I don't think I mind him allowing Daniel to keep relying on him so much so long as when Voldemort appears in front of the school and Daniel is pushed forward to fight him, Harry laughs in his face when Daniel pleds for help and has to admit it was all Harry's doing.

 

I dont think someone has too agree that someone saved their lifes to owe them a wizard's debt. Look at Snape and James. Snape was absolutly sure that james had a part in sending him to the werewolf and when james saved him did he owe james a debt...

I can only hope that daniel is exposed somewere public, like graduation so does death eaters attack and daniel begs harry to save him.

 

The magical Animagus is not a put-off. The real downside is Harry worrying about what Hermione thinks about him all the time. Quite a lot of romance for someone who has been ignored for 6 straight years....seems surreal.

 

Apophis maybe you're right. Although Snape may be blind to certain things because of his anger but, seeing a werewolf attack and then be pushed out of the way by someone tends to give a strong message.

Also Nexus, being Daniel's brother doesn't get someone too many girlfriends right? So ya got to keep the one's you can get and attack any other guys that come at her. Throw a few reducto's around and then see if they think it's worth it!

Oh and to choke a smirf you'd have to have some tiny hands so most people would find out they're red with spots of grey if their blood and brains are the same color as ours.

 

It's not the fact that he has a Magical Animagus that is a put-off, it's what will come after the Magical Animagus. I've seen a bunch of stories that start off pretty good, but then they decide to give Harry a Magical Animagus, which leads to a Super!Harry somehow, which leads to unrealistic H/G and ultimately turns the story into a shitfest. I've had personal reassurance from the author that this won't happen, though, so I still have high hopes for this story, despite the H/Hr. I'm studiously ignoring that part at the moment.

 

I'm finally giving this fic a try.

I struggle to find it even remotely possible that James and Lily and everyone would completely ignore Harry. That with Snape apparently Legilimens-ing Harry and more than likely Daniel, and with everything the Headmaster always seems to know... that they wouldn't bring up the issue of who's responsible for what. That no student even notices the top-of-the-year kid performing all the magic others struggle with.

But it's written simply and clearly and is very enjoyable to read. I've only read the first 6 chapters now, and I will continue to read more. It's just in this chapter was a complete and total stomach punch. It was this:

Oh god. It was that same feeling, when you're enjoying a porno and suddenly, out of nowhere, you hit a scene with two guys. You just feel ill for having enjoyed this so far, but the sheer abject horror and entertainment up to this part just makes you fast-forward and hope you can ignore these bits the rest of the way through.

I mean I know the fic is classified as "Romance" secondarily but our main character Harry hadn't shown any signs of interest in the bucktoothed beaver. I don't even mind Harry/Herman fics. But it's just... it's going to be that sort of romance.

Dear god. Makes me wish I'd just never started it, because it is written eloquently enough with interesting ideas and few grammar or spelling errors. Excellent balance of description and dialogue. No massive paragraphs or exceedingly short dialogue ones breaking up the story. So I will keep reading this. But I've read these things before. And I never liked them the first three hundred seventeen times. Gah.

Oh well. Now that I have a clearer idea, it's not like my expectations can be much lower. Still is a mildly enjoyable read as long as I can fast-forward and potentially ignore the bits that are going to make my eyes bleed.

 

I know what you mean when the movies going and you see these to girls going at it and you're happy and out of nowhere they zoom in on some fifty year old guy with a creepy look and your life line goes from good time to scared for your manhood!

 

Sigh. I think this fic took my lowered expectations as a challenge.

Having read all posted so far (that's to chapter 11), consider my interest in the neighborhood of 'barely any' to 'meh.'

Perhaps as a finished fic it will be enjoyable for me to read. But so far it's nothing but pain, angst, and an annoyingly whiny lead character whose going so far as to bend over and make it easier on the rest of the world. Hermione's every bit as annoying as your average teenage girl and now I'm not even liking this Harry.

Has anything good happened in this fic so far? I reckon I'm supposed to think the relationship with Hermione is a good thing but it's more a matter of these two deserve each other because I don't like either of them.

I mean honestly, is this Harry supposed to be the one to stand up to Voldemort? He's practically begging for glory and attention, even if he wants to get it through honest means for something he deserves. And when he does things that deserve attention and he doesn't get it, he just rolls over and takes all the crap the author keeps shoveling his way. This isn't a hero. This isn't someone to sympathize with when half of the crap he brings on himself for simply letting it all happen. I'm fine with letting Daniel get all the fame and glory if Harry doesn't want it. But this Harry wants it. And the fact that he's doing nothing about it... it's just sad. And pathetic.

