I find it irritating when the author uses 'Umbitch' or 'Dumbledork' within their fic. I'm sure there are other names, but these seem the most common.

 

Moldyshorts?

 

Death Nibblers, Death Munchers. moRon.

 

Lmao, thankfully never read that before.

Also, 'Order of the Fried Chicken' or any variation.

 

Write a story like Hallows and Pathos, where Ron is portrayed as generally a good guy, where Hermione isn't a beatified wunderkind, and where you've checked "Harry" and "Hermione" as the main characters in the story, and you'll get an inbox full of frothing, anti-moRon rants from Harmony shippers.

 

My favorite: Order of the KFC

 

Something I find awful is badly written OC's.

 

Yo, instant x when I see "Order of the Stuffed Turkey" or variants.

It's the order of the motherfucking Phoenix. And at it's helm, it's the motherfucking Supreme Mugwump. Bitches!

 

And really, that's not even insulting the Order. It's insulting phoenixes, one of which even saved Harry's life. For shame.

 

I don't actually mind "Umbitch," since she really is a bitch.

The Bobmin is strong in these two.

The first time I read "Order of the Flaming Turkey" I thought it was mildly amusing. It went downhill quickly after that, though.

Didn't you get internet-crucified when that not only went up on SIYE but went on to win the contest it was entered in as well? I can only imagine the vented spleens and fail-tastic dressing-downs heaped upon you for daring to wander off the path of OBHWF on that site.

 

Actually, afaik, it received a mostly positive reception on SIYE (via reviews, idk about PMs). There were a few retards, yeah, but not as many as you'd think.

 

Harmonians. 'nuff said.

 

Most of its negative response was behind the scenes or doesn't exist on the site anymore. There were only a couple of bad reviews, one which crossed the line of propriety to the point that the Administrators removed it. The thread where the contest results were announced was culled to remove a few abusive comments and I fielded a handful of nasty-grams in PM. (According to a staff member I won't identify, there was a petition among some members to have me booted from the site).

To their credit, the SIYE staff were supportive throughout and unapologetic about such a story winning the contest. (It really was a better story than the others). To be honest, I have a bigger beef with Portkey's administrators, who have twice rejected my applications to be an author on the site.

 

Why do so many fan writers believe that Harry's full name is Harold?

 

That is a symptom of changing JKR's protagonist from average-joe to a wealthy aristocrat. In canon, the whole point is that the protagonist is average enough for any reader to identify with him: he's not too handsome, smart, talented, rich or well connected. Of course, in order for such a character to be instrumental in winning a war, both the dark side and the light side had to be made incompetent or a sixteen year old nobody wouldn't have a role to play.

The desire to write a different story, about a character who has bigger dreams than becoming Arthur Weasley, is very understandable. Then, if you're lazy, you give the character a better starting position. So he's smarter, more aware, more curious. Maybe a more useful talent than talking to snakes and flying a broom. His family is important: he has money, allies, land, vassals maybe (if you go that route).

Usually, those stories suck. But then again, most of the stories of any type suck.

 

It's also a more 'posh' alternate for 'Harry' - 'Harrison' is another.

 

I vaguely recall a Harry/Fem!Blaise in which Harry's full name was Heron... exactly. :facepalm

 

I want to see a fic where his full name is Hieronymus.

Lily took a few too many psychotropics when she was pregnant.

 

I read that once.

It's incredibly long and boring, but it has some amusing Ginny bashing.

Harry won't fuck her, so she decides to show everyone that she's preggo with his bastard child by cutting her stomach open in the Great Hall. It's pretty funny.

Link

EDIT: Just in case anybody is interested in the Ginny-cutting-herself thing:

 

Oh, that's pretty awesome.

SelfMutilating!Ginny.