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Oneshot Inremeabilis by Vash - NC17

Discussion in 'Restricted Section' started by Antivash, Jan 20, 2007.

  1. Antivash

    Antivash Until we meet again... DLP Supporter Retired Staff

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    Ghost Planet
    Title: Inremeabilis
    Author: Vash.The.Unholy
    Rating: NC-17
    Published: January 20, 2007
    Words: 2883
    Suggested Category: Restricted Section
    Summary: Further into the mind of Harry Potter, HeWhoSlayed. How will the web be spun?[AU, Dark, Heavy Sexual References, not a Children Story! Sequel to Oedipus Flower]
    Link: DLPNet Ficwad PatronusCharm


    Checked: July 30, 2012:
    The story was deleted on ff.net, but is also available on PatronusCharm

    Checked by Dark Syaoran, June 6, 2014.
    Fixed faulty Ficwad link.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 30, 2012
  2. Dark Lord Rostam

    Dark Lord Rostam Button La Famiglia Midknight

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    In that thing you call a closet. Better watch out,
    Good first chapter so far. It is going to be interesting to see where Harry and the Order go from here. Good job so far.

    4/5 for Inremeabilis so far.
     
  3. japanese_jew

    japanese_jew High Inquisitor

    Joined:
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    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111(shift)

    No smut! I'm impressed, Vash.

    The chapter is a little short, and Harry is a little inarticulate, and screams in all caps, but not bad. I can't wait to see how messed up his sister is! :D
     
  4. Thorn

    Thorn Professor

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    Oh hell yes. I can't wait for you to continue this Vash. I wondered if we were ever going to see Harry get his revenge.
     
  5. yojorocks

    yojorocks Seventh Year

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    Columbus, OH
    Very nice start, but I have to admit the Albus perspective was a bit odd. I can't quite put my finger on it, but it seemed too... young, for lack of a better term. Maybe adding in some sort of brief flash to Riddle's disappearance at the end of his seventh year with his followers would help show his age, or something with Grinewald. Regardless, nice start, and I can't wait to see what Harry does to Hestia, Emmiline, et al before he hunts down Lily...
    4/5
     
  6. Zevrillion

    Zevrillion Founder Retired Staff

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    Great start. 4.67/5
     
  7. Jeff

    Jeff Third Year

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    95
    I liked it alot. I can't quite grasp the Dumbledore P.O.V, because we've never really been given a look at his mind in any Canon story.

    I liked how you portrayed Azkaban!Harry. And the rape of Bellatrix, was quite funny for me to read.

    I await more, if there is more planned.

    4.5/5
     
  8. Shezza

    Shezza Renegade 4 Life DLP Supporter

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    Hmm, it makes you wonder what Harry's next goal is. I distinctly remember that in the last story, he vowed revenge on Sirius and his entire family, so that might be his first step.
    Of course, with the apparent resurrection of Voldemort, he might ally or join up with the Dark Lord....but somehow I don't see it coming. Harry appears to be to vain to follow somebody else.

    Anyways, 5/5 for a good start. I'm looking forward to the next installment
     
  9. Lord Apophis

    Lord Apophis Professor

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    Great start for the story. I cant wait to see what Harry will do now that he is free, and also how Lily and his sister react to him being free...
     
  10. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

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    Well written with only a few mistakes that I saw. I think a few people on IRC were surprised at the lack of smut. They nearly had heart-attacks.

    Good work.
     
  11. Jon

    Jon The Demon Mayor Admin DLP Supporter

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    We're off to Kill the Family, the wonderful family of D0000M!
     
  12. Dasha

    Dasha Second Year DLP Supporter

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    Great story. I take it all Harry's.. er.. frends are female (aka harem), right? And it would have been fun to read Roddy's opinion on his wife misfortune. (I always thought that other Lestranges suppose to be somethere near).I look foward to insight to Harry's plans and Riddle and Harry interaction.5/5.
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2007
  13. ulkser

    ulkser Groundskeeper

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    Heidelberg
    i am surprised that there is not any sex scenes in the fic. however, i like the first chapter although it is a bit short. good work.
     
  14. Klael

    Klael Headmaster DLP Supporter

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    YEEEEEEEES. I too have long awaited this sequal. Hooray! Keep it up.
     
  15. Amerision

    Amerision Galactic Sheep Emperor DLP Supporter

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    Albus's character did seem young, but he's a difficult character to write without being boring or tedious.

    Sheep
    -----
    5
     
  16. haroon_angel

    haroon_angel Fourth Year

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    karachi,pakistan
    Yes Vash,
    Add something nice for adult readers.
     
  17. Dwitty

    Dwitty Seventh Year DLP Supporter

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    I helped beta it so you already know it's great. :)

    Twas good Vashy, keep it up. :D
     
  18. Xanatos

    Xanatos Professor

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    Nice continuation on from Oedipus Flower, can't wait to see how Harry exacts his revenge, keep up the good work
     
  19. Antivash

    Antivash Until we meet again... DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    Yeah. I forgot to mention that in a note. Dwit, Amerision, Surarrin, and many many more helped me with this. kudos to all those who did and I've forgotten.
     
  20. Ragon

    Ragon Dark Lord

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    I lived in my mind but I lost my key.
    Vash I am both proud of you and disgusted with you. NO SMUT!!!!!!!

    Other than that I like it pretty well. UPDATE!!!
     
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