Frankly at this point, I'm hoping Voldemort wins. At least he's not done anything annoying. Aside from being unable to spot a disillusioned 4th year. Egads.

Maybe when this fic is finished and there's hopefully some sort of light at the end of the angsty romance-filled tunnel I'll give it a re-read, but for now, no thanks. This is definitely not for me.

5/5 for the grammar, writing style, effort put into spelling and structure. A little originality here too.

1/5 for the plot, story, content, and direction of the fic so far.

Averaging it out to a 3 still seems too high to me.

 

nonjon: Hmm, you're being uncharacteristically hard towards this fic.

I agree that the whole deal with Harry kicking ass and nobody knowing about it (as stated in the summary) is extremely unrealistic ATM, but I kinda hope there's some grand plot behind this; like, Dumbledore knowing all along who the real BWL was and intentionally keeping Harry out of the spotlight, to build up his character (which he otherwise did by sending him off to the Dursleys).

Other than that, I don't think that anything else was too bad. Sure, H/Hr romance sucks in the way that Hermione is also just now noticing Harry (after 7 years together). And Harry's character does seem kinda whiny at times, but it's nicely crisscrossed by interesting bits and quite logical considering his upbringing, so it hadn't bothered me much.

I'm not saying that this story is fantastic, but it's still a nice, above average AU, where you don't have to read million words of canon reevaluation before reaching the good parts.

4/5

 

Hmm it would be interesting if the neglect Harry suffers is from the Potters or dumbledore trying to give him a normal childhood and cast a Fidileus(sp) like spell on him that makes it impossible for people to recognise him as the Boy who lived, so sunndenly all the fame is heaped onto Daniel and even if Harry was to stand in the middle of the great hall and personally kill voldemort while Daniel stood on next to him, all the credit would go to daniel.

I dislike the romance types, as Nonjon said, "its one of THOSE romances". However there are some good points in this story. Ill reserve judgement until it is finished.

 

Chapter 12 is up. It looks like the author is starting to move the plot along with an offscreen attack by the Death Eaters. There's also the Ravenclaw Hufflepuff quidditch match. I do find it disconcerting that Hermione has never once gone to a quidditch match. If I read it correctly Harry may have actually cheated from the stands using wandless magic to slow the Ravenclaw seeker who was given his spot. If so, that is an interesting bit showing that maybe Harry has had enough rolling over and is going to start poking back finally!

I also find his brother's interest in Hermione a bit strange after all, Hermione is an okay looking bookworm and supposedly Daniel is dating Ginny the Wonderslut. I am surprised that Ron the wondersidekick would stomach Daniel cheating on Gin Gin.

Jim

 

I just finished reading the latest chapter of this, I agree its finally moving along, now hopefully the author can use the DE attack to move the plot along to a point were people realize that it was Harry behind Daniel's actions and not just set another scean with Hermione crying in Harry's arms. If not that I'd settle for a show down between Daniel and a few Death Eaters.

 

It seems that the story is starting to move along now. That is very good. I disliked the amount of fluff in this chapter, and I detested Hermione's character, but the rest of the content more than makes up for it.

What I did love was the fact that Harry finally stood up for himself by punching Daniel. That, his homicidal tendencies towards the Quidditch Captain and the fact that he wasn't disturbed at all by cheating during the game are showing a different, and much more attractive, side to this Harry than what we had been seeing since the Mudblood got her claws into Harry.

I'm looking forward to seeing what the school's reaction to Harry punching Daniel and the Death Eater attack and how life will be different for them all now that the story is finally moving along.

 

A truly devious Harry would try and convince Daniel that he is interested in that Rebecca Bradley girl and watch the "Boy Who Lived" take Cornfoot's girl from him. Though hexing his pecker off seems a bit straightforward.

Jim

 

That would be awesome.

 

Indeed it would be.

 

While I agree with many others that it is good that the story is starting to move along now so do I not like this chapter so much.

In the beginning of the story so despite harry wanting fame or glory or what ever it is he wants so did he keep to the shadows and not show off his skills to anyone. in the latest chapter did he suddenly scream to help the hufflepuff seeker right among the ravenclaws, not to mention using wandless magic also among the ravenclaws. Also the entire scene were he punched daniel was strange. It would have been better if he just lead hermione away and then cursed daniel so no one knew it was him.

 

i finally read all 12 chapters of this and it was not bad at all. the fact that harry is a sarcastic and smart ass bastard makes if worthwhile. the pairing is alright because they were not actual friends.

 

Well I just read chapter 13 and it practically ruined the entire story for me. I will wait a few chapters before reading it again to see if it has improved any.

 

The beginning of the fic was promising, was heading into some ass-kicking, but fucking bookworm bringed only senselles snogging. Story is hybernating.

2,5/5