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WIP Wand and Shield by Roarian/Morta's Priest - T

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by Roarian, Jun 4, 2012.

  1. Jormungandr

    Jormungandr Prisoner

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    So you're basing Bruce's history on the 2003 Hulk film, and not the 2008 one that tied into the Avengers movie?
     
  2. Roarian

    Roarian High Inquisitor

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    I'm basing it on the comics, actually. 2003 Hulk did a cheap ripoff of the storyline. :p
     
  3. Jormungandr

    Jormungandr Prisoner

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    Ah - well, the 2003 film blew chunks. The 2008 film is where it's at. ;)
     
  4. Red Aviary

    Red Aviary Hogdorinclawpuff ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    The background Roarian provided here is fairly in-tune with what was presented in the comics, as far as what I know and what Wikipedia tells me.

    EDIT: Damn ninjas.
     
  5. Tasoli

    Tasoli Minister of Magic

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    Didn't like how little Sif was here as new character I thought you would give her a bit more screen time so to speak.

    Otherwise it wasn't bad.
     
  6. The Iron Rose

    The Iron Rose Chief Warlock

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    I think Sif's underutilized, and Harry's a tad too accepting, but the interaction between Banner and Harry was superb.

    Also an exploration of exactly how fucking terrifying and horrible privatized "world peace" is would be awesome too, but to be fair, actually going after that turns a story either stupidly angsty or stupidly political.
     
  7. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    I don't think Harry's "too accepting" so much as he's extremely confident. He has difficulty believing that much of anything in this world can hurt him so long as he is at least semi-prepared for it. I think it works pretty well... for now! Mwahaha. :D
     
  8. The Iron Rose

    The Iron Rose Chief Warlock

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    Eh, perhaps. Which is true, I suppose, but I think he'd do well to be a bit more wary.
     
  9. Ched

    Ched Da Trek Moderator DLP Supporter ⭐⭐

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    Aye -- my point was that I expect it to change eventually, but it will be an example of good character progression when it does. As opposed to changing it from the start.
     
  10. Jester

    Jester Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    I like your choice of Hulk backstory. It fits nicely with the more recent movie. This is kind of how I expected you to blend the Movie verse into a viable foil with depth and personality.
     
  11. Red Aviary

    Red Aviary Hogdorinclawpuff ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    The only thing I'm concerned with is that Bruce's eyes are glowing in the memory. Does this mean he had some Hulk-like tendencies before he was saturated with gamma radiation, or was that memory after the accident? If it's the former, it sounds like Roarian's taking from the 2003 movie a bit, and I'm not much a fan of anything from that film except for Jennifer Connelly as Betty Ross.
     
  12. Iztiak

    Iztiak Prisoner DLP Supporter

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    Like Roarian said just a few posts above you, he's basing it on the comics. The shitty 2003 movie was also based on the comics, but it was shitty. That doesn't mean the comics were.
     
  13. Red Aviary

    Red Aviary Hogdorinclawpuff ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Yeah, I get that, but I don't remember Banner having anything like the Hulk inside him in the comics before his accident. He had some mental issues due to abuse, but he didn't turn into a giant green rage monster. In the 2003 movie he has this weird thing where the gamma radiation only awakens the Hulk that's already been there since he was born, since his dad was mucking around with his genes. I'm just curious as to when the graveyard memory is set, before or after the gamma incident, as it'd clear up that issue one way or the other.
     
  14. Infidel

    Infidel Auror

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    Personally, I prefer the reasons given in the 2003 movie as to why Banner turns into the hulk. It makes much more sense than just gamma rays.

    It also goes along with the idea that the presence of the Hulk in Banner saved his life during the gamma exposure. A normal human should have and would have died.
     
  15. Jester

    Jester Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    The memory is pre accident. He doesn't turn into the Hulk. His eyes glow green big differance. Also it is comic book canon. Ignore the 2003 movie. It was terrible. This story isn't terrible.
     
