I must say, i've come to the conclusion that I can't really expect updates, especially with what you said about how busy you were until december. Sometimes expecting the worst leads to the most amazing surprises.

Fantastic update. I liked how you managed the boat, it was both suitably unique and didn't drag on what so ever. The description of how the age line works will thankfully shut a lot of the retards in this thread up for a brief moment of respite until they find something equally inane to discuss in great depth.

Dumbledore was surprising I must say. I really did enjoy his portrayal in this segment, and can't wait for more.

 

Shame. A real time chapter would be awesome.

As for the ways to beat the Age Line, I think it would be funny if all Harry needed to do is use the first charm he learned at the Hogwarts and Wingardium Leviosa his entry into the Goblet.

 

There's lots of thing's I didn't like about this chapter, either they were poorly written, poorly thought out, or just not very good.

-Dumstrang ship. It had the potential to be neat, but it felt flat and was boring. There was really no point to the scene other than to mention that Harry could repair an enchantment, but you didn't actually show him doing anything.

-Veela allure. I'm not sure why you even dedicated several line of conversation to that, especially since you wrote it like Harry was shouting down the table like "Fire in the hole!" seems rude to me, or just poorly written.

-description of the Goblet. A large wooden goblet encrusted with gems and engravings... that's what you call 'unimpressive' ? ok

-Dumbledore dragging Harry away, before he could talk to Viktor, and the whole scene afterwards when they are in his office. Way too contrived, and the conversation was a bit cringeworthy as well. Lots of spitting out words in anger, lots of overselling emotions, talk of what is easy and right... there's a lot more to it than that. It looks to me like you took the easy way out when writing the scene.

So yeah, I've been looking forward to the Triwizard Tournament for this story since it was revealed that Harry would go to Durmstrang, but the lead up to it so far is disappointing.

 

Just finished the update. I liked it, the Dumbledore/Harry scene in particular. Unlike Lord Anarchy, I didn't see it as particularly melodramatic, perhaps because we know how much this means to Harry and he's with an old friend, someone around whom he can let his guard drop a bit. Dumbledore in his youth was every bit as competitive and thirsty to prove himself as Harry, so his knowing that Harry's there to compete and not just to see his brother worked for me.

Now, of course, I'm curious how Harry's going to manage to move the Goblet outside the ward in order to defeat it. I suspect it won't be summonable, because that would be way too easy. If I had to bet, perhaps switching spells and his transfiguration discovery, putting feet on the goblet and having it walk outside the ward on its own.

 

Either fix, or patch. Maybe "help" instead of "fix" would work too?

Should have a question mark thar.

...




Awesome chapter is awesome. Finally at Hogwarts. Thought not much happened, it was satisfying to say the least. Keep it up, Santi.

P.S: Am I the only one getting the tag-along vibe from Calypso in these chapters?

 

Brilliant writing, as per usual, and happy birthday. My own was recent and I'm a little sad to say that this is probably the best gift I've received so far.

The only qualm I have with the update was the Viktor/Kira interaction. I'm not sure if it's you wanting to give canon a shot with some Viktor/Hermione action or something else, but the strained interactions between them seemed to come out of left field.

These two sections stuck out to me. They came across as a bit forced IMO. I don't remember any real friction between the two before now (someone correct me if I'm wrong), and I expect we'll get the full story later, but it seems a bit contrived right now.

Great update otherwise.

 

I think some of those "his grandfather" should be changed to other things, like "the old wizard", or something.

 

When I read the boat scene and Harry walking into the Headmaster chamber I could imagine Karkaroff disabling whatever enchantments to mess with his pupils. Besides the training exercise, it wastes time and might be really entertaining.

 

It shows their close relationship. That was how Harry thinks of Albus, and conversely that's how Albus thinks of him. Their relationship adds another interesting dimension to the story, although not (yet?) a central one.

EDIT: sorry, didn't see the "some of those" part. Nonetheless, I found it fine, especially as we don't tend to see much of Albus, and this further cements that relationship in light of Harry's anger at that time, and his further development.

 

I have loved the new chapter, and I hope you update soon, Santi.

