I think it's because most people think that due to the wizarding world looking to be about a hundred years or so behind the 20th century in social/cultural terms, everything is patriarchal with the father/eldest male leading the family (see - tradition).

That includes the traditional roles of 'breadwinner' and 'house-wife' for working class families (see Arthur and Molly), rich aristrocats along with their ladies (Lucius and his wife) and their roles in society, signing contracts/making decisions for the family, etc.

Most pure-bloods (especially the Malfoys and Blacks, judging from what little we actually know of them) seem to especially follow this 'theme', so there is some sort of canon evidence to back it up, vague as it all is.

However, since it's not outright declared, for all we know the women of the family could be the ones making the decisions behind the men in the wizarding world. Unlikely, but not impossible due to what little we actually know.

On a more personal level, I can easily accept/understand that -whilst not officially having any say in the matter as it's her father's ultimate decision- Calypso can influence her father in some way, little or not.

Basically, if Calypso wants Harry, she'll have her father's backing - made a lot easier if her father wants him in the family/as a match to his daughter, also.

 

Isn't Calypso's mother dead? By default everything has to be approved by her father, regardless of custom or precedence.

 

I gave my reasons, so I thought I made it pretty clear. I figured I would leave a solid review considering how many fanbois this beast has. I think a little less thorough and I would have had the jackals on my balls. Which, I did anyway, so no surprise then I guess.

But it boils down to this. All there is so far is set-up. Harry learning magic, going to school, meeting friends, etc. There has been no major conflict besides drama. If the writing were better, I would have given it a 4/5, but it's just plain.

I think many on here get caught-up in the potential of the story, "Harry's going dark! 5/5!" Add the fact that Harry is intelligent. "He's so smart! 5/5." And he's powerful with magic. "He's awesome, not super!harry, but still powerful! 5/5." It hits three things that most DLP'ers want to see with Harry in a story.

But, like I said in my post, when that point of him going dark begins, or we see more than just drama between friends of family, namely an antagonist, I'll probably up my rating. Then it would become more interesting.

There are several stories on here that capture my eye better than this one, with an engaging plot and very well-written. I'm sorry you don't like seeing this get anything less than a 4 or 5, but I try to be objective as possible with a story.

 

See, I completely disagree with you there. The thing I like most about this story is that its... simple. It's not trying to be more than it can, it's not trying to be an amazing dark!harry, with awesomeness mixed through. It's just a believable tale of a young kid trying to make the best for himself in life.

Of course he's going to be a step above everyone else, of course he's going to make him stand out from the rest of his pairs, but it's done so in a realistic way. Besides Harry's inherit intelligence, he does work for everything he's gotten. And it hasn't been easy either.

I think it comes down to the fact that this fic is almost completely character based right now, whereas you seem to be trying to find an overreaching plot arc.

 

That's a fair point. I am looking for an overall plot, in the way of tension. I'm drawing a lot of comparisons from canon to this, considering this is almost a canon-rehash given Nathan's role, and with Canon there was always some main tension with each year. Yet, I can't help but feel that this is so far just a set-up for something big around the corner.

If I'm right, the tension between Harry and Nathan will only increase as the years go by. I also get the idea that there will be some competition between them in the fourth year. I could see Karkoroff(sp?) trying to get Harry as a participant in the Tournament based on the fact he's taking such advanced classes. Would love to see that, personally.

 

The problem is not Calypso's father signing the document, but the fact that the other signatory is Harry rather than his father or mother. It means that Calypso's opinion isn't as important (or equally unimportant) as Harry's just because of her gender.

 

I don't think it's not so much about the gender. Right now, Harry is just "courting" Calypso, so there's no real deal involved, it's just that Calypso's father is aware about their relationship, so he can give his opinion on the matter, Harry's parents are not. But if it comes to a marriage contract, it would be up to Romulus, James and Lily to agree with it.

 

Coming from a culture which still practices arranged marriages (hopefully similar to what was practiced in Europe and Britain earlier), I'd say that it's outside the norm for this to happen. The agreement is between families and is formalized between the fathers of the two people involved. The mothers have no real power over it except for the direct power they wield over their husbands. To change "fathers" to "heads-of-families" is ok in my opinion, but looking at it from a traditional angle, I'd say that having the boy sign the contract is highly improper.

So Random Shinobi, in a real arranged marriage, the opinions of the boy and girl are equally unimportant. Hopefully it'll be the same in this fic.

 

In some ways, you aren't wrong. This is, as was mentioned, definitely a character piece so far, and so the strength of the piece certainly hinges upon the strength of the characters we are given and the relationship crafted between us, the readers, and the characters. This is certainly the strength of the piece to this point.

