enough of that tangent.


    I think I've only seen a human becoming someone's familiar in HP fanfic once or twice. I believe Cho turned out to be Harry's familiar in one story.


    Shit, the short rewrite didn't end up being so short. I think the original was more... concise.
     
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2009
Loading...