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Complete Time Braid by ShaperV - M - Naruto

Discussion in 'Naruto' started by Janus, Jul 13, 2009.

  1. Janus

    Janus Groundskeeper

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    Title: Time Braid
    Author: ShaperV
    Rating: M
    Genre: Adventure, Romance, Timetravel
    Fandom: Naruto
    Chapters: 31
    Words: 208,098
    Updated: May 20, 2011
    Published: July 5, 2009
    Status: Complete
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5193644/1/Time_Braid

    Summary: Sakura thought she was a capable kunoichi until she died in the Chuunin Exam. Now she's stuck in a loop, dying again and again while she struggles to understand her strange predicament. How hard can it be to pass one stupid test? Sakura/Naruto/Hinata



    Time Braid is what you get when someone reads Lionheart's Chuunin Exam Day and says to themselves "I can do that better."

    Then does so, with the kind of writing that absolutely blows the reader away.

    Its a Sakuracentric fic, and I guarantee you won't get a lot out of the story if you're the kind of person who loves details details details, but damn.

    ShaperV is quickly becoming one of my favorite authors, largely because s/he can get the point across with a minimal amount of fuss and keep the plot -interesting- while doing it. S/he doesn't seem to take the easy way out on anything, and the 'plot' progresses anyway. I can honestly say that I have seen better work from very few authors, and most of them are professional.

    I could say more, a lot more, but you should all go read it yourselves. Even if you hate time looping stories or Sakura stories, go read it now while its only at four chapters. Its worth the time spent.


    Checked: June 10, 2012
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 10, 2012
  2. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    This is more a list or an outline than a story, although it has snippets of dialogue, I wouldn't really call this minimalism... it's moving so fast, and it's hard to grasp the character development of Sakura (who feels really OC by the first half of the first chapter). It's the skeleton of a story, one with potential for some fun developments.

    I like it, but it's really suffering from the author's refusal to ... write.

    3/5
     
  3. Janus

    Janus Groundskeeper

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    ^^; You do realize that it has been up for about a week now, and that the author has updated four times in that period yes? That's less a refusal to write and more a "This literally just went up."
     
  4. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

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    I think he meant writing details, not writing a story as it were.
     
  5. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    ^^

    One of the biggest problems with Chuunin Exam Day was that the author started going overboard. Naruto was doing this and that without explanation or expansion, he was mastering "tradeskills" and eventually each new chapter became a checklist or an outline. "I woke up and said hi to Sakura then I fucked Hinata then I learned how to cook like an iron chef but Itachi showed up but I did this cool jutsu and dug underground and blew up stuff but he killed me."

    Also, after having read chapter 4 ... well let me say: wtf. This story is getting weird already ... I hope the author can keep it together.
     
  6. Mrriddler

    Mrriddler High Inquisitor

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    The lesbian subtext of course doesn't hurt, lol, yummy. But actually, so far, he's handling it better than one would expect, i.e. minimizing it. He does keep his writing simple and clear, which make it easy to follow and he's rather good at crafting lively scenes.

    He's also got less than 100k under his belt and has only been around for a month. I want to see his staying power before I pass judgment. All too often they flame out.
     
  7. LT2000

    LT2000 Heir

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    For Review exists for a reason, folks. This isn't the first time I've had to move something into it because the OP just decided that it belonged in the archive. Next time I'm just deleting the thread (and possibly giving a warn to the topic creator). Follow the rules, please.

    And the main reason that nothing new has been posted lately is because we generally don't want mediocre fics nominated just so we have 'something.'
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2009
  8. Thorn

    Thorn Professor

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    Location:
    Ohio
    I also enjoy this story. It's like a better Chuunin exam day. Even as we watch through Sakura's eyes, you have to wonder just what the hell Sasuke and Naruto have been doing in their own. When we do get glimpses of them together, we see that Naruto and Sasuke are undergoing character development of their own, but it comes rather as a shock to the reader just like it does to Sakura. Sasuke comes back with the Mangekyo and is a psycho, and the reader has to wonder just what the hell happened that he did. After all, Sasuke wasn't THAT big of a dick in canon at that point. I'm guessing he spent a few loops trying to find Itachi, and likely got his ass handed to him every single time with an extra large helping of mind fuckery.

