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The big fat DLP cliche challenge

Discussion in 'Challenges' started by Seratin, Dec 6, 2015.

  1. Jeram

    Jeram Elder of Zion DLP Supporter

    Jun 27, 2006
  2. Warlocke

    Warlocke Prisoner

    Sep 17, 2006
    The armpit of Ohio
    May I suggest: Magical Maturity

    The notion that somehow magic gives a crap that you're turning sixteen and mysteriously grants you new talents, abilities, and/or amounts of power at precisely midnight on your birthday. Kind of weird that magic would give a shit about what humans consider to be the start of our 24 hour day, especially considering most people aren't born at friggin' midnight.

    Once upon a time I was working on a story whose entire concept was taking HP clichés and either mockingly pointing them out as they are avoided, or barging headlong into them as they are played out to their most ludicrous extremes.

    The introduction was a send-up of magical maturity.

    Edit: Two other relatively popular HP gimmicks were embarrassingly ridiculous magical minions like Shadow Wolves and Ice Tigers, and custom wands (often illegally commissioned) made from "uber powerful" components like Dementor bones, cuttings from Yggdrasil, and demon blood.
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2015
  3. Download

    Download Supreme Mugwump DLP Supporter

    Aug 6, 2014
    Adelaide, Australia
    Based on the magical maturity cliché.

    Ron fears his 16 birthday because for several years when he was younger Fred and George spent time convincing him that magical maturity is real. On his 16th birthday Ron goes through all the cliché magical maturity actions while everyone else is going 'what the fuck'.
  4. vlad

    vlad Groundskeeper Prestige

    Oct 6, 2007
    Georgia, SSR
    High Score:
    Harry knows that the most powerful magical wand must be comprised of the most powerful magical creature, and there is no individual with greater power than himself.

    Ok, so for the core, he has to pluck out one of his own eyes. That sucks, and is really painful... but it will produce one hell of a wand, especially when he soaks it in the blood of the curse scar. And hey, maybe he'll get himself a cool replacement like Mad-Eye!

    Only it turns out Harry didn't really think this plan all the way through, as he sits in front of his cauldron, eye plucked and bloodied... Harry realizes just which body part is going to have to provide the wood.
  5. Zenzao

    Zenzao 500 Club King Prestige DLP Supporter

    Aug 30, 2009
    Adrift on those Binary Seas.
    High Score:
    The heart, of course. Because he is a secret dragon animagus, and dragon heartstrings are awesome. And Inferi!Dragon heartstrings are even greater, but he can't just pull it out on his own and anyway, finding a trusted friend to revive him will be difficult, what with all of Dumbledore's manipulations, tragic backstabbing by hitherto loyal allies once his past comes to light as the descendant of every family on the list of the Sacred Twenty-eight, and love potioning girlfriends-to-be waving marriage contracts under his nose in the hope of amassing his vast fortunes. The latest goblin uprising is just icing on his sad, sad cake.

    Cue his long soul searching voyage across all of Hogwarts, guided by an unknown will, into the mystifying arms of Professor Trelawney, who has predicted his destiny and will gladly offer her aid if he only takes her with his enormous schlong before the ritual is underway - his dragon schlong, that is.

    Afterwards, with the New Deathstick in hand, Inferi!Harry sees life through a different lens. He decides that Voldemort can get bent and vows to fulfill his life-long dream of becoming a professional quidditch star.
  6. janiedoe

    janiedoe Muggle

    Nov 23, 2015
    High Score:
    I've read an absurd amount of fics where Harry learns/teaches martial arts to enhance his magic. Or something.
  7. Rakkety Tam

    Rakkety Tam Professor

    Jul 4, 2011
    Surprised metamorphmagus Harry wasn't on the list or has that fallen out of fashion in recent years? It seemed like it used to be everywhere because he totally grew his hair back that one time.
  8. Peace

    Peace High Inquisitor

    Aug 17, 2011
    My computer desk
    This should definitely be on the list.

    Personally, I always wanted someone to use this as a sign that he was gifted at transfiguration/self-transfiguration or charms.