Title: The World is Not Enough
Author: Earl Lonsdale
Rating: M
Genre: Drama
DLP Category: Dark Arts
Pairing: None (one paragraph devoted to three or more 'consorts')
Status: Complete, Oneshot.
Summary: The whispers are getting louder. 'Seize it! Seize it!' The Master of Death accepts his destiny.
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6744291/1/The_World_is_Not_Enough


Brand new oneshot I came across, I loved.

First for review thread I have made, if I made mistakes please point them out.

 

Didn't like it. Descent into madness was rushed and just plain boring. Than we got something akin to "19 years later" with Lord Harry Potter and Ted Lupin as his "lord apprentice" conquering Europe.

Boring and unimaginative. 2/5 for grammar that is decent and you don't want to gouge out your eyes after reading it.

 

I killed a few minutes with it.

It seems like he got an idea and couldn't be bothered to write out the whole story, so he just gave a beginning and end.

Did it have a few bright points? Yes. Does it belong in the Library or even Recycle Bin? No.

I agree with franki; 2/5 at best.

 

Dialogue is fail, no characterization, no style nor substance. Writing isn't acceptable.

The campaign for the world is shit.

There's no sensory detail so the globetrotting doesn't end up doing anything.

Lol, really? All you have to do is set up a ward around the entire Ministry of Magic and the entire place is yours?

There's also the feeble attempt at a plot twist with Victoire's betrayal, but it happens in one paragraph.

I actually thought that the concept, of Dark Lords destined to replace each other through cyclical prophecies was original, but then I realized this plot device isn't at all original (see Diablo, Myth: The Fallen Lords).

1/5 for the ineptness everywhere, no 'bright sparks' to speak of.

 

As was said by others, a few bright sparks flashing in the night, nothing more.

 

Calling out admins here, but you should really restrict the ability to create new threads to established members (I'm not saying that I am one). All of these crap stories are really getting old.

As to the story... well it sucked.

 

Not speaking on behalf of the admins, but to chime in on this suggestion:

So far as I can remember, the creation of the For Review section was for the explicit purpose of having this vetting process. If it were still possible to post fics directly in to the Library then I would agree, but since the point of For Review is to weed out the weak fics, it doesn't seem like there's any harm in weak fics being posted here.

Further, in a fandom which is no longer growing at the rate it used to be, and given a site with ever-increasing quality criteria, I'm not sure if it's desirable to restrict participation more than necessary. We'd just be cutting ourselves off from potentially good fics.

Just my thoughts on the matter.

 

His recent oneshots have been disappointing. Journey Through the Dark was maybe a 3/5 if you were generous, something to pass the time with. Instead of continuing it he writes a couple crappy Dark!Harry oneshots >.>