Title: Becoming Harry Potter
Author: Stjernefald
Rating: T
Genre: Adventure
Status: In Progress
Summary:
AU. Harry Potter, a Slytherin with the temper of a Gryffindor, finds himself cast into the flames of prophecies and ancient machinations of shadowy societies. Forced to endure the attention and wrath of the Dark Lord Voldemort, Harry must forge himself in darker hues… but beware, Harry Potter, sleep is merely Death being shy. And dreams… are his visions.
Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12174463/1/Becoming-Harry-Potter

As indicated in the summary, Harry has been sorted into Slytherin, together with Ron, who joins him in Slytherin more out of loyalty than out of any inclination. A central feature of the story is the friendship between Harry and Ron, the - at this point in the story - antagonistic relationshipwith with their classmates and the adventures they live through. Harry is more powerful than he is in canon, though the origins of his instinctive feel for magic remain unclear at least in the first few chapters. Every reader will probably have a strong suspicion where this instinct comes from. And while Harry is indeed very talented - far more than his classmates - this is not a Super!Harry that can simply brush any obstacle aside. He will be challenged, at times more than he will be able to handle on his own.

Not everything has changed from the books. The first year is still about the Philosopher's Stone, but the author has written his own story that begins to look notably different to the books from the beginning. Harry and Ron are quick to figure out that the Stone is in danger, but the steps they take to protect it are suspensful. The author has created mysteries and shadowy figures beyond the ones that exixst in the books. So far, it has been exactly what the Genre suggests: a tale of adventures that are a pleasure to read.

The writing is good, though at times I wonder if it is not a bit too elaborated. I have come to enjoy his style, but a native English speaker may feel different. It could be argued that it is too early to suggest this for the library as it is still in comfortably in First Year, but there have already been nearly 80 000 words published. The author seems to have found either the time or the muse to really work on this story, as it has been updated three or four times in the last two month, so do not be fooled by the puiblication date (2016).

This is the best updating HP fanfic that I am aware of and I have given 4 stars to reflect that. If this fic becomes as good as I hope with the updates to come, I expect to upgrate it to 5 stars.

 

I've taken a quick read through the first few chapters, and I think this story has some interesting ideas but tough execution. The Author can't seem to find a single tone, and often switches tenses between first person and third person. The scenes also come together in a dis-organized manner, and there are times where I'm not sure what's going on. I can understand some of the writing issues being attributed to someone who isn't a native English speaker, but the Chapter and scene construction still leaves much to be desired.

For me, it's a 2.5 rounded up to a 3. It's certainly interesting, but not library worthy imo.

 

Yes, I understand what you mean.

The author seems to have made some changes to his story today or yesterday. He changed the story from being written entirely in the first person to the third person and attempted to tighten the prose of the first chapters a bit.

While I applaud the change to the third person - I generally prefer it in HP fanfiction - there seem to be some sentences he forgot to change. The correction the author attempted seems to have lead to some disruption, I would have to read the first few chapters again to be sure. But judging from the first chapter alone, it feels as if the writing is no longer from the same mould.

In my post above I wrote that the author used a very elaborated style at times - this seems to have disappeared, but the author may just have gone too far.

That being said, what inspired me to open this thread today was the newest chapter published that I read today. It has been written in the third person without any belated corrections or changes, and this chapter, in my opinion, is very good. In this chapter we are being lead through the culmination of the struggle for the Philosopher's Stone.

It shows what the author is capable of if he manages to continue his story without any belated changes in the perspective.

 

I went in expecting an overdone fic from the summary, and I got what I was expecting. It's a firm guilty pleasure fic, if you enjoy a powerful Harry going through Hogwarts. But it's overdone. Harry doesn't need to really work for anything. Harry "feels" magic and as a first year that's been to only a few classes, can manage a shield charm in two tries and can detect legilimency from Dumbledore. Oh, and he can cast spells to do anything he wants without knowing about them. And it's not just Harry's ability with magic that's overdone, everything about the story feels overdone.

2.5/5 for me, rounded down.

 

It actually gets better as it goes, and the latest chapter is pretty good.

The early chapters are terrible, with contrived poorly explained events, typos, and worst of all an occasional slip into first person. Sort of good writing, with terrible editing.

Pet peeve of mine is Molly Weasley apparently refuses to write to Ron at all? For no apparent reason? If I remember right, this is brought up several times, and never explained.

Weirdly enough, the story seems to warn the reader, in character, that Daphne Greengrass will be poorly written, and she is.

I'll say 3/5 but I'd almost say 2/5. 3/5 is mostly in hopes that new chapters will be good like the recent chapters, and not bad like the early chapters.

 

When reading this for a little while I thought the rare first person thing was maybe because the story was written in first-person-horcrux and it was getting confused. It would've fit with the little comments going off in Harry's head, and it always seemed to happen when things were exciting or tense. A little sad that it's just typos.

As for the rest, I'm not done with it yet and I have mixed feelings so far. I do like this Ron quite a bit though.

 

Honestly I really enjoy this story. It has some unique takes on some cliches. The grammar aspect isn't really something that concerns me but that's probably because I grade high school essays all the time.

I would rate this a 4/5. The latest chapter certainly is poised to expand this world greatly.