I must say that TML needs to gain some serious momentum pretty fast.
Caitiff, I disagree about the whole "this is the end" thing. Bungle just pulled the emergency brake and stopped mid-stride.
Yes, the last chapters were momentous and all, but too much was left hanging. TML made a good start, with a pretty good fight, the political games and all sorts of hints, but it didn't prod my buttocks anywhere near hard enough. The opening was kind of low key compared to what i expected. I'm not giving it full marks yet, card-carrying fanboy or not.
The thing for me is that all the developments i'm expecting after BitJ are social. There's no clue to the story. Frankly, except for the whole Growing Up Buttkicking thing, Bungle didn't have much of an arc either. Of course, I wouldn't like it so much if it was predictable, but where's the continuity?

Not that i care. Hack and Kwan makes up for loads of minor things.

g

 

Prod your buttocks anywhere near hard enough?

Jesus Christ.

 

Your not used to the 'quaint' phrasing they use yet?

{Shakes head}

Where have you been hiding? More to the point, do you have another spot that I can use.

 

5/5 Even if it has started a bit slower than I had hoped. All the reasons why I liked Bungle are back and the one thing I didn't like(the journal back and forth) isn't because it will be face to face.

I have to wonder about whether Fawkes was responding more to the fact that Harry isn't loyal to Dumbles or the imbibed demon blood.

Hack is always cool. And while you don't see it often I like the odd PoV here it gives the humor of the story a nice little twist that 3rd person just couldn't do.

 

Chapter 2 has been posted.

For your reading enjoyment, chapter 2 is now up. Credit goes to Hunted Orange for mentioning the special services award as a Horcurx. If you're really curious, Riddle removed it at some point or replaced it with a phony. When he returned for the DADA interview, he put the Horcrux and vanished the phony. It was made from the death of Headmaster Dippet and Voldemort was able to link it to the paintings of the Headmaster as part of it's protection.

The rest of the protection...well that's waiting for Harry and the rest on the 3rd floor in the next chapter.

Hope you enjoy.

Jim

 

Chapter two was good but I couldn't help wishing that the entire thing was longer. I'm sure that is just a side effect of good writing.

 

Well it was still a good read, but it just felt somewhat.... lacking I guess. Maybe it was a combination of the shortness of this chapter and I had been expecting a bigger clash between Harry and his old friends. The wards were a very interesting twist however. Looking for the next chapter of whatever fic will be posted.

 

I agree that the intial momentum has been slow in building - I was really looking forward to Harry's interaction with Luna considering the events of Bungle in the Jungle.

Still a good read though, I thought the Dippet connection to the Horcrux a novel idea.

Snoopy

 

Well, looks like Dumbledore really fucked Hermy over, though it seems Harry is going to be the one doing the actual fucking.

 

GOD FUCKING DAMN IT JBERN (yes cap locks and everything, I'm that pissed off)

Not only have you made it that Harry has to now have some form of contact with that fucking bitch Herman you had to throw in the Mental image of him shagging the shemale. I am pretty sure Harry wouldn't like a 8 iinch cock up his ass.

 

@TEaoS - I don't think I've ever met another person with more random, haven't-seen-you-in-forever, angry posts in my life. I laughed. Rep +

Jim, I thought the chapter was decent. I mean, not every one of your Bungle chapters were 'wow, that was teh awesomeness!' I enjoyed it as much as I would any other filler chapter and the point-of-view makes it even more interesting. Better make up for it being filler ... next month with a crazy actions scene or some Harry/Hermione grunge sex, though, or I'll net stalk you until you do!

As to in depth details, I'm happy with the result of the Harry/Hermione argument. It's usually either Harry getting really angry and spewing off a two page rant about all the horrible things she's done or crying like a baby. Luckily, you did neither and instead added in a twist I had most definitely not seen coming.

Problem: Luna/Harry interaction. WTF, Jim? It was like, after everything that'd happened between them, she didn't have any reaction to his presence and he just gave her a small smile. My jaw dropped in horror. Yes, the first time in all of the time I've read your works. It seemed extremely OOC for both of them and ruined the flow of that part.

What happened to the paragraph in between these two? Also notice the spelling error in the first sentence.