The conversation between Dumbledore and Harry seemed to me very bright, although I see somewhat forced Karkaroff's output (though he can not bear witness to that conversation, as is normal to be there to prevent they talk about the Goblet of Fire).

With regard to a magical way to circumvent the age line, I'm completely lost. I hope Santi surprise us with his method.

Personally, the only thing that was happening to me is that the minor student would make a ball with his parchment (which should have its name and the name of its school) and it look to score in the goblet of fire.

PS: Happy Birthday, Santi!

 

If it's another obvious answer like asking someone else then it could be as simple as levitating your name in. A more advanced method may improve his chances if Albus is correct.

 

Any attempt Harry is going to make must impress the Goblet in all four criteria!

Magical prowess- it must use powerful or advanced techniques,
Daring- element of danger in attempt
Reasoning- it must be a way to enter and exit the circle, while entering himself, but leaving it intact and working.
Courage- it must be done while others watch, so will see if it failed.

HArry asked for a way around the line not through it, so it has to be something other then finding a way to simply walk through and enter.

HArry could animate his piece of paper in to origami.

Harry is having to deal with a ward, what can he add to it to make it work for him.

 

Is it just me, or do Syed's posts resemble those of fanfiction.net reviews?

 

I could actually see Harry doing this, it would definitely show everyone else how talented he is. The problem with this is that it is against the rules and Dumbledore would have to react in some way. Once the goblet actually selects Harry as Durmstrang's champion his participation in the tournament is secured, but before that?

I somehow hope that Harry isn't going to be a champion. At all. It would certainly open up a lot of interesting possibilities.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to how Santi is going to surprise us.

 

First, Happy Birthday!
Great update, as usual. I have to say I love harry's strong will, his desire to learn, to know, to win, his desire to be the best. That, and his strong self-confidence are what make this story so unique and so great!

p.s.
The unique plot line also make this story freaking awesome.

 

Nah.

HArry can show his magical prowess by designing a magical trunk.

HArry can show his reasoning by having Dobby help him.

HArry can be daring by adding these girls to his harem: Hermione, Ginny, Susan, Cho, Daphne and Tracey.

HArry can show courage by-



EDIT: for those of you who aren't authors, there's a reviewer out there whose reviews resemble what I just posted. I combined him with Syed for the ultimate fail.

 

Dumbledore's reasoning as to why the goblet would not choose Harry sounded like a lot of bullshit to me. So Harry would be automatically disqualified by asking someone else to place his name in it, yet if he were 17 and simply dropped his name in he would have been fine?

I always thought that the cup was meant to choose the champion most capable of representing his school and winning the contest, not someone who simply had a Very Good Day. Even if Dumbledore was spouting nonsense simply to discourage Harry, his logic seems incredibly flimsy at best.

And did Karkaroff hug Dumbledore? What the fuck?

 

It seems like who's most likely to win is just a factor here.

 

Santi, it is great how you first lowered our expectations regarding the update rate, only to keep posting new chapters! Please keep it up!

The latest chapter was interesting. I liked it overall, but I have to agree somewhat with Lord Anarchy and say that there was an element of oddness in the Harry-Dumbledore interaction. For instance, I really cannot see Dumbledore "scoffing at" or "tut-tutting" Harry. To me, it just does not seem like something that I can imagine Dumbledore saying. Likewise, while I have no problem with Dumbledore being referred to as Harry's "grandfather" in prose, it looked unexpectedly childish of Harry to call him "grampa" in dialogue.

At the same time, I did not find Dumbledore's theories about the Goblet of Fire unlikely at all. I did not perceive his words as saying that all that matters to the Goblet is how the Champions prove themselves in the selection period, as some in this thread have speculated. What I thought Dumbledore did say was that Harry is skilled, yes, but asking somebody to enter his name would not give him the edge he needs over other Durmstrang students. On the contrary, it is very likely that doing so would hurt Harry's chances.

In other words, it seems to me that the Goblet evaluates Champions in their entirety, but, in Harry's case, the means by which he gets his name into the Goblet is something to which the Goblet will attach great significance. It does not have to mean that this is important when evaluating people who can enter their names freely--it might be the case that, when judging other applicants, the Goblet will evaluate, among other things, how they have responded to the unique challenges that they have faced in their lives.

Just my two cents, obviously.