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WIP The Well Groomed Mind by Lady Khali - T

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Darth Disaster, Oct 28, 2012.

  1. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    I'd think you'd take whoever you can to be your wife, mknote, sociopath or not.

    And you're not being fair -- you're just white knighting a random girl on the internet yet again.

    Harry is not a sociopath. The author is an angsty fucking girl who doesn’t know the meaning of the word. A sociopath would not feel extreme happiness at getting a picture album of his dead parents, or getting a Weasley jumper.

    He would not feel sadness at Sirius dying, he would not feel sadness over Hedwig dying. He would not put himself in harms way to save Ginny in the Chamber of Secrets. He would not put himself in harms way to save Sirius in Prisoner of Azkaban or in the Ministry of Magic. And he certainly would not trek all over England trying to find the objects to defeat Voldemort. He would get the fuck out of there and save his own skin.

    You know who does exhibit all the signs of a sociopath? Voldemort. He was a juvenile delinquent. He takes pleasure in hurting others. He was extremely charming and used others for his own ends. He neatly avoided going to jail for killing Myrtle by ingratiating himself to the professors and putting the blame on Hagrid. He doesn’t have the capacity to love. Etc, etc, etc.

    You remain as stupid as always, mknote.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 17, 2012
  2. mknote

    mknote 1/3 of the Note Bros. DLP Supporter

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    Okay, first of all, fuck off.

    Second of all, let's break this down into parts:

    One, I am very picky about the people I hang out with, and I'm the same way with girls I'm interested in, so nope. Two, how is it white knighting to agree with someone on the internet who happens to be female? You wouldn't say I was white knighting if she was male, even though my argument would be the same.

    Yeah, I completely agree. I never once stated he was - my statement was specifically confined to Harry's not feeling remorse for killing people is a rather valid reason for not wanting to be around someone. Whether or not Harry is a sociopath - indeed, rather he does or doesn't feel remorse - was irrelevant to what I said, and if she does, in fact, believe canon Harry is a sociopath, then she's off her rocker. I wouldn't know, I haven't read her stuff. All I have to go by is what I've read here and on her profile.

    See my first statement.

    Enough thread derailing from me. Let's let this thing sink into the Recycling Bin or Trash Bin or wherever it belongs.
     
  3. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    mknote... it's everyone around you who's picky about hanging out with you, not the other way around.

    Because I would be wary too about hanging out with a guy who fantasizes about raping people he met online.
     
  4. deathinapinkboa

    deathinapinkboa Minister of Magic

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    Girls! Girls! You're both pretty.
     
  5. Infidel

    Infidel Auror

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    I think this story had a very interesting premise, that of Voldemort and Harry putting aside their differences to work together. I used to look at the story as one where the evil Dumbledore was bought about in an effort to tailor the circumstances such that Harry and the Dark Lord had no option but to work together for their own good.

    This is a situation that I have long wanted to read about. This story provided it. I tended to ignore the abused Harry part to see how well the author could write that story line. In that aspect, towards the end of fourth year, this story peaked. Now it's become an angst fest.
     
  6. BombTheHarbor

    BombTheHarbor Third Year

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    This story is awful. The author has some skill at storytelling but absolutely none at storymaking. Angsty bullshit that drags on and on forever...
     
  7. Portus

    Portus Heir

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    Seems like every post I see of yours, you're shitting on mknote, formerly-ollie and used-to-be-sacrowhatever. I don't know about the delinquency and it's a definite 'no' on the charming but hey, you can still check off 1 out of 3 up there, Sree.
     
  8. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    Yeah, you're right. I'll stop. I'll just take a page outta Mid's book and ban anyone that pisses me off. Thanks for setting me right, Portus.
     
  9. samkar

    samkar Temporarily Banhammered

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    Strange and that's one of my major problems of the story. Harry working with Riddle makes no sense at all even if you only accept the canon history until early GOF.

