lol I was thinking the same the difference is I can't get to chapter 14 or any other story in my ff.net account AGAIN

 

just read it on ficwad, thats what i do..

 

Not polishing to do apparently. Ch. 15 is up.

Indo: No succubus. Sorry. Couldn't get it to fit.

Despite the recent spat of sexually violent stories by *cough* Yar *cough* Vashy *cough*, I managed to keep rape out of it. If that disappoint anyone then consider this:

Which explosion is more impressive, the one in which pressure is released as soon as it's formed, or the one in which pressure builds up over a period of time, seething and aggregating under the surface.

 

Another great chapter. I liked the scene with the princess, you surprised me when you offed Lavander (or did you), but I suppose the princess will now replace her in Harry's harem (or will she)?

Anyway, two small problems:

- You haven't described where Harry and the girls were at the end of the chapter; Fleur's home? Veelaville? Hotel?

- Much more important: you forget to actually explain what the whole plan with the ritual was. Was it like Imperius? Why did they need so many girls to perform the ritual and who would actually control Harry in the end? How did Duchess get a green light for the plan and who is actually in charge of the Veelas now?

Yes, you touched these subject now and then, but it's so scatered, that it's hard to get the whole picture. The princess should have laid out the whole plan once Harry got her at wand point, I guess...

 

If you put it that way, I can't answer that now can I?

First question is answered in the first line of that scene. As for the others, well a few were pretty obvious so me going over them would be redundent I thought. I.e. leader part and Comtesse getting the green light.

The others just don't seem very crucial to me that I need to rehash them. The # of veela and mechanics of the "enslavement plan" was meant to set the mood (i.e. Harry's freedom was in danger) rather than to be some concrete blueprint so I don't actually have an answer to be honest.

I can see what you are saying though so I'll try to cover some of the issues beginning of next chapter. Thank you for your comment, ip. As always your honest input is a boon to any author.

 

Dudes, I am MOONPIED right now!!
BOING!
I am high, but since is the NC-17 section I feel comfortable revealing this to you. I know. Dirty secret, huh? I mean I OCCASIONALLY dabble in weed. Okay. Don't judge me.

So anyway, I dug this chapter. I liked that Harry didn't ball that princess. He showed restraint like a true blue GENTLE-MAAAAN!!! (I know there's not a hyphen ;D )

I didn't like that Harry didn't get revenge. ITs one thing to destroy a village, and quite another to slay the bitch who tried to kill your girls and inprison you. She's clearly too smart for her own good. And she openly admitted that she had plans to manipulate him. She deserved to be killed. MEanwhile, Harry's got to learn to get these bonds under control. HE shouldn't be so vulnerable especially when a significant portion of the women he's bonded to are his enemies.

SO he definitely should have killed the princess.

 

*RING*

"Federal Bureau of Investigation."

"Yes, I have information that a certain individual of the screen name "ChuckDaTruck" has been partaking of restricted and illicit substances, which is illegal under the auspices of federal and state laws. I also believe that this individual is a member of an online community dedicated to stories of witchcraft and the occult, especially as relating to black magic, and which is devoted to materials involving graphic violence, sexual (including non-consensual) perversions, rebellion against authority, and mockery of honored institutions, and the outright twisting of the intellectual property of others."

"This is the Federal Bureau of Investigation. This call is being recorded and you will be forwarded to a representative who will give you instructions on how to proceed with the removal of the stick from your ass. We have yet to find a succesful procedure, but rest assured that we are working dilligently to this end, as we have reason to believe that it will be of great asset to our own agents."

 

Well now if you put it like that...We're all fucked. lmao. Chucky its ok. we all do it sometimes.

ok. back on Topic: Riddler! No succubus? it would have been fun to have that in the fic.

 

if it helps, im krunk right now sooo. im doing more illegal things at once. they will come for me frst and it wll nit be pretty.

 

Great story, really liking it and have been following it for a while, getting slightly weird but who here can honestly say they arnt weird. Keep up the good work.

 

Meant to do this earlier. Kept forgetting.

Hehe. Well, normally I would do what you just said, but I happen to have plans for both the princess (maybe distant, maybe sooner) and for the part about the bond. That's why the result seems unsatisfactory for now.

IndoGhost: Yeah, no succubus for now... touche.

*shrugs* I'll take that as a compliment. Thanks . It'll hopefully be more normal after now.

 

*shrugs* I'll take that as a compliment. Thanks . It'll hopefully be more normal after now.[/QUOTE]

eh... who wants to be normal? Being normal sucks.

Out of pure curiosity since, the chances of this happening is pretty low what happens to the bonded if Harry dies is it just like when the girls died or is it different since hes the male veela?

 

I just read your update on FicWad. Good job. There were a few spelling errors during the Lemon sesson. You wrote 'climactic' which I think should be 'climatic'. There were a few more errors in the story but I think those are unimportant.

Are you going to add anyone else to the harem, Mrriddler?

 

It's different. What you speak of is an intellectual exercise AKA won't happen. If facing death a male veela will instinctively feed off of the energy/life force of his girls to keep himself alive. Only when his reserves (of girls) are exhausted would he himself be vulnerable to death. So Harry, in theory, would be a "immortal" but in a very limited sense. Think of it as a perverse version of the Horcruxes.

But see, Harry can't actually go "oh darn, baddie X has one of my girls. I'll be a hero and risk my life to save my # so and so harem girl". Because if Harry is too enthusiastic/reckless in combat, the one(s) paying for his mistakes will be his girls.

Edit: Quick note, this little idea isn't as much of a blessing as one might think. In fact this could 'easily' kill a male veela by making such a person overly confident and lead him into a trap. The enemy could then just tie him down and unleash enough AKs until all his girls drop dead and then kill him.

I'm pretty sure I had the word "climactic" - referring to climax - right. ^.^

As for other girls. Oh definitely. I will have a very nice and diverse canon setup, I think. But I won't do so by sacrificing the storyline.

 

Well I have not quite finished the fic yet, but so far I am really enjoying it well done. It is great to be able to real a veela story that doesn't have buttstabbers in it

 

man you write some of the dirtiest smuttiest smut smut on the planet. some of the facials described in this story just made me laugh they were so...... japanese anime. its, in a word, amazing.

 

Actually, I believe Vash holds the title for "the dirtiest smuttiest smut smut on the planet," no offense to Mrriddler, since this is one of my favorite WIPs. I actually read this one for the plot, since the smut could be almost entirely taken out or "Disneyfied" and it would still remain an engaging, well-written story.

 

None taken. You could be very well right. Glad you liked the plot though.

As for doc_gerbil's comment, you might be on something. I did try to draw inspiration from the more popular anime/hentai writers. Hmm, I guess I succeeded, at least partly.

Thank you Duke of Rothwood. No "backstabbers" here indeed, though a few tried to convince me otherwise.

 

Really great fic... but a bit slow in updates... but at least it is Updated on contrary to most fics I like...

 

Great story Keep up the good work. Are you going to get back to Andrea, Grace, & Daphne soon.