So There Will Be No Penis Pictures?

 

*stares blanky at the screen with bad images coming into mind*

I hate you.

On another note, the lulz have slowed to a crawl, I demand moar.

Edit: Holy shit, in the time it took for me to post this, moar have appeared. I have a gift.

Jbern: That post is just stupid. Way too long I didn't even bother to waste my time reading it. I demand shorter burts of lulz in the future.

 

Jbern, you're fic ain't that great mate. Don't get too worked up about it.

 

I resent that.

Seeing as I've been dragged into this conflict, I might as well state my opinion on the subject:

This thread is epic lulz. While the E-Peens have been lacking, I've certainly got a good glimpse of the not-so-carefully-hidden bloated ego(s) that reside in this forum.

You know who you are.

 

You may resent that but do you deny it?

 

Bend over and we'll see.

But really, I'm not that promiscuous.

 

CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
But that's just a sidenote.

Not originally, but you've (repeatedly) said your stories are good because they are original and have many fans/reviews.
I say that's not correct.
You say you don't understand.
I say they are not good just because they have original ideas and many reviews.

And now you say they have many original ideas and waste 3 paragraphs on listing them up.



I'm asking you to respond because you have yet to say something else than "my stories are well-liked and have many original ideas".

Ah, a typical method for someone who can't defend himself: Shift the attention by insulting the other.
If you want to know what I've done fanfiction-wise, there's a little link in my sig.
If you mean anything else: I've had breakfast. I went to work a few hours ago. I've been to the shitter.
That's not relevant, you say? I say, no, it is not.

I've heard there's a author by the name of xxxbloodwrists666xxx or something. Quite a lot of reviews on her story...

No, I'll counter with "This just means your story is well-liked, but it doesn't mean it's good.

Wow, original points in your story? Dude, I didn't know!
No, wait, I did. And guess what?

Well, if we look at the word-count, yes.
If we looks at the content, no. You're still saying your stories are original and well-liked and thus good.
Sadly enough, I'm still saying that is not true.

Alright, I'm sure you will be shocked by this (SHOCKED, I say), but:
I liked Bungle well enough. It's got quite a few original ideas. The writing isn't too bad, really.

But:

MANY REVIEWS/FANS AND ORIGINALITY ALONE DO NOT A GOOD STORY MAKE!

Sheesh, one'd think you'd have understood what I'm trying to say by now.

Please do.

 

Sup, you're an author at ffa.net, jbern?



P.S. Too long, didn't read.

 

Wtfpwnage?

 

Bio: I was looking for some kind of real answer. Silly me, eh?

 

Cool pic that describes the kind of imaginary world ffauthors.net people live in.

 

"World's fic/play completely outclasses anything Jbern has ever written. That is all I have to say on that matter."

 

JBern: 1294 + 1733 + 337 = 3.3K

Tara Gilesbie: 5060

So, by your logic, Jimmy, Tara > Jbern.



Look, I'll explain this one more time. It is always, ALWAYS; quality over quantity. ALLLLWAAYYYSS.

When over 60% of those 3.3K reviews are "ZOMG! GRATE! UPDATE!!!", Ill stick with Bio, Murton, Spacks, and Jon. 4 good reviews will always beat 5K demands for moar.

It has nothing to do with the fact that people are sheep. Despite the fact that they are, is besides the point. The site demands quality. If we wanted a billion reviews, we'd have joined Mugglenet, or Darkmark, or Sink into your eyes. We didnt. we wanted quality. So we formed our own community.

While they are vaguely similar, they are indeed unique compared to theirs. Ive not read either in a long time, but if I remember correctly Thank you ms Bones had very similar methods for hooking up Susan and Harry. Dun remember what came first, but whatever. Not the point.

And I do enjoy Jec, so get off your high horse, asshat. It isnt hate of a community, its hate of a single (or two in this case) authors.

The only thing you have going for you, Jim, is that you cant possibly be nearly as bland as Kinsfire.

Voldemort does something? Not the first story to have done that. Neville being realistically portrayed, not a cowardly character, not over powered, and killing? Would have been far better if it hadnt been with the Knight Bus. THAT was something straight outta Harry's Madness.

What gets me is this air you have about you that makes it seem as if you are saying you are the only one who has done these things. I've not seen that level of arrogance outside of Bio in a long, long time.

Regardless, I dont think I've actually done a story that has Voldemort as a main character outside of Lily white in a long time. And if I ever get around to re-writing it and working out all the kinks i have in my plots and what not ...

but them I'm sure youll assume I'm just lying and bluffing and making it all up as I go along. I mean, thats what I'm good for, isn't it? But then Xiph0 created the original Huerian channel for no reason then when DarkSyaoran and I were spoiling the fuck out of the plot, planning it all out in the main IRC channel.

*shrugs* But of course, what with my nature, it MUST revolve around sex, aye?

Yes. Fairly well in the one I am thinking of and looking for.

Yes.

I did indeed do it, ages ago when I first started writing HP, when I wrote cliched tripe. I had a fairly decent portion of a chapter set up to Harry casting two wards and explaining how they worked. I have PARt of that story on one of my Live Journals that I use for stories, but Im not sure if its THAT chapter.