Besides my one large problem, I found the over-all chapter enjoyable and -taking that into account- I give it a 3.5/5, raised up to a 4 because I still enjoyed it despite that.

 

I thought the Harry/Hermione sex idea was a good one. Not only is Harry getting back at Hermione by forcing her to have sex with him he is also getting back at Ron by banging his girl/the girl he likes(don't remember if they are going out or not). So it is like hitting 2 birds with 1 stone.

I wanna see some Kwan vs Dumbledore! (Though I am sure Dumbledore would wreck his world if he was serious)

 

While I did enjoy this chapter, I still felt that it lacked something. I was really hoping that Harry would kick Dumble's in the shins or something.

I also felt that the Harry/Hermione part was somewhat... I donno fake. I can't quite explain it. It's like eating soy meat instead of the real thing. I'll have to re-read it a few times to get to the meat of the issue...

3.5/5

 

I don't see why Harry agreed to be bound by any obligations at all, let alone obligations as open ended as what he took on. Dumbledore was the one who had misbehaved.

The same problem can come up with his class-taking oath--"best of his ability" will require him to fight through hell or high water to get to class... Bill's been portrayed as pretty savvy before, why didn't he insist on a "good faith" standard or something?

 

I bet Snape is starting All Sorts of slanderous rumors among the Slytherin students right now. Something about Gryff girls doing sexual favors for pay, that Granger had to use a love potion to force Harry to look at her, that Gin Weasley goes through guys like toilet paper. He probably thinks that Harry is still a vrgin. God, I wonder what AD has been doing to Neville - Harry better warn him about strawberry-flavoured lipstick.

 

Even though considering how much action this Harry has been getting, I really can't see him going for Hermy. He hasn't come off as a person who'd guilttrip someone else into a fuck. Besides, she looks like someone 3 years younger and malnourished, hurray for mistreated girl!pedo sex.

Kudos to you for not having Harry suddenly dominate Dumbledore by the way but I was rooting for a partial victory however unlikely against Dumbledore's experience.
One of the key points in indy Harry fics is the eventual return no matter how reticent. I believe this hasn't been done as strongly as it could have been, we're just left hanging with a lot of what we've been wanting to see the conclusion of since bungle. A lot of what captivated me in bungle was the human interaction, which is sadly lacking. You could probably be pushing that up until chapter 5 or something, what do I know? I do know however that the first two chapters seriously lack said interaction.
I disagree with the one who was disappointed with the smile against Luna. I thought it fit with what they've had. It'd be quite unreasonable to believe Harry would suddenly proclaim to the world that he loved her followed by a weepy hug scene.
I was disappointed in the Harry/Albus/Hermione talk though. It felt as if so much more could be said, that you tried to rush it through. Felt a bit plastic to be honest.

But then again this is what happens when you publish a story chapter by chapter, you can't rate for something that may be coming just the next chapter but which you haven't read yet.

 

Hey, if Dippet is reporting to Voldemort, then V knows that Hermione is key to the castle's defenses. And she's a much softer target than Harry...

 

I'm just looking forward to the next installment. Jbern hasn't chickened out yet, unless he's building a house to burn. There was so much in this chapter that i felt was way too soft to be real. The Harry/Luna look is one such thing. Having Hack and Kwan leave was very strange, and the whole ward thing reminded me of Fangalla Marie's brilliant parody. I really hope the Wardscrewing is kept over Hermione's head until she ambushes him just to get it over with. Cruel and mean and all fun all around. Next, Ginslut dosed with Axe. Battleaxe! First impression's last!

g

 

Harry hasn't lost this round with Dumbledore yet. He can still get around the oath either by bringing his aunt the castle or driving Hermione away.

There could even be a Demolition Man kind of thing going on--gee, Harry tried his best to support the wards, but Bill kidnapped Hermione, wiped her memory, and stashed her somewhere that Dumbledore couldn't find her...

My problem with the whole thing is that it seems like Harry made an unforced error with the oath just so that this plot twist would work.

 

Wait, you're going to be having Harry screwing "I trust anything anyone in authority tells me" Hermione? The same Hermione who would trust Madame Pomfrey to give her contraceptive potions? The same contraceptive potions that are made by Severus Snape?