  16. Red Aviary

    Red Aviary Hogdorinclawpuff ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Well it wasn't just gamma rays in the 2008 movie. This one had Banner and Betty Ross working on a variation of the Super Soldier Serum, which would apparently substitute the "Vita-Rays" used by Dr. Erskine to make Captain America with gamma radiation. Banner and Ross were led along by General Ross into believing they were working on something else, however -- something that would help the body defend against large amounts of radiation. He got overconfident and tested it on himself, and... bam. Hulk.

    So the gamma rays also served to activate something inside him, but it wasn't anything that Banner got from his father, it was something he put there himself.

    It's sort of a combination of the mainstream (where he was caught up in a gamma bomb explosion) and Ultimate origin (where he was working on recreating the Super Soldier Serum for the government, but gamma radiation never factored IIRC), and I like it a lot better than any of the other Hulk origins I've seen.

    EDIT: Anyway, point is that he shouldn't have anything weird or unnatural going on with him until after the accident going by this origin.
     
    Last edited: Jul 18, 2012
  17. Anarchy

    Anarchy Half-Blood Prince DLP Supporter

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    Ok, so I just read through this, having largely ignored the existence of this story. I didn't have high hopes going in, and I'm not one to bandwagon a story. But, even though I know nothing about this universe aside from general knowledge, this was pretty damn good so far.

    The first chapter had probably 6 or 7 grammatical errors, but by the time I finished all the chaoters, I don't think I spotted more than a handful more, so it was pretty good in that aspect. The beginning plot reminded me vaguely of an older humor story (can't remember if it was nonjon, or maybe rorschach's blot - make-a-wish?) where Harry managed to evade everyone and his pursuers thought he was the best they'd ever seen, and Harry didn't even realize he was being followed at all.

    Anyways, I liked plot, even though I haven't see Avengers yet (laugh if you want). The weakest part to me so far was all the stuff involving Hulk, while the stuff containing Iron Man was great, especially the part where he gets back to Starkhouse with Hulk in tow. The parts with Nick Fury were good too, but I wavered between incredulous and impress with how you handled it, but my views on the whole thing is pretty much exactly in line with Harry's thoughts on the situation, so, as a writer, that's pretty top notch.

    So, this is probably the first story I've read in a long time that I felt actually fell in line with the hype and rating. Probably because I don't really know the source material.
     
  18. Roarian

    Roarian High Inquisitor

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    Yes, the beginning has a bit of a Make a Wish thing going on. Mostly accidental, though.

    Also, there's relatively little Avengers stuff in the fic right now, beyond characters and some details. It's basically a marvel cinematic universe crossover so the stories mostly touched on are Iron Man, TIH, and a bit of Thor.

    Btw, did you think the Hulk stuff was weaker because you don't care for the character much, or did you think it was worse as a narrative thread? -curious-

    COol to have your approval though. :D
     
  19. Rumbleroar

    Rumbleroar Seventh Year

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    I finally got around to reading this story, and I've been enjoying it. A couple of things that jumped out at me, but didn't ruin my read:

    1. Harry complains about being rusty, yet easily moves through every situation with casual disregard. Even in combat he seems to be doing just fine, or like when he was just strolling through the Hellicarrier. I suppose I'm just a little confused why you would bother having Harry as a "desk cop" when he still seems to be the Dark Lord killing badass.

    2. Bruce seems like a very... secondary character, despite being right up from like he is main cast material. Maybe that's just my personal take on him from the way I read him, but it seems like he is just there as a sort of after thought. Banner has always been a time bomb in Marvel, but seemed to be able to work within the bounds of a group even as the Hulk. I think once the Author manages to bridge that particular pitfall, it'll make Bruce stand out more as a leading man.


    Aside from that, I've enjoyed it. Definitely looking forward to the next installment.
     
  20. SKsniper128

    SKsniper128 Fifth Year

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    I got the impression that Harry could be 'rusty' by his own standards or by Auror standards.

    But he's using his invisibility cloak and various other tricks stashed in his magic hat against people who have never seen or heard of such abilities before. For example, in Afghanistan loosing a tail is as simple as walking into an alley and apparating 20 meters into another alley down the street, S.H.E.I.L.D. thinks he's some sort of super spy because of how easily they loose him. If he tried the same trick against other Aurors of Deatheaters, it should be pitifully easy to stop him.

    -SK
     
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