But the thing is, no matter how strong or interesting the characters are, at some point something has to happen. Not that NOTHING has happened, but it does feel as if we still haven't hit the major plot arc - we're still leveling up before we get to find out who/what the final boss is. It has been handled well, certainly, but the overall piece lacks a little bit of tension at the moment, upcoming detention notwithstanding.

And so, I guess what I'm getting at is that in a lot of ways, despite however many words in we are, this fic is still hard to rate. Is it good? Yes. Will it be great? I don't know. And I don't think anyone does.

It certainly has potential to be at the top of the list. I can only hope it will fulfill that potential.

 

Unless they wait so long that Harry is of age, and then Rosier can sell his daughter directly to the groom instead of to the Potter patriarch for his son. But I understood that the girl must be sold before she is of age herself, so that seems unlikely.

The question is, by "marriage contract", do they mean a dynastic marriage between clans or merely the transfer of property (brood mare of good breeding)? Since Rosier is an important family and Calypso is her father's only surviving child, is she the Rosier heir? Or is her husband? Or her male child? Or a distant male cousin? If she can become the head of the Rosier family the way an English princess can become a Queen Regnant, it's quite different from a situation when she is only a way for a man to get her father's money (or give his son her father's money).

 

... God I was sitting here for a minute actually considering how I would have reacted if you'd actually taken Schweinsteiger as name... priceless. But yea, I agree with Sesc. It's a valid German name, but not one that would indicate towards aristocracy or a family with some sort of history that they are proud of. Too common.

List of German surnames that might work better(if you're interested and/or Sesc didn't send his PM yet)

Spoiler

Schürenhofer; Barknowitz; Gassdorf; von Edlach, if you want some hint of aristocracy

 

Hepzibah Smith, that Tom Jr Riddle killed (HBP), was Hufflepuff's descendant. Perhaps I'm wrong, but if Smith works as a name for a one thousand year old aristocratic family then Müller won't be that much of a problem.

 

So, I have been reading your story since the first chapter, but never took the initiative to write about it. The writing in itself is very solid, throughout the entire story. The characters are very intriguing and well portrayed, the first Dark Harry story that has some believable motive for Harry going dark and starts at a good place. (Not some stupid disgusting nonsense like being raped by the Dursley, befriending Malfoy for no reason or something like that...I'm sure you get the picture...) Perhaps the first 'Twin' story I have seen in which Harry's parents are total bastards to him, forgetting or mistreating him, and being totally out-of-character form what we have heard of them.
Basically the story is a 5/5, and I'm interested to see how it will turn out.

Also I would like to point out a two minor inconsistency, which I believe nobody has pointed out yet: Kosarev's first name is given as 'Armando' and 'Alexander' in different chapters and the same stands for Rosemburg as well: In the previous update he is referred as 'Audemar' yet in the newest update Karkaroff calls him 'Nikolai'. I thought they may have two given names, but I would find it odd, that they are called differently by others, it would be like someone calling Harry 'James', which would be weird.
Well, that's all and respect for the marvellous work:
SLC

 

Fucking this. What counts as a plain name in muggle England means dick-all about someone with that surname in wizarding England. Same should apply to Germany.

 

Also, another common enough name; Black. (Shortened form for Blacksmith, although obviously that's not what JKR was going for by using that name).

 

Australia is where they sent all the dark wizards hundreds of years ago. If Australia is full of a fuckton of normal deadly animals, imagine what sort of crazy ass magical animals there are. Worst Punishment Ever.

 

So, I read the chapter. Someone probably pointed this out already, but I found this:

The last few chapters revolved around Harry/Calypso, and while I can always see how well they are made, I don't like Calypso, so I'm rooting for a change of pace.

 

Totally agree. I'm glad I'm not the only one not on the Harry/Calypso bandwagon. Besides the fact that they're thirteen year olds concerned about marriage of all things, Calypso really just rubs me the wrong way. The whole withholding information thing from a few updates back pretty much turned me off her as a character, regardless of how well crafted she is, not to mention that she is pretty much a straight up bitch to everyone but Harry. I just can't bring myself to like her.

On topic: a change of pace was what these last few updates were, more of a break from epic magic learning and more character driven IMO, but a return to that learning would be much appreciated. I'm choking on all the damn fluff.

 

I agree, I hate romance in any story. I usually end up skimming those bits before eventually losing interest. Hope that doesn't happen as I've really enjoyed it so far.

 

Well, there is small group supporting Harry/Kira.

Aside that, I think this story has a similar problem that I have with Renegade Cause though for different reasons. It's just not working so well in an episode format. We've waited almost two years since this story started for more action in Harry's life and still got nothing. But once you will have a chance to sit down and enjoy a story as a whole these early chapters will be just awesome setup for future events.