I just thought of something, I can't see anyone who doesn't hate Naruto already getting to worked up over this if only because Anko most likely scares the SHIT out of a civie at least once a week and she is a Jounin.

 

Fanon. Anko is a Special Jounin (aka a Chuunin who is jounin level in a certain aspect, in her case assassination) who needed to freak-out some bratish genin into being frightened of her test. It's fanon that she is a sex-deprived insane person who enjoys the blood of innocents.

 

The problem here is double-edged. Naruto's dislike stems from their inherent dislike and bias towards him, and he has already stated that he feels that they will overlook him for promotion specifically because he is Uzumaki Naruto, and not because of a lack of skill or incompetence on his part. Given this, he has a pretty valid reason to be cynical regarding the things they say compared to their actions.

 

I'd just like to say that Naruto is not getting spit on or beaten in the streets in this fic. Having said that, I've shown a few instances now in which he is discriminated against for who he - or more importantly, what - he is.

Naruto is not overtly antagonizing the civilians of Konoha, nor are the civilians generally blatant in their discrimination. The issue for Naruto is that, from time to time, civilians do take shots at him and he has no inclination to accept their misdeeds against him. He'll play on their fears, get a stern talking-to from Sarutobi, and move on.

Obviously though, things are coming to a head as Naruto becomes less and less tolerant of the people around him which in turn leads to more resentment and confrontation from the villagers. It's a vicious cycle.

I don't want to give the impression that Naruto is shunned and despised by everyone though. I hoped my scenes with Team 10 and at the ramen shop show that there are a fair number of people who actually like Naruto.

The point here is that despite not being universally despised, Naruto's situation is incredibly unpleasant for him.

He is not happy, and being a thirteen-year-old kid he lacks the foresight and patience to do anything to change his situation, hence Sarutobi's manipulations.

There are no mobs and pitchforks in this story.

 

Thank god for that.
I simply can't take anymore storys which start with, "he was running for his life on oct. 10, while a mob of 10-100,with pitchforks and fire, chased him in an ally to kill/beat/skin him".

Other then that I like this Naruto it's more "real" then his cannon self where he does nothing or we at least don't see him doing anything to the villagers.

 

Oh good, to be honest I kind of worry about the mental health of people who write fics where Naruto is repeatedly flayed alive and such... the way some of them write it makes me think they get off on it.

 

Copy/pasted part of the convo ongoing at TFF about this story.

 

I have no idea what TFF is frankly.

Please supply a link.

I really don't agree with what has been said in what you quoted... I didn't mean to write it that way and this is the first instance of such a complaint I've seen.

 

TFF - The Fanfiction Forum

You need to register to view anything.

Specifically the post came from the Naruto Fanfic Update Thread

 

What Hasty said.

 

Meh, you quoted everything relevant, and I'll say again that I don't think those "concerns" are really supported by what I've written.

I certainly don't think I've shown Kakashi playing favorites with Sasuke.



P.S. - I await real criticisms of this chapter. Please, I need them. Rip into me, friends!

 

You do good work Howdy, there usually isn't much to complain about. That said there were a few issues.

Your chapter length is very consistent. Unusually so. But this latest chapter seemed short. Not a bad thing per se, but a feeling that was lacking from the previous chapters of the same length. Which is weird. Did you try and compress the chapter? Or draw out a short scene?

I enjoyed your Kakashi. Actively improving his team, remaining fairly unbiased, but with a soft spot for the resident ninjutsu genius. People's complaints about how he's handling the team are unfounded. Naruto and Sasuke's rivalry is slowly tearing apart the team yes, but I believe any overt action on his part would shatter it. He's making the best of a bad situaition. Though he may have to say or teach something pre-Chunin Exams so they can realize the teamwork idea.

The Chunin Exams. Oh god the Chunin Exams. Do it right Howdy.

The Spiriitual component of chakra. I've read your essay on it, read the arguements for and against your views and it's fine that you're bringing it into the story, but remember not everyone has that level of knowledge. You may want to go into a little more detail in the next couple of chapters to help them understand where you're coming from.

That help Howdy?

 

I never wanted to over-complicate the notion of spiritual energy. If I have, then I'm sorry. I feel that I've touched on it sufficiently in the last two chapters - even moreso than the actual manga - and hope that people are receptive to the idea that Naruto isn't quite sure regarding that subject either.