    Doing it nevertheless requires you to change/redefine so many elements that the universe makes no sense to me anymore. Dumbledore has a lot possibilities to spin him to most needs but Riddle does not.

    In this small society the people who kill each other know themselves and that means you deal with the rules of vendetta. It's always personal.
     
  10. ibskib

    ibskib Second Year

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    interesting story, even if it wasn't without flaws, it was well written, and more polished than most. I liked the creepy psychological angle in the first chapter. All in all it's always nice to see someone writing a platonic Harry/Voldemort alliance, there are enough slash orgies out there.
     
  11. Infidel

    Infidel Auror

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    The story has been updated. There's nothing special here: There are some hints of how terrible the wizarding world is for muggleborns and how incompetent wizards are. That's starting to really irritate me.

    I think the pace will pick up much more once Harry gets back to Hogwarts. At least, I hope so.

    The discussion Hermione has with Thomas was a little too much.
     
  12. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Unfortunately, this fic has managed to become the second fic (no prizes for the first) which I read just to discover what new thing I can rage at in the author's notes.

    Because let's face it, the author's notes are what this fic is mainly about, now. It's really jumped the shark since
    Harry joined Voldemort.

    Things about the fic that you were able to ignore in the past, in favour of the Harry-Moody interaction, tension of being within Dumbledore's power, and the training stuff, have now become the central focus of the fic. Basically the whole fic is now about magic/wizard bashing and fellating Voldemort.

    Though there's no trace of Voldemort here, so many we should call him Tom.

    Changing my rating down to 3/5. The last few chapters merit a 2, but I shall keep it a three in memory of the well written first act.
     
  13. Knoq

    Knoq Temporarily Banhammered

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    Voldemort is known to be a sociopath, and one of the key things in functional sociopaths is that they are very charming and excellent at emotional manipulation. This is hinted at in Riddle's school years where he wraps the staff aside from Dumbledore around his pinkie finger.

    As for the House Elf, again, sociopath, he already views Death Eaters as property, viewing actual property as the same, why not? And why not have property to be proud of, exceptional, interesting property?

    That's the actual danger about sociopaths. It's not the violence and depravity, its that they are usually extremely adept at blending in and acting as they think they need to. They are, essentially, natural Oscar Nominees with homicidal leanings. Slaughtering and eating freshly raped babies or rescuing fluffy kittens from harmless but scary looking spiders, its all the same to psychopaths. Keep this in mind regarding Voldemort in any story.

    The rest, especially with Hurt Harry? Yeah I agree with.

    EDIT: @Taure, um, where exactly did you think this was going? :sherlock:

    ~~~~~~~
    I resurrected this thread, because people all over the site seem to forget that most dangerous part about what actual psychopaths are. They aren't just raving madmen, in fact, they rarely are. Keep that in mind regarding Voldemort in this fic. If it is ever re-read or reviewed.
    It's almost like you can read, but can't understand how words form sentences, and how multiple sentences relate to each other. Amazing. Harry Potter at that point in time represented an existential threat in many ways.
    He deserved it for fucking up horribly. He derserved it in general but thats another topic.
    ....Are you legally retarded?
    Wormtail has a live demonstration of Lord Voldemort being fucking Immortal. Nothing prevents Voldemort from finding another follower after Wormtail releases his shade. But you are clearly an idiot who possibly never read books, any books, in his life, instead having computer programs speak out highlighted and copypast'd material along with story tapes for listening
    No, you sir, are being much more stupid about it.


    I know I flamed him but please, before you infract me, answer me this.

    Where the fuck was Wormtail supposed to go and how was he to ever build up the courage?
     
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2014
  14. ScottPress

    ScottPress The Horny Sovereign –§ Prestigious §– DLP Supporter

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    I know that Library is exempt from necroing, especially if you actually write something that adds to the thread, which you kind of did, but Knoq... I'm just wondering--in your short time here, have you ever seen anyone else revive and ass-old thread? I've been here a year and the only time I saw revives was when a fic updated. For the life of me I can't figure out why you insist on doing this stuff.

