I cringed a bit at the overdone "my wand just reminds me how they died" bit, as it wasn't his wand, and his wand is a part of him, etc. It'd be like looking a kitchen knife and realizing that your friends died when someone stabbed them with a Bowie knife -- perhaps traumatizing, but it'd be silly to jump from there to "I'm not going to use it again." I'd have liked it better if he just slowly stopped using it after going to the Muggle world, b/c he was worried about being seen with it, then eventually realized he wasn't using it at all anymore. But whatever, that's a nitpick.

Er hem. It's readable. There's a lot of exposition, and the author is going out of their way to make sure that Remus can "fit" into the BBC Sherlock's shoes flawlessly.

Makes me think that in later chapters it's going to follow Sherlock BBC canon too closely, however. If the only difference is going to be that we get internal monologue from Remus during John's parts of canon, then that's not going to hold me there. I found myself skimming once we met up with the first episode, and barely read the meeting with Sherlock at all.

Apart from the internal dialogue I saw and wasn't overly interested in, it appeared to play out almost exactly like in the show. Same for the next chapter or two, only we get some attention-seeking internal dialogue from Remus:

"I—I'm not—I'm just saying it's fine. It's all fine." Please say it back. Please say it back. Please say I could be a werewolf and you wouldn't hate me for it.

^The spoken part is a quote from the show. I'm not sure I like the addition of the italicized part, especially as these two have just met. Remus just seems... needy, or whiny, or something.

I stopped reading after Chapter 8.

TL;DR -- The author goes to a lot of trouble to make Lupin fit into Watson's shoes flawlessly, but then continues to simply follow canon BBC Sherlock while interspersing lots of internal dialogue from a whiny/needy Lupin.

My opinion only, of course. It might improve later, once Harry Potter is old enough for school and the timelines (possibly) meet back up, but I don't think I'll get that far.

2/5​

 

Fair enough, and a good point regarding trauma. My knife analogy was not a good one.

But presumably you didn't spend the entirety of your youth (11-17) carrying a knife around and using it dozens of times a day for everything from fixing your hair to doing schoolwork.