Beware the coffee frother of doom, that's all I'm saying.

 

*draws his Pizza-cutter*

En-guarde!

 

Yes! Keep the tradition alive! The threads' power grows with each post!

>_> I forgot what I was going to say here...

 

Hooray for Harry/Hedwig! Anyway, I choose you...




The potato masher. Just because I can.

 

Spork's been claimed by older members since long before you joined bro.

Mine was the plastic sporife (a spork with a serrated "knife" edge for cutting), but I'm trading that in for a new utensil:

The Espresso Machine. Good for bludgeoning, and poisoning... Although I might have better luck with Sushi and Polonium-210.

Sorry... I know it's terrible, but I can't stop laughing about it for some reason... The sheer stupidity of the element used, I mean yeah it did the job, but the point of untraceable poisoning is to hide "whodunnit"; which you can't do if only two governments have enough of the stuff to kill a person, and one of them wouldn't do it while the other has the grudge of all grudges against his ass.

Mother Russia outsmarted herself.

 

Oi! Someone has stolen my Nutcracker!

 

The Toaster. Whats not to like? Bludgeon, flail, garrote, burn, shock, and of course, it makes toast! Back Ye Heathens!

 

Kitchen Shears of kitchenly d00m!

 

A citrus zester. It's nifty.



Easy to put into your pocket, and it shaves all these pretty spirals of lemons, oranges, or something more gory with one clean tug!

Just think of how utterly lovely a skin or intestine garnish would look on a plate. Or you can make these little decorative marks onto someone too, I suppose, with a little imagination.

FTW.

 

I prefer blunt trauma, so I'll have to go with - The Rolling Pin!



Molly Weasley won't see this one coming....

 

True, but that means you have to be in close proximity to her in order to kill her... And what happens when you go after Ginslut? Hmmm???

That's why espresso laced with Polonium-210 (better than Sushi) is by far the more effective method.

*laughs as Ginslut and Co. die horribley painful deaths*

Is now officially evil

*dances*

 

Actually I was more going for the whole "Beat them over the head until their bains fall out and snot runs out their ears" kind of thing. But your way sounds fun too.

 

<- Plastic butter knife of unexpected doom. Classic.

(I'd look for a nifty picture, and give it a bloodied appearance, but m'too lazy. )

 

I choose................the fuckin fridge



Crush them with it then hide there body in there for later

 

FIne, if I cant use the spork, the bread knife will do.

 

Has anyone choosen a
...

...
meat grinder?