    Just because you're technically allowed to do something doesn't mean you should do it. The fic in OP has been on hiatus for over a year, so it's not like there was new material to reply to.

    And you stroll in here with a mission statement, that DLP doesn't know what psychopaths are and needs to be reminded. Dude, there are some very smart people in the ranks, so stop kidding yourself and just admit that you posted because you wanted to call someone a retard.

    TL;DR: you're the most annoying troll I've seen in my time on DLP.
     
  15. Knoq

    Knoq Temporarily Banhammered

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    I was about to recommend it myself before I searched it. So....there's your answer.
     
  16. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    Bumping this thread because it's pretty rare I've 'missed' a story that I think deserves a 4/5 and has been out for years by this point. I came across this story because of the most recent iteration of the "what's your favorite fanfic" thread, here. Got a few other recs out of it that I haven't tried yet as well.

    I started reading this story and at first it seemed like a train wreck going full-speed ahead. Then it went off the tracks, bashed a few characters, and started blazing it's own trail.

    The pacing is rapid at first, so 'stuff happens' fairly often to move away from canon. It's almost a negative at the start because so much of it is just... things happening without much prep work to make them happen.

    There's Dumbledore bashing. There's some Ron bashing, though not extensive (he's barely in the story). Dumbledore is caricature-ish in how he's portrayed. It's one of those where he deliberately screwed with Harry's head to make him into what Dumbledore wanted then he keeps trying to screw with aspects of Harry's life. The Dursley's abused Harry and his injuries from all the malnutrition take up a bit too much of the story at times and grate.

    Story starts after Harry's name comes out of the Goblet of Fire. Shortly afterwards he has some accidental magic that leads to him discovering Dumbledore screwed with his head to alter his personality. I was almost ready to close the story a few chapters in when Dumbledore basically told him that he was going to have extra lessons with Moody several days a week.

    And a few chapters later I realized that I was reading one of the better Master-Apprentice style stories that I've come across in the fandom. I admit that I'm ... what's the opposite of a pet peeve? I like Master-Apprentice style stories quite a bit, so that led to me overlooking some other issues the story had to keep reading.

    It goes into genetics a time or two. Bashes Britain's education system quite a bit. Typical fare with muggleborns can't get good jobs so they leave and Hermione delving into all of that.

    There's good and bad but overall I enjoyed this story despite it's flaws. It's rare to find stories where Harry remains interesting while having solid adult figures in his life helping him out and looking out for him.

    Spoilers:
    Harry sorts out that Moody isn't the 'real' Moody but ignores it because he hates Dumbledore more or less. Barty is a decent sort of person and a good adult figure for Harry. He was raised by Voldemort after a certain age. Riddle and Harry end up being distantly related, and Harry goes to live with him, and... he's cool. I liked him. Pretty sure this story is trying for 'nuance' on both sides and ending up at Voldemort is actually the good guy and Dumbledore and the status quo are the bad guys, but that's not quite confirmed.

    There's some ideas in this story that I haven't seen before. Voldemort keeps his "Thomas Riddle" persona separate from his Lord Voldemort one. As Riddle he looks like a normal person. He's a reclusive researcher and no one noticed he went missing for over a decade because he has a massive backlog of publications that his house elf sent in for him, making it look like he was just at home writing and not taking visitors.

    Lily and James were fighting and Lily filed for divorce shortly before their deaths. Various other little things that I haven't seen often in fanfics.

    Edit: Story isn't complete and may never be, but there's enough there that I feel it was worth my time.

    Also the author's Bio on ffnet has some discussion about an 'unnamed forum' that said mean things about the story. Guessing that was us? Shout out DLP! W00t w00t!
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2020
  17. Johnnyseattle

    Johnnyseattle Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    FFS Ched, I thought this had been updated finally. NOT OKAY.

    I've sent the author a message or two on various platforms, and have never received an answer. Kinda sucks, I'd have liked to at least known where it was going.
     
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