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Complete A Cadmean Victory by DarknessEnthroned - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Taure, Aug 20, 2015.

  1. KGB

    KGB Order Member

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    So I was bored and read most of this story.

    The beginning was rather interesting. There were enough interesting new takes on old ideas. My favorites being the sacrifice based blood magic and scenes of Harry having to deal with the Killing curse shattering his soul and having to heal it. Also the way it was implied that Slytherin's portrait really made Voldemort and is sort of doing the same thing to Harry.

    It promised an interesting twist on the usual dark!Harry tripe where he is just killing/torturing people and there being zero repercussions from it.

    And than it all fell off the cliff. The 'sacrifices' that were needed for the blood magic were essentially just Harry bleeding a little bit and than feeling woozy for a day or so, mechanically identical to him just reading some old book in other stories, as there were no real long term concequences to the 'sacrifices'. Besides the one time the author decided that there needed to be a big dramatic moment and for some reason the cost went way way up for a single, rather minor advantage. (It was also rather nonsensical as the advantage he gained was rather counter canon and so felt pointless.)

    The whole soul shattering thing also went away after the first instance with Harry and Fluer just running around throwing around killing curses and Crucio's like they were candy.

    In the end there was nothing Cadmean about this victory as everything Harry gave up was done so willingly.
     
  2. Avada kedabra

    Avada kedabra Squib

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    Characterization

    I like how in this fic instead of going out and bashing, as most authors do, he instead made it seem as though Dumbledore was evil but only through Harry's perspective making it seem as the opinion of Dumbledore being evil only that opinion. Unlike many other fics that try and bash characters as there bashing comes from the narrators perspective, not a characters, making it appear as fact not opinion.
     
  3. Ghosthree3

    Ghosthree3 Unspeakable DLP Supporter

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    By absolute pure luck I stumbled on this today (hours after it was posted), while checking the author's page.

    https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12070367/1/A-Taste-of-Ismenian-Water

    So basically this was the original epilogue and the existing one was going to be the chapter before it, but the author decided to cut this to be more in theme with the story or something.
     
  4. Dicra

    Dicra Groundskeeper

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    I honestly think that the explanation at the end was the best part of the epilogue. Apart from that, it's certainly a better ending than the open one, simply because it doesn't solely consist of unanswered questions.
     
  5. Blacktyler

    Blacktyler Squib

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    Yeah, Dumbledore in this fic is a pretty good example of unreliable narrator. The dark!harry was believable and the romance wasn't rushed, I really liked Katie's character by the end even though she's not the main heroine.:(
     
  6. Agni

    Agni Second Year

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    The prose is good. The author has tried his best to avoid the common cliches but has taken a route much worse.

    The most jarring is the protagonist's complete character change without any plausible motive.

    Further the interactions between characters doesn't feel right.
     
  7. 18E

    18E Squib

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    Its an above average fic that could have been great with a decent editor. There wasn't anything truly offensive (you could forgive, but not forget those...) yet at the same time it felt less than the sum of its parts.

    The good:

    Once the story found its footing it was a great read. The interactions with Salazar, the slow burn with Katie, Harry's unreliable narration of Dumbledore, the author obviously planned many aspects of the plot out. It was a unique look at dark!Harry, and it gets points for effort there.

    Also, for as bad as the ending is, the author must be given credit for finishing the work even if it was with a whimper.

    The bad:

    It's a chore to get into the story, and I wonder if the only reason I became invested in later plot points was because of a sort of sunk cost fallacy. The promise of dark!Harry and his sacrifice based magic is poorly realized and a heavy missed opportunity.

    The ugly:

    To even get into the story you need to make a jump of logic that is completely tell, not show. From there the author spends close to 20 chapters tearing characterizations apart so as to make them fit into his world (including some lines that if I hadn't been forewarned about I would have considered abandoning the story on the spot). For as built up and foreshadowed as the first 60+ chapters are, the ending lands like the thud of an author that wrote himself into a corner and just wanted to be done.

    In summary, above average simply due to good mechanics, a fresh spin on common cliches, and actually seeing the story through to conclusion while being dragged down by its own hubris. 2.75/5.
     
  8. Jon

    Jon The Demon Mayor Admin DLP Supporter

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    You people who like this are daft.

    It was a physical effort to get to the end of the triwizard tournament, and the moment that Fleur sent Harry a portkey and magically cleared up everything between them, was the moment that broke my already tenuous ability to cope with how painful it is to read this guys dialogue.

    Characters are all OOC.

    I think someone @Mishie ? Told me in IRC several months ago that the guy didn't have the ability to simply use 'said' as a tag, and you know what? He's fucking right. I went through several chapters before 'said' even appeared in a word search.

    2/5
     
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