Hmm to be honest..the last 3-4 chapters have been pretty... "meh".. this one especially.

Basically nothing happened in this chapter besides the fact that the vampire homosexuality was a lot more blatant then usual, which has me fearing a regression to the authors yaoi/slash love.
Don't get me wrong.. I still like the story.. I just want something to happen.

The fact that Harry is about to have a throw down with the Fae council, and will no doubt meet the dude who scares Namach.. (god? grim reaper? death? whatever) is promising for future chapters.. just.. not so much for this chapter.

 

I love the fic. I don't mind how far it has drifted from canon, because the changes were gradual enough to ensure that I'm involved with the new world. It's great. The combat scenes are stellar, the characters have depth and colour, the magic is new and nifty - I could go on and on.

 

I love this fic but I think that more attention should be given to the sidekicks and especially to Voldie

 

So wrong.

Thinking it's the unknown ancient that keeps track of the Vampires.

 

I agree w/ uriel. But I do love the magical theory, more imaginative than most fan fiction.

I enjoyed the first fic more. This one doesn't have all the innovative magic, the strange new world, the fantastic adventure, et cetera. But I'm looking forward to the This World and Elves vs Demons conflict. Its gunna be epic.

But the solution is way too easy; pull a 2001, and make Jupiter a sun. Thus wiping out any Demon invasion this millennium (probably doesn't have enough hydrogen and helium to last much longer).

EDIT: No, then it'd burn out, and there'd be no stopping comets from hitting Earth.

 

Why would igniting Jupiter deter the Demons?
Unless you intend to move Earth's orbit - and that would take A Lot of power, a long time, and a great deal more precision than I trust us humans to use. Besides, the elves might have something to say about it.
For that matter, the only way for moving orbit to deter the Demons is if there is communication with the Demon realm. I'm pretty sure that Flairgold said that all the portals are one-way only.

 

Umm the vampire turned demon whats his name that I cant spell and am too lazy to look up. He went through to the demon realm. So obviously the portals cant all be opening only into the human world.

 

Excuse me - I meant, EACH portal is one-way only. That is, all the portals that Rahkesh has seen have been Demon realm-to-Earth. The one that Sharahak fell through appears to have been Earth-to-Demon realm only, or else Sharahak would have been able to return home immediately on landing.
Unless (I have a nasty mind) Sharahak is actually a mole. He could have been brainwashed into loyalty to the Demon realm. He was there for at least 1000 years, I think. It would be perfectly reasonable for his loyalties to shift, simply from assimilation. In fact, that's far more likely than having a complete alien manage to disguise his origin and form a cover identity that held for ... well... A Long Time.

 

You need to get it off your chest Sree. It cant be healthy holding in all that rage. Trust me anger management works.

 

'Igniting' is the wrong word. I meant make Jupiter a small sun.

Your a genius.

EDIT: Little thought, it can no longer be called a indy!Harry. 'Dumbledore's man, through and through' is replaced with 'Aefly/Namach/All of Akren's man, through and through.'

 

The portals are two way. The ones that Rahkesh has seen thus far were simply not powerful enough to hold up to the number of demons coming through. If the portals have limited power, then it is unlikely that they are going to waste that power sending a demon back.

Look at chapter 13 in Changes in a Time of War where Sharahak describes the portal he went through. He said that it was the biggest one he had ever seen, so we can assume that it was powerful. The demons were there to capture more human slaves, so they would come through the portal grab some and then return.

As for Sharakah being a mole, it seems doubtful. The reason he didn't return sooner was because he didn't have Rahkesh there to vouch for him. He would be treated like another demon and killed. I'm pretty sure he has been watched fairly closely as well. People would notice if a demon wandered off for a while.

 

5/5, although my concentration started to wander a couple of months ago. If you read it in one big binge, though, it's fantastic... Really original.

 

Lol.

Be interesting to see I expect a lot of "THIS IS NOT HARRY POTTER" and not much else.

 

Hehe. I think it's saying something about the fic that I'm looking forward to Sree's review more than the next chapter. Update Sree!

Emma versus Miranda: a cage match to decide it all. Which one is *really* worse?
(/me goes off to find and replace a couple of names in one of Big D's mud wrestling fics...)

 

So your #1 complaint is that Harry is acting in an OOC manner. Look at what site you are on.

I'll admit that the beginning is by far (hey it's got a lot to compare to) the worst part of the fic.

You said you'd point out all the plot holes and that's what I am waiting for~


Why wouldn't he have a gun? It's just as useful - if not more so to kill someone quickly. This is a trained assassin I see no reason why he wouldn't use all the tools available to him.

The hidden knife sheath is a minor detail that doesn't make or break a fic.

You could go through any number of fics on DLP and point out stupid little shit like this but I'm waiting for the real 'flame'.

Who knows maybe you'll convert me.

 

I don't remember seeing that gun making another appearance. Plus, that assassin was a Muggle. If it's just another blatantly redshirted characters like that, Harry can kill him by whatever method pleases him.

From what I remember reading, the action was almost invariably great, but the author seemed to go out of her way to be original to the point of being transparent. There was that whole Indian warfare subplot - and I had no idea what Harry + co. was doing over there.

Sree, you could do a weekly flame. You know, make it a site feature.

 

Actually the assassin was a wizard. As proved by this quote