1. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice

WIP Master of Wood, Water and Hill by Karmic Acumen - The Hobbit

Discussion in 'Books' started by CareOtters, Jul 7, 2018.

  1. CareOtters

    CareOtters Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

    Jun 8, 2010
    Title: Master of Wood, Water and Hill
    Author: Karmic Acumen
    Rating: T
    Genre: Adventure/Humor
    Status: In-Progress
    Length: 93,312 words
    Summary: Bilbo Baggins wondered what Gandalf was thinking. Oh well, Bag End would sort him out. His house did NOT approve of vandalism, thank you very much. That rune carved into his door learned it personally. Besides, it served the wizard right for not heeding the rumors about Bilbo and the Old Forest.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10096096/1/Master-of-Wood-Water-and-Hill


    This fic is a cracky interpretation of what might have happened if Bilbo reclassed from thief to bard. And was raised by Tom Bombadil. It's a silly romp through the early stages of the Hobbit with superstitious dwarves, singing hobbits, and a semi-sentient Bag End. The plot doesn't really go anywhere, and the writing quality wavers, but I enjoyed some parts of this. There are some really lovely lyrical turns of phrase here and there, but there are also a great many lines of cringey dialogue.

    It's no masterpiece, but the nonsense is the right kind of flavour to fit in with Middle Earth, and this was a nice change of pace after some of the darker pieces I've come across recently. Don't expect to be impressed, but you might smile a few times.

  2. Zombie

    Zombie John Waynes Teeth Prestige DLP Supporter

    Apr 28, 2007
    Within the Garden of Nurgle.
    High Score:
    Gave this a read since I was desperate and no one else has commented on it despite having rated the thread.

    It was interesting enough, it definitely is some crack, but reminded me a bit of The Hobbit, so I guess that means something. Definitely a time waster.

  3. Nazgus

    Nazgus Headmaster

    Mar 16, 2011
    I got a decent ways down it but got bogged down with too much detail with not enough happening and discouraged by the Gandalf/dwarf bashing. The Gandalf isn't too bad, might not even quite qualify as bashing, but the contract scene with the dwarves made me roll my eyes and tab out.

    Came back a while later to give it another shot but it didn't really seem to be going anywhere so I stopped.

    2/5 for me.
  4. Sorrows

    Sorrows Auror Prestige DLP Gold Supporter

    Jun 17, 2008
    High Score:
    I couldn't finish it. There were some nice ideas, Bilbo the Bard is a cool enough concept and sentient Bag End was cool if under-explained.

    However Bilbo the know-it-all dickhead was just not a charecter I could stand for long periods of time. Especially when combined with poorly done charecter bashing. It definitely has the smell of a fix-it fic, where the author went through and pointedly sorted out all their issues with the Hobbit.

    I also found the writing uninspired. The author has a talent for a lyrical turn of phrase. Yet I found myself scanning large sections of it. I think it's the pacing that turns it into a dull plod. It's a shame, there were some cool ideas.
  5. Thaumologist

    Thaumologist Chief Warlock

    Jun 27, 2011
    Chester, England
    I really enjoyed this to begin with. Bilbo the mad bard was brilliant, and seeing him prancing around and causing shenanigans was great. Sentient Bad-End was fun, and the writing, in general, wasn't bad.

    But I just didn't really care.

    I started reading on my phone at work on a Friday, and didn't pick it back up over the weekend. Come Monday, I just couldn't be bothered to keep on going with "Bilbo solves everything, the musical". It felt very similar to how I remember Lord of the Rings, in that it takes a very long time to say anything, because everything is worth saying something about. It meanders around, and we get interesting diversions, but I was something like five chapters in, and they'd had dinner and gone shopping.

    Whilst this wasn't bad, it wasn't my cup of tea. 3.5, rounded down to a 3/5