Spent an hour just creating and explaining my animagus potion. Same story as the Ward shit. Whatever.

With a simply statement: Your schpecial. Want a cookie? Will you be my an hero?

And if I remember right, Bio and I arent the the only ones who said it lacked emotional depth. Where as I, and I'll use your line of reasoning here, have gobs of fans complimenting my ability to make such emotions as the ones in Oedipus and Indigo so appealing. Even if it IS entirely smut driven.

DESU, BITCH!

And they say I have an ego and arrogance problem. Yet I remember when I was planning my story and running ideas by people, I was told the concept alone outstriped yours by at least a dozen people. Not all of them were even DLP members.

NAY! I said a 40 year old male writing about children between the ages of 11 and 16 is pedophilia. Same thing I said to Kinsfire, who I shall admit is worse than you can be on his best at your worst.

Is that a problem? We have our fanbases. if mine wants lawlzy bad smut, lawlzy bad smut they shall get.

Have I ever denied that I didnt write the same thing? And if you think I find that quip somehow offensive, your wrong. Ive been called a pedophile, I joke about rape, its been said I am my brother's father.

Something I think you've forgotten in all of this mindless debasing of one another:

I'll not deny I backed the idea, but if Dwit would be so kind as to post the logs from the chat sessions, you'll see it was his idea to start that petition. I recall publicly telling Raven he could stuff his offers for becoming a Mod up his ass. I remember telling Syao to pass the same message along when he PMed me explaining Raven's offer.

Yet I had them beg for my position back? Odd how that logic works.

By the way; in case you missed the dozen or so posts of Mid and myself explaining the problem, it was never the removal that pissed so many people off. It was the underhanded fashion in which it was done.

You seem to be under the impression I was attempting to be tasteful. I wasnt. In the beginning with Lust and Bluer, it was about seeing how long I could post before I got thrown off FFn. Oedipus was a request for pointless smut that turned out to have something resembling a plot.

Lily white was never meant to have smut. *shrugs* pointless smut put in when I was bored.

Alice's Wonderland was my being bored and wanting an Alice Longbottom/Harry Potter story. After many sessions of discussing it, it turned into lawlzy pointless smut.

I'll say again: It was never meant to be tasteful or part of the plot.

Enough justification.

Unless, of course, you are so far out of your own teens you can have a child who is old enough to BE a teen. You know. Fruedian Slips and all that jazz.

Not that it doesnt make me any better, being 24 myself, but its a whole fuck of a lot more pronounced in your case. You think the people you work with are going to think twice about calling you the same if someone told them you wrote smut about a 16 year old girl?

Face it fucknuts, the world aint fair and you'd be toasted, buttered up, and fucked.

Because logically, it isn't socially awkward for a 40 year old man to comment on the sexual state of a legally underaged girl. It has nothing to do with you actually BEING a pedophile, twit.

If you want to see my point, asnwer this: Are you going to be comfortable with your 16 year old daughter talking about a man literally twice her age and more older in a sexual way? or that same man talking about her that way?

And if you are comfortable with it, see previous accusations of pedophilia.

oohh... he added Toodles this time!

The rest of it is laughable and my break is over.


Ciao,
Dic... I mean ...Rickard. (Am is still cooler and that dick joke in the post before this one was excessively lame.)

 

This fight thing is somewhat entertaining. I will say that World's story is outstanding.

I read a bit back, and I recall how unique and well-crafted his Shakespeare-an take on Harry Potter was/is.

Honestly, I like Jim's fics. I think they're a lot of fun. But, I don't think being a member of FFA makes a story or author inherently good. (only people I like on there are Draco664 and Jim.)

Anyway, um...yeah.

 

Deathinapinkboa, Gio, stop asking for fucking penis pictures, Jesus christ.

Jbern: Wow, your last post was the most egotistical thing I've seen in quite some time. You just wrote a thousand fucking word essay on why your stories are amazing. Please, don't ever do that again. Yes, your stories have some original ideas, I doubt many people, even those who you are arguing with will tell you your stories are terrible, because frankly they're not, but on the same note, I had to stop reading them, I haven't read an update in quite some time. Your stories got bland and you started pandering to your audience too much and while that may net you reviews it has, as I'm sure you can tell lost you honest reviews from people that aren't total dipshits.

Touching on the age issue, I personally don't care how old you are, it doesn't mean shit to me, but I would expect a 40 year old to be a slightly better write then a 15 year old. It would be quite pathetic if a 40 year old who took writing seriously wasn't better then a 15 or 16 year old. You should have more education etc. Honestly, you're old enough to be my fucking dad.

Most of my animosity towards you has spawned from the fangirls that seemed to have joined DLP just to comment on your thread. I don't want to see some little bitch squeeing on DLP. That's not fair, oh well, your defense of them makes it much worse. Remember where you fucking are.

And to anyone that signs off their fucking posts.

It's called a signature you dumb faggots why do you think it's there?

 

The only flaw in this thread is argumentum ad hominem.

 

The major flaw of this thread is that Giovanni and Deathinapinkboa don't post often enough.

I think that quote would make an excellent headline for this thread.

 

QFT.

After reading this thread, I think I would have preferred dick pics.