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Dead Link Back To The Place Where It All Began by ZeroTheDestroyer - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Azrael's Little Helper, Oct 2, 2008.

  1. ChuckDaTruck

    ChuckDaTruck Overlord

    Joined:
    May 19, 2005
    Messages:
    1,777
    Location:
    Inside YOUR closet. Go check.
    I don't know why its in the bin as I quite like it.

    I DEFINITELY think you should cut characters.

    Part of the problem is that we have a shorthand for some of the characters. McGonagall we know as a stern, fair, but tough lady. If you mention Dumbledore's "blue eyes twinkling", we all know what you're talking about. But this has SO many OCs. And they simply aren't given enough time to breathe.

    I think what most people don't like is Harry sitting around and stumbling into things (Canon!Harry in a lot of ways). I like the dueling stuff that was interesting, and the "love stuff" is fine.

    IMHO, its all fine as long as there is a sense of movement, progression, and change to the character. If he's going somewhere and is setting goals.

    Ultimately he serves as a vehicle for reader identification. Most of us aren't so goal oriented. Afterall, we aren't at the center of a national war. In fact, most of us go to work/school, see movies, read fanfiction, etc. In addition, wandless!Harry was fun for a bit, although at some point he should either get a new wand (even with trace) or have some kind of a breakthrough. At some point it becomes a bit of a stretch.

    Ultimately, Harry's life should have a lot more shit in it than ours. Give him some big tough obstacles, then let him over come them in an interesting way. He should be trying/shaping his own destiny, as truthfully, so much of OUR lives seem to be shaped by outside forces.

    Make him an outlet. Make this a story YOU would want to read.

    But I like it, so....


    UPDATE SOON!!!

    :)
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2008
  2. ZeroTheDestroyer

    ZeroTheDestroyer Auror

    Joined:
    Nov 2, 2008
    Messages:
    666
    Location:
    I am getting there
    I am working on cutting a lot of people out, frankly after reading my story I was scared at what I had created, There are so many suspense and holes in it and made me pretty angry at a lot of points becuase I leave so many things hanging.

    I'll try to update, but the next update will probably be a remake of the entire fic, but with an additional 6 chapter at the end to conclude the story, I am more or less at the end of the story at least for this arc.

    At this point my feelings on this fic don't really matter too much, I honestly just want to write a good fic, post it, and then work on the next book.
     
  3. Innomine

    Innomine Alchemist ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 27, 2007
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    2,336
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    Male
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    New Zealand
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    4,500
    Hmm, i've avoided it as of the reviews, but I do like the idea.

    If you did post a rewrite, i'd definitely read it.
     
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