    I'm eager to see the point where they all loop together. It's gonna be a hell of a fight. Something tells me by that the time they do, Sasuke will have probably ambushed and killed Real!Naruto already, and he'll be looking for revenge.

    On the downside, I'm not a fan of the Sexy Jutsu being thrown around to everyone,

    4/5.
     
  9. Janus

    Janus Groundskeeper

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    Woah, sorry LT. I wasn't even aware we had a For Review section for other fanfictions. Noted.
     
  10. Demons In The Night

    Demons In The Night Chief Warlock

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    I like this story, and do think it is better than Chunin Exam Day, but it moves too damn fast.

    The scenes are pathetically short, there is often little or no reason for the character development, and even though it's on a smaller scale than Chunin Exam Day, it still reads like "so first I mastered genjutsu, then fucked Anko, trained with Naruto and Jiraiya, and got enslaved by Sasuke, etc. etc."

    I think it would be a much better story if the author fleshed out the scenes more and not move the story along at lightspeed.

    Still, it's a light, entertaining read. Sakura/Anko was pretty hot.

    4/5
     
  11. Heleor

    Heleor EsperJones DLP Supporter

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    I saw all the comments about the scenes being too short, and time moving too fast, and I completely disagree with them.

    It's a fast-paced story - partly due to the format, partly due to him/her doing everything exactly opposite to DisobedienceWriter. But nowhere does it feel rushed.

    You even get some sense of overarching story, with Sasuke and Naruto being stuck in the time loops too - but not always the same ones.

    Sakura's about to learn how to implant memories into others, so let's see if this succeeds where Chuunin Exam Day failed.
     
  12. asa

    asa First Year

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    FYI it's been updated. I'm still waiting to see more of this story, but your mileage may vary with this chapter's new twist:

    Enter divine(-descent)!Sakura
     
  13. Ceebee

    Ceebee High Inquisitor

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    I'll probably still glance at this fic, but with chapter 5 its gone from someone that was alright, to something that makes me laugh at the plot.
     
  14. arkeus

    arkeus Seventh Year

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    I...don't understand what's the problem. There is a plot, which is surprising in a naruto fic.

    yes, this twist is Oo, but it seems it's common for ninja to be that, just that sakura got a recessive gene or some such. It's just an explanation, and if it wasn't used by bad authr for naruto, it wouldn't bother you either.

    It's well written, and there seems to be actual growing on hte part of the characters.
     
  15. Mindless

    Mindless Big Boss DLP Supporter

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    This kills it for me almost instantly. I gave it a try anyway, but if Naruto isn't the main character, it's just a no. It wasn't compelling enough to draw me in either (although Lionheart's shitbomb was even less so) and I got tired of it a few chapters in. Not gonna rate it, but I'd give it a 2/5. The premise is decent enough, but Sakuracentric is a massive markdown, and it's just bland.
     
  16. Heleor

    Heleor EsperJones DLP Supporter

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    The newest twist makes me question the story a bit - it might be falling into the same trap the original did - too many people in the loop.
     
  17. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

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    I give this total fail, on account of Sakura.
     
  18. LT2000

    LT2000 Heir

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    Same. It might be the best-written fic in the world, but if it doesn't center on Uzumaki Naruto I will not read it. Even worse is that it DOES center on a character that I actively dislike.
     
  19. Moloch

    Moloch Groundskeeper

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    I disagree. The total fail comes from the ridiculous amounts of Sakura sex, both normally and sexy mode differences noted as well.
     
  20. Clerith

    Clerith Ahegao Emperor ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    /joins the bandwagon.

    Sakura is the Ginny of Naruto. Being a much more prominent character, though, she at least had her character fleshed out much more. I still detest her, though. I won't touch this fic on principle alone.
     
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