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Complete Browncoat, Green Eyes by nonjon - Firefly - M

Discussion in 'The Alternates' started by nonjon, Mar 23, 2006.

  1. Heleor

    Heleor EsperJones DLP Supporter

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    To be honest, I have never imagined pensieves as having lids. They are almost always described as just a bowl with inscriptions around the outside.

    I'm too lazy to search for the actual passage, but if a Pensieve had a lid, would it be shining when not in use?
     
  2. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    I think I remember Dumbledore's pensive having a lid at one point in time, but after that had the lid disappered.
     
  3. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

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    Yeah... I don't remember any lids in canon. I mean the first time it appeared, Harry was waiting in his office and the shiny-ness caught his eye (silly Harry - course in my fic that's why he got Mr. Universe). He fell in not knowing what it was and did the stupid 'trying to talk to the memory' thing.

    Don't remember a lid when we saw the prophecy or when Snape left it out for Harry to stumble across. HBP may have had one... but I've not worked up the nerve to re-read that fic yet.

    And I don't want to make Harry a complete emotional!wussy. But it's not exactly a completely genial person in a good mood that says goodbye and puts themself into a magical sleep, only wanting to be woken when he can be "useful." And while's it's been centuries for everyone else, that was only two years ago for Harry. I have a habit of wanting everything to work out in the end, and resolve most conflict probably too quick for that reason. It's why I can't write a Draco or a Snape getting the best of Harry. Or even a duel where he loses horribly.
     
  4. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    Great chapter as usual... But I thought that the crew might have been more intrested in seeing memories of The Earth that Was, but maybe that will happen later?
     
  5. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Yeah, that's what passed through my head too. Maybe incorporate that King Kong omake to show them New York? I haven't gotten an impression that Firefly world has urban jungles like that.

    Anyway, good chapter overall, I liked both Duncan and the Quidditch scene.
     
  6. Litha Riddle

    Litha Riddle Banned DLP Supporter

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    I really liked the fight scene in this chapter, as well as the Quidditch match.
    I liked the idea of Duncan. I can also understand why Harry would respect him, despite his youth.

    After all he encounters so many obstacles in canon because of his age.
    Although I also thought they'd want to see Earth, although I was expecting the patroni scene.
    You tricked me with the multiple perspective, which was a pleasant surprise for me.

    I am really enjoying this story and must now agonise for another chapter.

    Great work,

    Litha
     
  7. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

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    Traveling through space takes time, so there'll be a few more pensieve memories. And while the outer planets are more dusty and wild west frontier town sorts of things, the core planets are futuristic metropolitan mega-centers. Bellepheron for instance, where Durran Haymer is, are actually personal floating islands a few hundred feet above the ocean. Very upper class stuff. Ariel has parks for sword duels, ballrooms for spiffy parties, and a pretty standard concrete jungle sort of city, with junkyard (to make the fake medical ship) and a pretty normal hospital.

    Maybe I should describe the place more, next time we visit Durran.

    And the keys with the pensieve is that Harry's trying to show nice things, and pleasant stuff about the wizarding world. Things like attempts on his life as a youth only make him look more special. First views of Hogwarts get colored with Malfoy's racist remarks, or first views of Diagon Alley get colored by crowds of people shaking Harry's hand and pointing and whispering, etc... Even riding Buckbeak gets ruined by Malfoy. I mean, if you're trying to show the beauty of the wizarding world, Harry's life (as canon goes), is one of the least representative or poor examples you can find.

    The crew will ask to see more things, but they're still wrapping their minds around the concept of the pensieve. I think I may take advantage of it to project on a wall and then, well, a 2 hour memory is a perfect copy of any movies he's seen. Bootleg magical copies!
     
  8. DarthBill

    DarthBill The Chosen One DLP Supporter

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    :D
    Harry's biography. I imagine that if I were him, I'd make sure not to let the rest of the crew read it. Nice chapter.
     
  9. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    great chapter as usual. Amusing with River's crush and Rivers "puberty" gives a reason for it not being anything more then a crush. Also cant wait for them to get their hands on Harry's biography.
     
  10. core8ball

    core8ball Squib

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    I just gotta ask, will Simon take River aside and try to give her the Birds & the Bees talk? Or try to get Inara to talk about preventive messures?
     