Spiritual energy, to me, has always been about intent. With enough intent, a ninja can eliminate the need for seals and simply perform a jutsu without such obvious methods.

Just look at Kakashi and his Chidori/Raikiri.

In part 1, seals were necessary. In part 2, there was no such need.


Also, I wouldn't say that I do "God work," but thank you regardless.

 

>.>

Spiritual energy has not been overcomplicated Howdy. People may get lost or have a sense of 'WTF? Where is this coming from?' Is all I'm saying.

 

Then they'll have trouble with my stories, and that's all there is to it. I do try my best to rationalize canon events and powers as best I can, after all.

 

Actually, I haven't, it's just that it has been so long since your last update that the earlier discussions regarding Wild World are buried under a ton of other non-related posts regarding other stories.

I will say this though, were Naruto not a Jinchuuriki, I would agree with the statement that the Hokage is taking the idiots too seriously in their idiocy and idiotic claims. It's not fair, and it is "you're guilty before being found innocent", but you've made it clear here that the Hokage has already made it clear that because Naruto is a Jinchuuriki, regardless of how strong his seals are, makes that presumption of "guilt before innocence" an unfortunately necessity. The question then becomes "Is the Hokage able to realize how this attitude can come back to bite himself and his village in the ass"? Obviously realpolitiks plays its role in this, but at what point does the Hokage realize he creates more problems than he solves with this course of action in this context?

 

I don't see how Sarutobi is creating more problems than he solves here. Reality is that people dislike Naruto, but Sarutobi has no reason to punish those who discriminate against Naruto.

Private shop owners can deny service to anyone. Theoretically a librarian can ban anyone from the library based on certain circumstances.

It's not a case of "everyone hates Naruto, so he gets the shaft." It's more like "everyone can discriminate against Naruto, given certain circumstances, so he gets the shaft."

I hope that I haven't given the impression that Naruto is completely impotent in this story, because that was not my intention. I only meant to show that Naruto did have to deal with the discrimination of the villagers and that said discrimination wasn't logical nor warranted.

 

I never said that Sarutobi is creating problems, merely that what influence he does have over the situation is being used poorly in correcting it from the average readers perspective. I also said (poorly it seems) that the fact that Sarutobi has taken up a 'guilty until proven innocent' stance in regards to Naruto regardless of what transpired or what Naruto was accused of stinks of Realpolitik, and that realpolitik situations are issues that need to be filled before people start wondering if there is something missing or the characters are ignorant/stupid.

Your characters are not stupid, but Sarutobi's decisions as of late are given little reason behind them when presented to the average reader, which can make it appear that he's either an idiot or making very poor choices when neither is truly the case. Most reader aren't going to look at the situation of "guilt before innocence" on the intellectual level, but the emotional one. Most people aren't going to intellectually think about the consequences that may result from interference in personal problems, they're going to look at it from the emotional perspective and see a person with the power to help change the situation doing squat about it (which makes Sarutobi seem 'indifferent' to the situation at large, which makes people think that he is either an uncaring bastard or an incompetent idiot).

I'm not saying this because you're writing an incompetent leader (far from it), I'm writing this because this is how Sarutobi will appear to come off as to the vast majority of people who think on the emotional level rather than the intellectual one if you don't explain some of the rational Sarutobi is using, as well as the consequences that may result. I say this because without the intellectual perspective (logical progression, cause and effect, politics, etc.) to base their opinions on, people are only left with the emotional, and here the emotional aspect is what is making your characters seem different from what they truly are to some of your readers.

 

I don't completely agree with the TFF quote but I do think that Naruto has been treated unfairly by Kakashi. That said I don't believe that he's been favouring Sasuke, he just isn't handling the situation well.

While Naruto and Sasukes' rivalry is growing it seems to be Sasuke that's the aggressor. Naruto has every right to complain.

So Sasuke's acting in an insolent manner, ignoring Kakashis instructions (on a regular basis) and taking out his frustrations on a fellow Konoha-Nin, his teammate no less. No matter how much his skills are improving his attitude is moving from disrespectful to dangerous.

Naruto complains about it and gets punished for it? It just doesn't seem right.

 

Actually, I got the impression that Kakashi's kage bunshin was giving a similar talk to Sasuke while the real one was talking to Naruto... Just to point that out.