  11. Lord Blackmore

    Lord Blackmore First Year

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    Incredible.
    This fic has it all; it's original, light-hearted yet serious at the right times, highly entertaining,... you even start to implement a credible whiff of romance.
    If I had a hat I'd take it off for you.
    It's been a while since I last read anything as enjoyable and mesmerising as this. I believe you even got me hooked on Firefly.... o_O
     
  12. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

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    Sadly no. The last thing Simon would want to do would be encourage her. And River knows plenty about the hedonistic delights of intercourse. It's just a feeling and emotion she's never had herself. Nor a desire. I suppose you could say she finally caught cooties.

    As much as Harry might want to keep the biography from them, it's not really fair. Not to mention, Harry wants this particular biography for personal reasons as well.

    Glad you liked it Lord Blackmore. I'm happy to spread the Firefly love. There's still lots of people holding out for more episodes or another movie, including me. We just gotta think positive!
     
  13. Lord Blackmore

    Lord Blackmore First Year

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    I'm with you 100% on this, Nonjon :)
    I heard about an enthousiastic fanbase revolving around the series as well as the movie before and as soon as I saw a four-starred rating of a crossover with your name on it, I checked as many sites as I could in order to keep up with your story.

    I'll go and watch the movie "Serenity" the second I return from China ;)

    I know you must have gotten this more times than you could possibly count but... Keep up the good work!
     
  14. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Let me guess, it was written by Luna, as a way of pranking Harry (eg. overblowing his achievements etc...)...
     
  15. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    Great chapter...

    Will harry somehow go along on the ship heading for Earth that Was and find some important clues about the wizarding world?

    It would be cool if the wizarding world lived on earth but had cloaked it with magic to make it appear uninhabitable for muggles.
     
  16. ip82

    ip82 Prisoner

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    Heh, yeah! That whole "world blowing up" thing could have been just a big hoax to get the planet rid of Muggles, orchestrated by some new Voldemort. That Hogwarts - the History book was probably so they could get rid of all the mudblods and blood traitors too.... or not.
     
  17. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    i dident like this chapter as much as the others, not because there was anything wrong with it but more because not much happened.

    Also why steal the ship that is heading for the Earth that Was, why not simply
    apparate onto the ship and once it has taken off modify the memories of
    the crew to make them belive that he was some high goverment worker and then when they return so does he remove all memories of him.
     
  18. DarthBill

    DarthBill The Chosen One DLP Supporter

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    Because that's not as much fun, and because his friends couldn't come if he did that.

    I liked this chapter. I just hope that River was actually kissing a ghost, rather than being crazy before the government got a hold on her.
     
  19. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    While you have a point about it not being as fun as just stealing the ship so would it be much more simple. Of course it is not as fun to read about simple things but it could still be amusing having Harry walking around on the ship with no one knowing who he is.

    I seam to remember it being mentioned in the Hogwarts, A History book that he found that hogwarts was getting very strong shields setup around it, if harry manage to make his way to the earth that was so is it possible for him to find hogwarts intact even if the planet is uninhabitable.

    Also one thing I forgot to mention about the chapter is that I liked the explanation why humans had to leave earth.
     
  20. nonjon

    nonjon Alumni Retired Staff

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    This chapter I thought was full of plot bits, and explanations for things that hadn't come up yet (Harry's appearance, the alleged conditions of Earth-That-Was) mixed with some history on this Harry from the book, some history from Harry himself, and Simon warming up to Harry. And of course a brief mention of a character who'd not come up in 20 chapters.

    I mean before now, no one even really questioned why someone would abandon the world they know and go to sleep. While those reading it have hints from the Prologue none of the crew had much idea. Not a lot of action/fighting stuff but probably more forward plot development here than in most chapters.

    And one thing you should realize is that they're not stealing the "hyperdrive" ship. They're hijacking the field test. You gotta realize a new technology, a new fuel, a new energy source, etc... There ain't going be gas stations to refuel the thing. They're not going to have a ton of knowledge on how it works, etc... they're just strapping themselves in for the ride.

    When they get back if the ship doesn't return, they could be in big trouble. But if it's returned and they never realize what happened... then things can go real smoothly. Gotta think these things through. Of course the odds of everything going according to plan are pretty low.

    Not to mention, it's not like they know anything about the ship yet, where it's located, when/how it's taking off etc... Need more info first. And Harry definitely wants them all to come. Now that these are the first people who know the real Harry and what he's trying to do, these may be the only other people in the verse that know magic is real. This ain't an Independent Harry, nor is it really a dependent one. But taking care of River has helped him more than anything else so far. That's sort of the first progress and justification he's had for sleeping away the last 3-4 centuries.
     
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